I was fairly lucky-- I did have hot flashes, but the main problem for me was the way my sleep was interrupted by the hot flashes and in general. In the run up to menopause, the most troubling for me were the terrible memory lapses-- far worse than normal, and thankfully they only lasted a a few months. Also the fits of murderous rage-- far worse than normal, and similar to really bad pms. Also thankfully short-lived.
One thing I noticed, is that the women I know who had daughters going through puberty at the same time -- as I had also -- seemed to suffer less. In fact when my daughters started menstruating, my own periods returned for a few years! Finally they ended and are not missed. But I think my experience was easier, maybe because it was made more gradual.
I do have some joint pain, but I am genetically inclined to osteo-arthritis, and so far it's starting more slowly than for some in my family.
I agree with others who mentioned the lack of info about and acknowledgment of this stage, and I'm glad to see people talking about it.
