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Kyle the Second’s Bootcamp Experience BRK

Kyle Clawson

pollinator

Posts: 56

Location: Provo, UT

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posted 2 years ago

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Adventurer’s log, day 1

I journeyed into the forests of Montana today in search of the elusive Wheaton tribe. This tribe maintains some contact with the outside world, but has been known to pelt unwelcome guests with various herbs and spices from the top of their “huge-el-culchure”. I prayed I would not meet this fate.

I arrived at the hour indicated by the sky messages. Some of the tribesmen showed me around the gardens and dwellings. They did not seem put off by my meat pillow, so I stashed some of the meat I brought in their cold chambers. I brought them a ceremonial bag of coffee and they indicated this offering was accepted by the sharing of “peet suh”.

I met with the half-giant chief while eating peet suh and enjoyed getting to know some of the members of the tribe. They seem to have, tentatively, accepted me as a guest.

I will be expected to work while I dwell with the tribe. I’m told ceremonial music is played to begin the day. I’m excited to witness this ritual.

The tribe seems to have domesticated several felines. The relationship seems reciprocal in nature. The felines keep the village clear of pests, and the half-giant rewards them with food. I suspect this food has been traded for with another tribe.

One last event is of note. I seem to have gotten my limited-terrain vehicle stuck in the mud. One of the tribesmen attempted to assist me in its retrieval, but alas, we were unsuccessful. We shall attempt again in the morning.

Overall, this first encounter was successful. I had to reassure my friends as much. My friends back home were concerned the nature of this tribe was not benign, but I have assured them otherwise.

I shall attempt to further ingratiate myself to the tribe and provide regular updates.

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Set your house in perfect order before you criticize the world
Assume that the person you are listening to might know something that you don't
Abandon Ideology
Be grateful in spite of your suffering

Kyle Clawson

pollinator

Posts: 56

Location: Provo, UT

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posted 2 years ago

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Adventure log, day 2

The natives were kind enough to dig my vehicle out of the mud this morning. They seem quite skilled and are adept problem solvers

After my vehicle was rescued, I joined the natives to participate in an activity where we cut the branches off of logs. I’m not certain how this activity fits into their rituals, but I do know it was decently physically demanding. Perhaps it helps the males and females ascertain physical ability as a precursor to mating behavior. I can only speculate on why wood fascinates this group.

We enjoyed a small lunch and then returned to work with wood again. This time I was introduced to a “sah mell”, a contraption for dividing wood into smaller parts. We were able to obtain a few satisfactory planks, though the sah mell began to malfunction towards the end of our endeavors. Alas, I hope we can recuperate this brilliant piece of technology.

The natives continue to share their food with me—it seems I will be allowed to dwell with them a little longer. I will attempt to share meat with them, something they seem to enjoy but do not have readily at hand.

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I had to introduce them to the concept of a selfie. They seem to be embracing this idea

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The felines seem perennially curious, though they are not allowed in dwellings

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An egg shaped contraption I’m told is for cooking delicacies. I have yet to see it used

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This warrior demonstrates his skill before all.

Set your house in perfect order before you criticize the world
Assume that the person you are listening to might know something that you don't
Abandon Ideology
Be grateful in spite of your suffering

Kyle Clawson

pollinator

Posts: 56

Location: Provo, UT

I like...

posted 2 years ago

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Adventure log, day 3

Today I discovered my love of ice cream and computers has not led to a body suited for hard labor. Rather, I felt the effects of yesterday’s labor to such a degree that i could only labor with the natives for an hour or two this morning. After a semi-nap, some meat, and some carbohydrates supplied via the native delicacy “pie”, I felt rejuvenated enough to labor with the natives again in the afternoon.

In the morning we took the weapons of gardening and cleaned them up a bit. Keeping tools ready to go seems to be valued among this tribe.

In the afternoon, I helped patch up some fence work so the hostile deer would not attempt to encroach on the village proper. We utilized what local resources we could. Additionally, we felled a tree for use in the “hug-la-culcher” as a sort of ladder. We haven’t put that together yet, but I believe we’ll have ample time to do so soon.

In addition to this, I was invited to participate in a ritual called “tah ko toos tay “ in which we prepared a ceremonial meal and ate together. The villagers are allowed to bring community business up at this time. If a particular piece of business is challenged, a dual to the death ensues. The survivor then implements their policy. Though the thought of such an act fills me with morbid fascination, it seems most villagers opt out of this option.

We ended the meeting with some ceremonial eye scream, a delicious dish that resembles ice cream in the modern world

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Another warrior mends the fence to hold off the ravenous deer population

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The half giant discourses on the metaphysics of tah kos

Set your house in perfect order before you criticize the world
Assume that the person you are listening to might know something that you don't
Abandon Ideology
Be grateful in spite of your suffering

Kyle Clawson

pollinator

Posts: 56

Location: Provo, UT

I like...

posted 2 years ago

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Adventurer’s log, day 4

I’m too tired to stylize this today

We tried fixing the sawmill, but a part broke and now we’re waiting on a replacement. In the meantime, we chopped down some trees and then limbed them.

Grey and I worked on some stonework this afternoon. One of them is a stone step outside the red cabin that we barely finished. It is currently covered in sand, but it’ll look great after a spritz!

The tribe is great. Food is good. Etc etc

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Set your house in perfect order before you criticize the world
Assume that the person you are listening to might know something that you don't
Abandon Ideology
Be grateful in spite of your suffering

Kyle Clawson

pollinator

Posts: 56

Location: Provo, UT

I like...

posted 2 years ago

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Adventure log, day 5 and 6

The past couple days have been grueling. The natives have employed me in rebuilding their defenses against the dreaded deer. The task is essential if we want to survive the rest of the winter. Their legends tell of deer slipping through tiny holes and then wreaking havoc on whole villages. Luckily, putting up fences seems to calm their wrath.

We also organized some of the wood in the storage location known as the “bearm sheed”. Apparently if we do not keep it organized, a terrible spirit possesses the half
giant chieftain and a virgin must be sacrificed to appease it. I think I’m the only virgin here. These two facts being true I executed my task in haste.

The tribe has decided I may look after a plot of land and garden it after the way of my people. My people don’t have a specific way of gardening, so I thought I would put some rocks down to see if the dew of the morning might condense upon them. We shall see if this technique yields any fruit (or more likely, vegetables), after I plant seeds in a week or two.

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Set your house in perfect order before you criticize the world
Assume that the person you are listening to might know something that you don't
Abandon Ideology
Be grateful in spite of your suffering

Kyle Clawson

pollinator

Posts: 56

Location: Provo, UT

I like...

posted 2 years ago

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Adventure log, day 7. Today the villagers rest. So I took photos of their felines

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Set your house in perfect order before you criticize the world
Assume that the person you are listening to might know something that you don't
Abandon Ideology
Be grateful in spite of your suffering

Kyle Clawson

pollinator

Posts: 56

Location: Provo, UT

I like...

posted 2 years ago

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Adventure log, day 9

Today was the day we began gardening. The natives indicated which plots I am to attend to and then we began dispersing seeds. I believe in some time we will be harvesting pees and poh tay toes. I’m told one could mash them, or boil them, or even place them in a stew. I hope to experience such a delicacy.

The second part of this day entailed working on an abode—The Sole Arium, I believe. I get the impression the tribe uses this area as both a place of sun worship as well as a place to retire for the evening. In fact, it is where I’ve been retiring of late. We inserted some wooly form of rock in between planks of wood. Apparently, this ensures heat is retained within the abode. Genius! Such a clever people, these natives.

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Set your house in perfect order before you criticize the world
Assume that the person you are listening to might know something that you don't
Abandon Ideology
Be grateful in spite of your suffering

Kyle Clawson

pollinator

Posts: 56

Location: Provo, UT

I like...

posted 2 years ago

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Adventure log, day 10

We continued to garden today. This day we traveled to the tribe’s more distant village, to set up gardens there. I decided to attempt a more randomized approach to planting at this location. I’ve opted for a “grab and toss” variety of gardening, which is less about precision, and more about tossing. I have no idea if this will yield any success, but I look forward to seeing the result.

In order to reach the second location, I traveled with the natives via a strange vehicle. For some reason, the vehicle’s captain and co-captain sat far in front of me. I wonder if this is not a ceremonial vehicle we have co-opted on this occasion. I can only guess as to the great space between pilot and passenger. I believe I was either being treated as royalty or as a prisoner. Time will tell.

In the afternoon I continued to work on the Sole Arium with the young warrior. The insulation is quite irritating, but it has certainly made the nights more bearable

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I am either being treated as royalty or as a prisoner. I couldn’t get a straight answer

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I have placed these poe tay toes in a hole. I wonder if I will find more upon my return

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One of the native warriors continues to insulate the Sole Arium

Set your house in perfect order before you criticize the world
Assume that the person you are listening to might know something that you don't
Abandon Ideology
Be grateful in spite of your suffering

Kyle Clawson

pollinator

Posts: 56

Location: Provo, UT

I like...

posted 2 years ago

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Adventure log, day 11

We spent all of today up at the outer village. Today’s goal was to prepare for a well to be dug. We attempted to clear some trees and were somewhat successful. Unfortunately, it was my first time using a “chayn saw” and I may have made some mistakes. Or rather, I did make mistakes. Utilizing this foreign tool proved difficult and I was unable to fell the tree. Instead, I got the saw stuck in the tree. It took many of the warriors much time to discern how to get the saw un-stuck, but it was done.

A man from another tribe came and helped establish a well at the far village. This is a huge leap forward and will provide much in the way of prosperity to this people. Unfortunately, the man’s truck also got stuck. Again, it took much ingenuity from the village warriors, but we eventually un-stuck the truck.

To celebrate, we visited a nearby village and enjoyed local delicacies. An excellent end to the day

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Set your house in perfect order before you criticize the world
Assume that the person you are listening to might know something that you don't
Abandon Ideology
Be grateful in spite of your suffering

Hans Quistorff

gardener

Posts: 1908

Location: Longbranch, WA Mild wet winter dry climate change now hot summer

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posted 2 years ago

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I am either being treated as royalty or as a prisoner. I couldn’t get a straight answer

Actually slave cargo. The space in-between is for material cargo. Other tribes have invented a device called a wedge to pound into the saw cut, when the tree wants to lean back against the cut, to keep it from pinching the saw.

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Kyle the Second’s Bootcamp Experience *BRK*

Kyle the Second’s Bootcamp Experience BRK