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Ow! What's biting me? Brachypnoea clypealis!

 
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I'm in southern Missouri, and every so often something bites me. It's a teeny tiny black beetle, it doesn't sting, it doesn't itch, but it feels like it has teeth like a shark and BITES!! OW!! Short sharp intense pain, stops within a minute or so, but a LOT of pain for it's size. I'm currently calling it a shark beetle. Any idea what it's name really is?
 
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Did it look something like this?
 
James Freyr
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I came across that picture on this Reddit thread https://www.reddit.com/r/whatsthisbug/comments/8ro04u/in_missouri_smaller_than_pencil_head_black_and/  while searching. Apparently it's from Missouri also.
 
Pearl Sutton
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Possibly? Just itty bitty, black, and I swoosh it off, because it bites. I haven't spent time looking at it. Maybe 1 mm each way, looks like a black dot.

Edit: Looking at it more, quite possibly. Brachypnoea clypealis the 4th pic there looks like what I see when I look down.
So it's a leaf cutter? It's trying to harvest me?! AUGH!! :D
It's got some evil little jaws then.
 
He is really smart. And a dolphin. It makes sense his invention would bring in thousands of fish.
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