John, welcome to Permies! Good for you for wanting to repair those jeans. I second Saana's suggestion to follow that link and check out the videos and examples of what folks have done. Some use a sewing machine but a lot of them don't: needle,
thread, and a sturdy patching fabric doing a fantastic repair job. You can make the patch as plain or fancy as you'd like!
I have to agree with you about the iron-on patches. The fabric is cheap and glues on them never stand up to more than a couple of washings. However, due to the chemicals in them, we permies pretty much consider fabric glues to be "toxic gick" and we work with alternative techniques instead.
I'd say, pick a pair and make a start. I'm guessing your sewing skills will improve wonderfully, simply by doing. This kind of repair is great practice and has useful results.