Managing anxiety around readiness

So I imagine many of us on Permies are similarly situated - ahead of the curve generally in terms of preparedness, and yet annoyed/angry/anxious with ourselves that we have not advanced our systems and resilience further along than we have. Looking around and thinking I haven’t done this, and this, and this, and this, and this....you get the idea. Yeah, 80 million things I intended and wanted to do, but haven’t yet gotten to.

For myself, when I get find myself getting worked up, I try to take a deep breath and say OK, there is more to be done, and yes, if I had unlimited time and money for the last five years, I would be much further along toward resilience and self-sufficiency. But, I have made progress, and relative to most, am in a pretty good place. I should now focus my energies and attention on....

And here is where you all come in. What are the most important things that you feel you need to do that you haven’t done, and can reasonably accomplish in the next few weeks?  Here is my top 3 list so far:

1. Build community. Reach out to others to offer assistance and resources where I can.

2. Chickens. Get a chickshaw built and get some chicks.

3.  Garden. Planning and bed prep. While I have a good supply of seeds, get some more.

LOL...  I have been living this lifestyle for 50 years, and there is huge amounts of stuff that I "could" have done but haven't....   Life happens...

Day before yesterday I tore the remaining parts of my 20 x 60 greenhouse out in the hay field.  It was caved in and destroyed when we bought this farm 8 years ago... Every year for 8 years I have said, I really need to get that torn down and moved it close to the house followed by why on earth did someone put that up all the friggin way out there?...

Here it is just over 8 years later and I finally managed to get around to it.  Don't feel bad about it or worry, just do what you can.  Stressing is one of the worst things we can do in life, it affects our physical and mental health bothe, it even appears to affect the length of our life and genetic processes.  Stress is not a worthwhile hobby, but gardening sure is...  

I am enjoying this Cornavirus vacation, I using the time to get caught up on things I have been putting off for many, many years...   Blessing in disguise...  Good luck and have fun with your projects...

Artie, I will be honest, this has been a major reorg of my priorities. Your words are so true, a couple months ago I thought I had things under sort of control, and now I am clearly not in control.

I have been involved in a church for three years, and this is a fundamental principle in most religions (I would think) and even AA- I am not in control. In my life, this is probably more stark than most given my job. In Italy there is around a 5% mortality at my career field since the start of this, in my demographic. I'm otherwise healthy, on no meds, and suddenly have a 5% risk of death and about the same for severe lung damage which might require long term oxygen or limb loss.

I have no control over this. What I have control over is my response, and not perfectly. I have poor sleep since I am quarantined away from my family for weeks at a time. I will not be able to have physical contact with them until the situation stabilizes which could be  months. This is not to pity me- anyone in health care should go into it knowing that we assume risks others would not. Same for EMTs and police and fire- I have huge respect for people who run into the fray.

What I can do- given my faith, if I am up in the middle of the night, I am instructed to not be anxious (Mat 6:27 Which one of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his life) but to pray (Phil 4:6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.) I have to believe that prayer does not change God, it changes us. The next step is harder, it is to step into that uncertainty and become humbled in it as in the beautitudes- Blessed are the poor in spirit for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven. To admit to others and to yourself that you are not sufficient, to reach out and ask for help. I know this is the hardest part for me because I am so deeply arrogant. I fight it in my relationships and I have a history of hurting people through my pride. I am truly powerless to change on my own, I have tried and failed again and again.

And that is where I am, I have made some recompense with people I have wronged, attempted to identify actions and beliefs that hold me in pride, asked for God to humble me.

It seems more important than the ten projects lining my garage.

there's always more to do. do what you can when you can keep taking those deep breaths and be grateful for what you do have.

Bruce is right, there is always more to be done. As soon as I made the call to stay in and work around the house I relaxed. Certain things are inevitable, the spring for example. I am prepping for my garden now, I recommend occupying your mind with work, garden, livestock, reading etc. Once you have taken your mind off circumstances for a few days, a week or more you will settle into a routine and life goes on.

I wish everyone well in these interesting times.


Ben