I started smoking at 15 with my cousins. I loved it! Everything about it, the taste, the smell, the alone time, often using a cigarette as a reward after accomplishing a task. After I got married my wife would ask me to quit but I didn't want to. I did cut back at home to around 2 a day. Never could give up my before sleep smoke.
As time went on I promised the wife I would quit when I turned 30. I did just that for 6 months. That's when I came home one night from work to hear her say she wanted a divorce. This caught me completely off guard out of left field and devastated me like nothing has ever done before. We tried to fix things but she left 6 months later and I was up to almost a pack a day.
I tried to quit a few times over the last 10 years but it never stuck more than a week. My boys asked over and over but I couldn't. I'd hide it from them so I didn't have to hear it anymore. I'd have 1 or two a day at home but smoked every chance I could at work because I was miserable.
March of 2017 I decided I had enough and was leaving the 9-5 on my 40th birthday a year later. I started to save any money I could. My Cigarettes cost almost $8 a pack here do I switched to grape little cigars. Best thing I could do! I only smoke a half at a time they are so strong. Now almost a year after leaving my job I'm pretty stress free and hardly smoke at all. I will have one watching the sunset, with a nightcap, or before bed but it's not a addiction anymore. I'm breathing better too. When I smell cigarettes I still want one but I know I won't ever go back.