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To everyone who can't 'Be Nice' at Christmas...

 
Mother Tree
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steward
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Hilarious! This advice might have warded off some particularly awful screaming and crying one Christmas years back. If only. Thanks for the fun, Burra!
 
steward
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Thank goodness. Somebody finally put the C back in X-mas.

 
master pollinator
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I've been very nice this year. Just a few minutes ago, I used a golf club to defend my friend's home from an intruder.

Here's what happened. --- https://permies.com/t/30833/md/Dale-home-security-scare-Knocked
 
steward
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The British own the C word . Somehow it flows with a Cockney accent . I can't even say it . I have to say " the C word " . This is due to the careless hurling of that word during a hangover after a night of drinking Tequila in Austin Tx . I suffered a dislocated jaw and had to drink soup for a week .
 
Dale Hodgins
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wayne stephen wrote:The British own the C word . Somehow it flows with a Cockney accent.



My brother used to put the C in Christmas every year. He'd do the same with Easter, Thanksgiving ... Then they broke up. It's much more peaceful now.

I'm not British and I don't have the accent. This hasn't impeded my mastery of the C word. Ask anyone in my circle if they know of someone who uses it with impunity, and my name comes up. Men are usually the target of my derision, but I spread it around. I use it as a noun, pro noun, verb, preposition, and an interjection. I've added prefixes and suffixes. The trick is to have a well thought out plan of attack that employs plenty of examples of how Tom has revealed that he's a silly C. I seldom use slang and am amongst the most knowledgeable and well spoken people that my listeners are likely to know. The trick is to use it sparingly, usually just once in any given exchange. It should be a show stopper. It should be so entertaining that people who arrived late ask for a retelling of the tale.

I think it has more impact when spoken in the Queen's English. We've all heard cockney comedians sling it about. No shock value. I'd prefer to hear it coming from Sir Richard, Sir Elton or Sir Mick. The more out of character the verbal assault, the funnier it is. That's why a video of a cute little kid cussing on YouTube gets attention, while the old guy who can't get his chainsaw started can say the same things and you never lose track about the subject of the video.

The idea that prudes should have some say in my self expression, is far more offensive than any word could be. To not use it freely would be to bend to the will of politically correct ninnies.(imagine music, "His truth is marching on" might fit) Live free, and don't let anyone cramp your style. Go forth grasshopper, expand your vocabulary and be not afraid.

EDIT --- And, don't forget to be nice. Wayne's comment got me a little sidetracked and I almost forgot the theme of this thread.
That's right, I'm blaming it on Wayne.
 
Burra Maluca
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Dale Hodgins wrote:

I think it has more impact when spoken in the Queen's English. We've all heard cockney comedians sling it about. No shock value. I'd prefer to hear it coming from Sir Richard, Sir Elton or Sir Mick. The more out of character the verbal assault, the funnier it is. That's why a video of a cute little kid cussing on YouTube gets attention, while the old guy who can't get his chainsaw started can say the same things and you never lose track about the subject of the video.
.



I believe Shakespeare himself used the word, albeit in a slightly disguised form. Malvolio in Twelfth Night made reference to his lady's C's, her U's 'n her T's, and how she thusly formed her great P's. At least, that was how my English teacher interpreted it. Though he wasn't actually English, he was Canadian. Which I'm beginning to think might explain quite a lot.

I don't believe Shakespeare saw fit to elaborate on whether or not said great P's were taken outside though...
 
Dale Hodgins
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My kids were completely unaware of my fondness for the C word until one day when one of them went into a tirade about a not too bright educator whom she was forced to endure for a semester. It turned out that she had a whole list of people who fit the term. Some of her friends were shocked by the vitriol dispensed by my friendly and quite popular daughter. I think she enjoys the shock value. Imagine that.
 
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