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Hi there, Bear here! Seeking what is seeking me

 
Posts: 13
Location: Onalaska,Washington
personal care woodworking homestead
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Hello! Non- Binary transient.
Hoe-ie, Farm-y, hip-ie
I am 32. (I have been objectively / subjectively surviving on my own since 16, all over the country)
I am currently in Portland Oregonish
I am currently living in 2 vehicles. Xuv04, buick88
One I use to work and do landscaping jobs /supply with, and the other I use to sleep in. Sometimes I sleep in my work vehicle because it is larger. Sometimes the garage because I like to sleep nude.

I am vegan. I eat as raw as I can. (Dandelion season!) Animal crackers, chips, and sugar are my weaknesses! DAMN YOU PEANUT BUTTER!
I smoke herbs, often wrapped in a tobacco leaf(I have used maple with great success.)
I have micro-dosed twice.
I don't take a pill(illegal or over the counter. Like I gotta be dying)

I have been in the PNW since AUG 2019.
I CAME OUT HERE TO END MY HOMELESSNESS....by living in the woods. (this is illegal, and you are subject to huge amounts of untold violence by people who enjoy doing fire raids).
Sold my van, sisters helped me get a cheap flight and landed here with no plan(I did have a partner(TECTONIC) to meet when I arrived)
After my partner's partner connected me to a Coworker

Boom

Trailer surfing through the muddy fields after corraling 2 350 lbs hogs of a wet clay inclined mountainside.
The first attraction to a AMAB person(panromantic discovery, all you can keep your stamen away from anything flowering over here).

BUILD ALL THE THINGS!
Roundhouse
Lean-to
Inseminate a cow
Apple cider
See a steer(I'm 6'5, it dwarfed me)
Admire the predators' hogs are
Cure a blind obese hog
Throw logs down a hillside
Make a 4-inch x 3 ft x 12 tabletop(and then move them all alone...)
Build a dream cottage
A-frame
Food trowel
Duck hut
Goat enclosure
Paths
Clear blackberry
Outhouse
Plant trees
Prune
Graft

(This was like 2 -5months of intensive movement)
All the dances at camp singing wind
...but then the fire nation attacked!

-sigh- I am polyamorous. I can love many people.. Narcissistically speaking You are me and this is masturbatory at best. (IF WE ARE ALL ONE ENERGY THEN I SEE NO POINT IN DISTINGUISHING, I am practicing this more) I can and have been polygamous(trust, deep trust needed).

My experience with living on farms has been a huge disappointment. (knowledge gained but the experienced was leaving me falling away from the farm life)
My experience with dating older women(afab) in the spiritual community has been slightly disheartening. (especially when they have toxic partners from being isolated together so long). The reason I admire older people is that you seem so sure about your life.

What I've discovered is you have just survived and made a world where your life will not be challenged. (Listen here, if you don't like yourself, I am not for you. I will ask, "why", daily. I love me. Only outside opinion attempts to change my narrative)

While my astute knowledge of the culture isn't sound my intuitive processing is through the roof.

I can build.  Farm.  Rear animal. Love.  Meditate.  (And kiiiinda play 2 songs on the piano)

If you have animals. They will become mine. Anything I put both my hands on I figure out how it works. I will scratch them better than you. Sorry, not sorry.

I am like a cat, puppy, and crow merged.
I will gift you dead things. (plant-based and otherwise)
I collect supplies if I have a space to store them (everything my dude, is supplies if you are me. Which I am, so this is GREAT.)
I make stuff... out of stuff... -cue theme song- (bare Necessities begins playing) https://youtu.be/dT4hFa5g76w (BTW not my music)
I prefer organization and labels to clutter and eclectic storage. (I will build the space to store it properly)

BDSM community soft Dom, caregiver, top from the bottom, etc.
Sagittarius 12/13/ 88 714 am Baltimore Maryland
I am a heated blanket, hot chocolate, and a warm hug when safe. I am Vesuvius when not safe. We decide safe waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay before I come to see you.

I believe in talking(like hours of talking vs. Arguing. I will stop an argument to research words together.) I am loving. I believe yelling while useful In some cases is not needed when communicating needs and wants(unless we are horizontal and agree to it). I also will simply just opt for an orgasm should we need to quick pep, I will expect a talk later at calmer energies.

I don't know where your trauma comes from. (I will ask, a lot)
I am solving my own. It seems to be going well(I mean you've read this far. I sound pretty sure of myself. Right? Right??) I have only yesterday to thank for today, for the me who was is no more.

I have a sleuth of back story drowned in pain. I am the light/dark on the otherwise. As are you in your tale. A tale I intend to explore in-depth. -smirking because I am a child who learned innuendo too young to not hear it in my daily life for the rest of my life- eh eh-eyebrows eyebrows

Standing or sitting I want no pissing contest. (I'm sure physically I hold more water though unless you are bloated and cramping)

I am eternally optimistic and will always wake up happier than I went to sleep. (It can be a curse when you suffer the loss of life or lost in general)

I have an oral fixation(see Polynesian men with papaya to cross-reference)

Sheeeiiiiiiieeeed(pronounced "she'd", in place of s#!+, I swear like this often. A few favorites are "William Shatner", "Son of the Mother", "string of violent curses".)

I make weird noises when excited. Boop, bloop -pops lip like a soda pop bottle.
I am a sporadic ball of energy or I am a smoldering lump of coal that toils the night away.

I have no desire to ruin you or how you feel about anything? I am known for changing perspectives. Maybe you can shift with me.


I say this to people like me so if it resonates please, "a star doesn't recognize its own shine, only the heavenly bodies in its orbit can truly benefit from its light. Keep shining! This is the checkpoint! You like me are a necessity (I call myself Bear light Necessity[bearli] and use this name legally yet am not allowed to use it on this site because it sounds fake so I've had to make an email. Make an account. And lie to everyone I interacted with. I will not respond to my birth name.)

I am called radically honest. Earnest. A waterfall of constant flow. Sunlight. Sunshine.

When at my freest everything in an area will feel the lightness of my personality. Attempting to trap me with dishonesty with dim my light immensely (ask the story of the Mossyrock homestead or the Clackamas creek homestead, filed rife with mystery and drama)

Each coin has two sides. I am outright evil should I feel justified(this will scare many. I am not vindictive or spiteful, just if I cut the tie with someone toxic I send them love across that bridge to west bubbaphuq... it just is strapped to a nuke. Love you, okay, byyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyeeeeeeiiii. Let me know when you're home safe! )

My whole point in this post is to
1. Vent a smidgen as most posters seem to do in some shape and or forum... da dum tis.....
2. say to the person of my dreams, "I too am seeking you".

I can be distant when processing what I feel are negative emotions. I am clear when communicating. I will ask you like  800 million questions. I feel as humans we assume that because we are using the same words that context is applied when speaking. For example, I know that I (having a deaf parent) understand and use English as a second language and read body cues. I SEE YOU.  It has been called disturbing to experience.

If we take a second to be authentic in every moment, then the only thing we can be met with is Authenticity.


Good job you. I am way more long-winded when talking. Thanks for reading this.

I was seeking ads and attempting to respond but I feel like this gives a better feeling of me for those seeking what I maybe and gives space for them to reach out.


I feel like I already love everyone. I feel as if I get what I want. Now I am being specific.

You have land. You want me to come to be the energy you were missing. You don't mind having a reverse harem(I attract people where ever I am. If I erect it they will cum) (no bear, no. Stahp et)
You love the idea of letting me do all the things!
You are looking for something but can't put your finger on it.
You have safety, healthy, and happiness mapped out and only need an unstoppable force.

Me too.

I prefer people older than myself. My age group is cool (kinda)I just don't seem to care much about this day and age and only concern myself with techniques and farming applications. You gotta be above all the stuff the world is throwing(I am many colors if you treat me as one color I will call you racist, Taste the 🌈)


Okay.  I have exhausted my dopamine with this post.  Resting and eagerly awaiting.

I love me.  I love you.  I hope you find what is seeking you all too.

I have happiness.
I have peace.
I have the wherewithal to continue even though being alive is hard, even so much I want to make it easier for others and do what I can to secure no one has to suffer as I did.
What I am awaiting is somewhere I can build my biggest best nest. Permanently.

Let me elcletically and systematically turn your IRL home into fantasy from inside my head.

All energies are welcomed.
(I would say "light and love prior". If warranted I will be a death ray.
I am an alchemist.
What is for me will be transmuted so I can digest it however is healthiest for NY vessel.

You are,  I am.


(If you got to the bottom and the tyos are what is bothering you, we won't get along unless I try to appease you. And I won't not with something as made up as written language. You want context or clarification gently ask me. I used gramerly to fix some jazz but I speak better than I write. This took like 2 hrs)

Just in case you see this Mrs. J. Wolfe " (I am safe. Always, All ways. Thank you.")
IMG_20210331_102115_01.jpg
[Thumbnail for IMG_20210331_102115_01.jpg]
20210322_115141.jpg
A trellis I built for a love
A trellis I built for a love
9be53de1-9a05-4f3d-bfcf-037e29308103.jpg
Reference of my nude frame
Reference of my nude frame
IMG_20210331_124251_01.jpg
My neck
My neck
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Rainbow is my favorite color. Emphasis on black and pink tied for 1st
Rainbow is my favorite color. Emphasis on black and pink tied for 1st
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Stuff for stuff
Stuff for stuff
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All the stuff
All the stuff
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All the faces
All the faces
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Oh? Didn't I tell you? I'm mostly earth at this point
Oh? Didn't I tell you? I'm mostly earth at this point
 
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https://permies.com/goodies/greenhouse
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