new videos
hot off the press!  
    more about rocket
mass heaters here.

more videos from
the PDC here.
  • Post Reply Bookmark Topic Watch Topic
  • New Topic

Hippie jokes  RSS feed

 
Chris Lumpkin
Posts: 49
Location: Richmond, VA (zone 7a)
6
  • Likes 1
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
After listening to Paul and Alex's "no soap or shampoo" podcast today, I am inspired to start the official permies-dot-com hippie jokes thread. I know many of us here may identify with some hippie attributes, or know and love others who do. Nonetheless, it is acceptable and even healthy to laugh about it.

Alex's contribution in the podcast was:

How do you know a hippie stayed at your place?
(He is still there)

Now some of my contributions:

How do you get rid of the hippie staying at your place?
(Offer him a job)

Where do you hide money from a hippie?
(Under a bar of soap!)

What do you call a hippie who just broke up with his girlfriend?
(Homeless)

How many hippies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
(None, hippies screw in tents)

Why do hippies wave their arms when they dance?
(To keep the music out of their eyes)

Any more, anyone?
 
Jocelyn Campbell
master steward
Posts: 4145
Location: Missoula, MT
388
books food preservation forest garden hugelkultur toxin-ectomy
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
Well done, Chris! Washington permie instructor Kelda Miller (also in the podcasts with Paul doing the first reviews of sepp holzer's Permaculture) keeps a list of hippie jokes. She shared them in the talent show at the end of the PDC that ended just before Sepp's visit in Montana. I think this was one of Kelda's, or maybe it was Paul's:

Why do hippies wear patchouli oil?

So blind people can hate them, too!
 
Dale Hodgins
garden master
Posts: 6676
Location: Victoria British Columbia-Canada
252
  • Likes 1
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
How do you stop a hippie from cashing a welfare cheque? Hide it under his work boots.

Here's one I've just coined for the occasion. How can you tell that a group of hippies are broke? They all sit in a circle and share one skinny ciggarette.

Just made up another ---- How can you tell a hippie from his sheep dog? The hippie looks really shaggy--- and ---How do you know that Australian hippies are really shaggy? They have lots of children. (google shag) slang.
 
wayne stephen
steward
Posts: 1793
Location: Western Kentucky-Climate Unpredictable Zone 6b
104
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
How about Foxworthy versions : .......You might be a hippie.
If you have ever driven a school bus with a Volkswagon van welded on top ...
If any of your children have " Hummingbird " for a middle name ....
If you still own a copy of "Be Here Now "......
If you have ever held a lighter and a banana at the same time....
 
Leila Rich
steward
Posts: 3999
Location: Wellington, New Zealand. Temperate, coastal, sandy, windy,
88
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
I reckon I can get in on that Foxworthy hippie business
If you don't remember what you loved in the 60s, but dug Jethro Tull in the 70s, chilled to Clannad in the 80s, grooved to Phish in the 90s and spent ten days on Goa tripping out to psychedelic trance in the 'naughties'...
Apologies to amnesiacs and lovers of hippie music
 
Greg Harvey
Posts: 28
Location: Columbia, Missouri
1
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
wayne stephen wrote:How about Foxworthy versions : .......You might be a hippie.
If you have ever driven a school bus with a Volkswagon van welded on top ...

HA! You have to see one of these to appreciate it. We saw one just last month so I'll share my photo of it. I don't really think it was in driving condition. Saw it near McMinnville Oregon.
It looks like there is also a VW beetle welded on behind the bus too.
DSC02785.JPG
[Thumbnail for DSC02785.JPG]
School bus/VW Bus hybrid?
 
wayne stephen
steward
Posts: 1793
Location: Western Kentucky-Climate Unpredictable Zone 6b
104
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
I owned one myself - 1960 GMC - climbed up into van through a hole in roof with rope ladder . Had a pot belly stove and propane refrigerator. Wish I still had the refrigerator. Swiss made . Do know someone with middle name Hummingbird. Never smoked bananas . Owned a copy of " Be Here Now " until 1993.

Two hippies smoke a joint and then go to the ballet . Neither says a word through the entire event . An hour later driving home , one of them says " Why don't they just get taller girls ? "
 
Jocelyn Campbell
master steward
Posts: 4145
Location: Missoula, MT
388
books food preservation forest garden hugelkultur toxin-ectomy
  • Likes 1
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
This ad is mocking hipsters (maybe not hippies per se) but I think the humor still applies!

From https://seattle.craigslist.org/see/for/5616169580.html

Push Mower- Be green and save the earth!!! - $150 (West Seattle)
condition: like new
make / manufacturer: Fiskars
model name / number: StaySharp Max 18



Tree hugging, bicycle loving, fossil fuel hating, Prius driving, Bern feeling hipsters rejoice!! Another opportunity has arisen for you to save the world yet again and judge others for the wrongness of their ways. How do you ask? Well put down your organic kale and kombucha smoothie and stop googling how to grow the perfect organic hops for your home brewed IPA (lets be honest you just really can't in W WA) and turn your focus to your lawn.

Yes, that poor patch of green that you, the 1%'er owns, or rents from the 1%. Although we love to say that the nitrogen running off of the patch of grass will get into the watershed and suffocate all the salmon , we would be damned if we didn't want to keep it green during the summer right? Who doesn't want to keep our grass green for our ultimate Frisbee games, or even better yet, to lay out on while reading a how-to book on keeping our stache's nicely waxed with organic-sustainable bee's wax from our favorite independent bookstore? I mean common!

To be a true Seattle hipster you must, absolutely MUST be green or at least greener than your neighbors when it comes to taking care of your lawn. What better way of showing your contempt of their street cred than to own one of the greenest pieces of modern tech for your lawn? Although this was not constructed from recycled illegal fishing trawlers, it is a push mower that is fancier than most. Not only does it use inertia to help cut your grass faster and easier, but it also mulches! MULCHES!!! Unfortunately I did not buy it from a local business run out of the back of grandpa's garage with a price tag tied to it with hemp twine. I bought it from a big box store. Because I did, you can use your newest iPhone to look up the information in the link posted below.

http://www.homedepot.com/p/Fiskars-StaySharp-Max-18-in-Push-Walk-Behind-Non-Powered-Non-Electrical-Reel-Lawn-Mower-6201-62016935J/202563265

Why am I selling this wonderful piece of technology in this environmentally friendly city? Because I work and care more about bloody convenience than using a push mower. Does it work? Yes. I've kept it in good shape and maintained it during the past 2 years that I have owned it. No rust and the blades are still sharp. But like all push mowers, unless you mow your damn lawn weekly, it will push the grass down and require additional passes. Why does my grass grow so fast you ask? Because I fertilize the shit out of it.

What will I cut my grass with now you ask? The biggest baddest fossil fuel powered mower that I can find. There is nothing like the smell of gas exhaust wafting through the neighborhood after feeling the rumble of the powerful two stroke engine shake a person's bones on a Saturday morning to let people know who is really part of the counter culture in this town.

So if you like buying used stuff and saving the environment, hit me up. Otherwise this just might be disposed of in the least environmentally way possible. YOUR MOVE hippie...

Yeah, the usual CL deets: Must pick up, cash, and I have all the manuals still. If I wanted to give it away for free then I would have said that so no need to ask.
 
I am going to test your electrical conductivity with this tiny ad:
All of the Appropriate Technology Course video (~77 hours) - HD instant view
https://permies.com/wiki/65383/paul-wheaton/digital-market/Technology-video-hours-HD-instant
  • Post Reply Bookmark Topic Watch Topic
  • New Topic
Boost this thread!