Well, I'm a big fan of Joe Jenkins and the Humanure Handbook too, but I think the original question would not be served well by a simple bucket
compost toilet system.
The OP wants a composting toilet that will be acceptable to his wife, who is skeptical about the idea, and guests. He probably also has an issue that he needs to get his construction approved for residence. I think you should look into the various commercial composting toilets available. They take either more space or electricity or both, but some of them are designed in ways that will not alarm your wife and guests, and some of them may have been approved for residences in your area. You should research that.