John Polk wrote:
I'd say about a foot of soil over it should be perfect. The top soil critters in that region will make use of it, creating nutrition for your tree next year. If you have neighbor's dogs, or other creatures that might dig it up, go deeper.
Nicole Alderman wrote:I found my old threads about animal death and burying beloved livestock/pets.
HELP! Can I bury my duck by my fruit tree? How deep? Anything I should know?--Here's a great quote, and it's what I ended up doing with my duck, and the other ducks who died.
John Polk wrote:
I'd say about a foot of soil over it should be perfect. The top soil critters in that region will make use of it, creating nutrition for your tree next year. If you have neighbor's dogs, or other creatures that might dig it up, go deeper.
This thread (Death of Livestock/Pets--How do you cope? How do you help your children cope?) also had a lot of great advice for helping kids deal with the death of their livestock/pets,
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Ken Mullan wrote:
Nicole, that post was exactly what I needed to make my mind up. I think I will opt instead to go bury it by our fruit tree instead of veggie garden. Thank you so much for responding!
Nicole Alderman wrote:
The mulberry tree we buried Pinkie Pie duck is doing immensely better--it had looked nearly dead and grew over 2 feet on its branches after we buried her there. And my son knows that's where the duck is buried. When the next duck died, he picked the tree to bury her by, and that really helped him (and me) cope.
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Ken Mullan wrote:So my 7 year old daughter had her first experience with death this week. One of our chickens (which we named and raised as pets) passed away, and my daughter has been nearly inconsolable. I don't want the chicken to go to waste and so was planning on eating it, but she is opposed to this and I definitely do not want to be indelicate to her feelings.
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Timothy Markus wrote:I think it's unfortunate that you also got advice on how to raise your daughter. I know it was all meant well and the advice you've been given certainly resonates with me, but you didn't ask for, or invite, critiques of your parenting.
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T Melville wrote:
Sorry, looking back, I see I was guilty of that. It wasn't intentional.
A piece of land is worth as much as the person farming it.
-Le Livre du Colon, 1902
T Melville wrote:In the future, it might help to make sure the kids understand what's in store for the animals from the beginning. We made the names of our first pigs into a constant reminder. They were Ken Ham, Kevin Bacon and (eventually) Francis Bacon. Francis started life with a different name, chosen by my four year old, based on his understanding of the butchering process. Your daughter might find that name a bit insensative right now, so I'll withhold it for now.
Our kids had no problem under that system. They didn't even mind being asked to go get some Kevin from the freezer. On the other hand, maybe boys are easier in this regard.
Devin Lavign wrote:
Ken Mullan wrote:So my 7 year old daughter had her first experience with death this week. One of our chickens (which we named and raised as pets) passed away, and my daughter has been nearly inconsolable. I don't want the chicken to go to waste and so was planning on eating it, but she is opposed to this and I definitely do not want to be indelicate to her feelings.
I think there is a big difference from a chicken a child has raised as a pet vs one they know is livestock and part of the cycle of farm life.
Even then a lot of children can have a difficult time when they experience the livestock's end of life. I feel parents should be flexible but firm in these situations. Firm in the sense of not bending to the child out of hand, but flexible enough to be aware not every child can handle such things at the same ages. What was fine for one child might need a couple extra years for another. Personalities are different and parents usually will know when one is less ready for something than others.
For pets it doesn't matter if it is a dog, chicken, fish, or cricket. Emotions can run high and a lot of latitude should be provided, within reason. The death of a pet is a way to learn about life and death, but it does not need to be (and likely should not be) a lesson in butchering and eating of livestock. Finding a way to respectfully treat and return the loved pet to the earth is an important lesson for the grieving child. Finding a long lived tree for the pet to feed, helps teach the same lesson as eating it does, but in a more respectful way to the child's feelings. The child will have that tree in her life for a long time to come. She will likely give that tree extra care, as an extension of the care and love she had for the chicken. In this way she will have an understanding of life continuing through new life coming from death. While not perfect, it helps soften the blow that death brings.
I applaud you Ken for respecting your daughter's feelings, grief for a pet can actually be harder than the death of a person. Due to the unconditional love pets often give.
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