VROOM The Ford F-150 saga

So I have been working on Steve's 1977 ford f-150 2-wheel drive pickup.
It was having carb issues and had been for a while. Kathy asked me to go thru and just fix anything I could. Was willing to spend several thousand if needed.
Much cheaper and smarter to repair what you have rather than spend bunches more buying a modern electronic nightmare that will only last 10 years.

What a pain in the ass! I forgot about American full-size trucks being so much bigger and taller than Subaru's!
So as I could see the old carb leaking, where the throttle plate shaft passed thru the carb. Replacement was a better plan than a rebuild.
After searching to locate a Newly built carb (for a 45-year-old truck) I had to settle for a rebuild from a parts house.
$330 Yikes but she needed it so money well spent.
New plugs & wires, rebuilt, really pretty clean carb, all new fan belts this thing should run great!
I get it all installed, hop in the cab and crank it over VROOM starts right up! Idles great seems to rev up just fine, although a slight hesitation... All good!
I inspect the front end, all tight so I grease everything and inspect the wheel bearings and brakes. Kathy had complained it felt squishy steering so I replaced both front shocks went around back and inspected the drum brakes and shocks, all good there! I'm thinking it's time to take it for a drive over to Steve's and let Kathy have it back.
WRONG!!!
I back out of the shop down to the road. Running fine, get to the bottom put it in drive step on the fuel... and it dies! WTF? Starts right back up and idles PUCKER I put it in gear and if I flutter the pedal I can keep it going and it starts to go Ha I got as far as the gravel pit and stopped something is wrong? Back up and baby it up the driveway into the shop. I decide I should recheck the timing. It's advanced a bit so I go to adjust it... guess what? The distributer body is FROZEN! PUCK, this happens to this particular motor, I attempted to let it soak in Kroil overnight even though I knew it would not work. SURPRISE! It did not work PUCK!  After setting at TDC I got out the big hammers chisels long screwdrivers and other implements of destruction, several hrs later I had it out in 4 large broken pieces... Sigh. I order up a brand new Distributer, not too bad at $85. New Distb comes and drops right in. Little cranking and adjustment and VROOM it's running... Idles great! slight hesitation but seems much better... WRONG! PUCK same shit different day WTF? I try everything possible, change the timing , adjust the mixture, tighten this, move that... I finally look at the pretty carb again... Climb up and look down the carb while the motor is running and what do I see? Enquiring minds might want to know. The fucking accelerator pump is not pumping! WTF! Its 4 screws are accessible while carb is still attached, so I remove it and discover they installed the spring upside down...
I fix it I'm smiling got this pucker figured out now! I hop in the cab
VROOM Idles great (seems to like idling) Rev it up, oh yeah pucker is gonna go now! Back down the drive to the road put it in gear step on the gas and it dies! mother fucker this thing is driving me crazy!
Back in the shop I give up and call brother Tim asking for help!
Tim and Mark show up, they are Ford fanatics. We spend an hour trying this and adjusting that and conclude that the pretty shiny carb is a piece of shit!
Now I know I could open that carb up find where the rebuilder pucked up and make that carb work!  Not touching it! They have paint markers on the screws, if I put a driver to them I can't return it. I poke around the shop and discover my old race car holly carb.
It will bolt right up but... it is jetted too small having been on a Subaru motor AND here is the deal breaker for giving it to Kathy...
it has a hand choke! Perfect on a race motor but not so much for an older woman!  Damm, I keep poking around thinking maybe I had a Ford carb... and I find one! It is even the correct one! Mud daubers have filled every open hole, I have no memory of why I have this carb sitting. My plan after Tim left was I was going to pull the working carb off of my pickup and see how it worked.
The next morning I spend an hour picking and blowing out mud dauber nests. The rest of the carb seems to be in good shape. Puck taking my carb off, I'm installing this one! I get it installed, takes a bit for it to fill up but the motor starts and idles rough for a moment but then clears up... So here we are it idles great... heard that somewhere before...
back it down to the road put it in drive step slowly on the petal half expecting it to die again... and spray gravel 30' down the road behind me VROOM for real! It's fixed!!!
Funky old bee nest carb saves the day and after I return the $300 carb I'll give Kathy $150 back!  Win-Win!
Proof once again that pretty looks can often be deceiving. Best to go with the mud Dauber special.
And there ends the Ford saga!

Sounds like every time I have ever worked on a vehicle...

That's the first truck I ever drove. My dad's '77 was white though.

I am feeling sentimental though. My '97 F-150, which I've had so long as to start to think was invincible, is not. Big coolant leak from the rear of the block. Checked everything that doesn't require major surgery, no joy.

Ugh, you think THAT truck is hard to work on hahaha. I have a bad feeling about this.

Only a 30ft spray of gravel, ya no tryin hard enough!!!
Great familiar story.
I have a Chev C20 running on LPG, i fitted a Holley to it just for the throttle body.
I used a coat hanger bent to length to adjust the tension of the accelerator cable, and I have a 2 inch C clamp holding the same cable outer in place.
That was temporary 12 years ago!