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Tucker - aspidistra friend I wish I had

 
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Meet our new easy going green amigo: Tucker! A plant of little needs, Tucker mostly keeps to himself, although he is known for getting emotional during the National Anthem, he even knows the words off by heart. He told us he has a full scale version of the flag that he keeps tucked away between his leaves and only brings out for National Holidays. He keeps it perfectly folded thanks to a flag-folding tutorial that he found online. Tucker believes in freedom of speech...but only if you’re saying things that he’s okay with hearing.



What makes Tucker so special?
Okay so you wanted something big, something beautiful, without the hassle of having to care for it all the time. Meet Tucker! This Cast Iron Plant, or Aspidistra if that's your thing is an impressively tough plant that is super hard to kill - if you enjoy killing plants, don't buy a Cast Iron Plant. Tucker has been neglected all his life and knows all about self-care and self preservation. Go ahead and take a long vacation, Tucker doesn’t like vacations anyway, why vacation away from the greatest place in the world (aka your home)?! Tucker’s not fussed about how much light you give him, just don’t leave him in the glaring sun all day.



https://plantsome.ca/products/aspidistra-cast-iron-plant-xl

Great marketing!  

I don't know why, but I've become totally obsessed with getting an aspidistra since I read that page.

Do I need one?  No.

Would having one make my life better?  No.  okay, maybe a little.

Can I afford one?  Nope.

And yet...


 
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LOL! Clever marketing. Except that doesn't look like an aspidistra to me! Maybe a bromelaid?

Oh noes! Tucker has been kidnapped and replaced with an imposter!
 
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Looks like a snakeplant/ "mother in law's tongue," https://www.thespruce.com/snake-plant-care-overview-1902772

Other than the name, their pitch is all true about this plant.
 
Jane Mulberry
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I think you're right!
 
r ranson
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I wonder  if  that picture was too show off the box and how they ship?
 
r ranson
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let's try this



Do you think that's our chap?  
 
And now I present magical permaculture hypno cards. The idea is to give them to people that think all your permaculture babble is crazy talk. And be amazed as they apologize for the past derision, and beg you for your permaculture wisdom. If only there were some sort of consumer based event coming where you could have an excuse to slip them a deck ... richsoil.com/cards
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