Feeling Stressed and Lacking Direction...

...and now I'm writing about it.

I've got approximately two hours and seventeen minutes before our farm family meeting.

Lately, these little farm meetings are becoming a bit more common, and for me - increasingly frustrating.

I'm frustrated today...lacking motivation to do the things I need to be doing on a Sunday - like folding laundry.

Which I'm actually going to do - then come back here and finish ranting.  

Hey Rob!

"Feeling Stressed and Lacking Direction" sounds like a name for my autobiography.

I'd think of something inspiring for you, but I've also got to run. I hope the family farm meeting is less frustrating today.

i have screen addiction..... and when that fully manifests.... i lacj the motivation to get stuff done.   i did a detox last week where i was not near nor using the more common culprits (TV. laptop. ipad).

after the 4th day i felt much better.   But .... with the weather still quite cold outside... i have slipped and already notice the tug that the various screens have on me.... and  sluggish-ness to get other stuff done.

Out of curiousity.... What are your "farm meetings"?  Who calls and or leads them?  What's their overall objective?

Peace

The laundry's been folded.  One hour and twenty four minutes remain.  

Strange...as I don't really understand my angst.

This is part of my frustration.  

I'm an aspiring farmer / homesteader and what have you.

Over the years, in trying to "do" this...I managed to go into debt.

I realized this wasn't good.  I corrected course.  I'm a changed man.

Moreover, I seem to have lost direction...

Rob Kaiser wrote:
I'm an aspiring farmer / homesteader and what have you.

Seems you answered your own question.... at least to a large part.   When we are passionate about doing something but reality(in some form or fashion) prevents us from doing that desired thing... it can be a bit soul crushing.

The really successful people somehow Re-asses... Re-assert.... Re-Plan and POWER through the obstacles and make "it" happen.  That might mean changing the original goal... compromising or whatever...   But finding a way to make it work for what they are desiring to be or do.

l am not one of those really successful people.  i have not accomplished my dream yet either... and it is depressing and frustrating and creates a malaise that makes it more hard to get things done.  l am currently trying to do all those "Re-" things and get back on a  path that i am comfortable with...  But i am guessing it will be a bit hard.   Hopefully you have or find some lRL people to support and assist you.  it aint easy to go it alone!

Peace

Rob, could this be a little touch of winter doldrums? The end of winter is always a drag for me. The weather is often wet, skies often grey, days are short and it's too early to get the garden going, but when I experience a nice bright sunny day with temps in the 60's, it's a great day, I feel good and I know this feeling I have has its days numbered. Every year when spring weather finally does start and I'm outside in it, my doldrums retreat until next January and February.

C. E. Rice wrote:i have screen addiction..... and when that fully manifests.... i lacj the motivation to get stuff done.   i did a detox last week where i was not near nor using the more common culprits (TV. laptop. ipad).

after the 4th day i felt much better.   But .... with the weather still quite cold outside... i have slipped and already notice the tug that the various screens have on me.... and  sluggish-ness to get other stuff done.

Out of curiousity.... What are your "farm meetings"?  Who calls and or leads them?  What's their overall objective?

Peace

I hear you on the screen addiction, it's easy these days.  A digital detox is a great thing...I'm glad my screen usage fluctuates with the season.  

Not ruling out cabin fever in addition to this as a contributing factor to the proverbial gears grinding.

Ah...meetings, yes.  They're wonderful.  My approach towards them has changed a bit over the years.

The objective of the recent meetings has been information sharing and information gathering.

James Freyr wrote:Rob, could this be a little touch of winter doldrums? The end of winter is always a drag for me. The weather is often wet, skies often grey, days are short and it's too early to get the garden going, but when I experience a nice bright sunny day with temps in the 60's, it's a great day, I feel good and I know this feeling I have has its days numbered. Every year when spring weather finally does start and I'm outside in it, my doldrums retreat until next January and February.

Absolutely it's the winter doldrums...but also a lack of the life WTFs.

I'm honestly having a hard time getting "settled in" to this life.

After spending so many years as a vagabond gypsy...this normalization of life is kind of haunting me.

After years without a plan, I'm realizing that the plan I made is changing, and always will.

However, the changes of said plan are a bit beyond my comprehension at times.  

Luckily I've got the next 12 months identified so it's really no big deal...

...but man, sometimes the gears get griding and I'm thinking 1000mph.

Literally feels like I'm insane sometimes.

C. E. Rice wrote:

Rob Kaiser wrote:
I'm an aspiring farmer / homesteader and what have you.

Seems you answered your own question.... at least to a large part.   When we are passionate about doing something but reality(in some form or fashion) prevents us from doing that desired thing... it can be a bit soul crushing.

The really successful people somehow Re-asses... Re-assert.... Re-Plan and POWER through the obstacles and make "it" happen.  That might mean changing the original goal... compromising or whatever...   But finding a way to make it work for what they are desiring to be or do.

l am not one of those really successful people.  i have not accomplished my dream yet either... and it is depressing and frustrating and creates a malaise that makes it more hard to get things done.  l am currently trying to do all those "Re-" things and get back on a  path that i am comfortable with...  But i am guessing it will be a bit hard.   Hopefully you have or find some lRL people to support and assist you.  it aint easy to go it alone!

Peace

What's depressing is that I could really reframe and write my own rah-rah story.

I've done some things that make it easy to do that but sometimes life just feels like a kick in the balls.

And like idiots sometimes we just sit around and wallow in our own misery for a little while.

This too shall pass, it always does - and there's always a reason in the big picture...right?

Sometimes, I find the energy and motivation comes from the dreaming and the planning. Once i achieve it, or even make progress toward it, it begins to feel like...a long slog, hard work, more difficult than imagined. I think we all hit the doldrums from time to time, or at least I hope I am not unique!  

When that happens, I try to renew my pleasure in the little things, returning to the simple things I really enjoy - a long walk in the woods, a few minutes in the hammock, listening to the creek, and yes, dreaming up and planning another challenging, difficult project I may never bring to fruition!

What brings a smile or feeling of contentment that can be done now, daily, anywhere?  

I began an involuntary gypsy life at birth ^.^  Being in one place for awhile is different, indeed.

When life feels like a kick in the balls, grab a stick and get swinging or have fun thinking about it :)  Or, breathe and self-soothe, and don't feel guilty for a skinny minute.  Fuck that kick and whatever invited it.  Life has already moved on and always calling, yeah?  

Kinda sounds like you've already got this down.  Maybe marking time until more of what you want to do can be done?

Write your rah rah story.  Or think about it.  Ponder positive potentials and possibilities.  

I'm not a bliss nanny.  Just stopped engaging with shadows that aren't useful when they show up.  

It's good you said what's what 'out loud'.  That's a jump start  right there.

"Feeling Stressed and Lacking Direction..."

This was me this time last year.  I am finally pulling out of it and I am fully accepting my new reality of how I need to do things going forward.  My husband I have had to scale back our homestead plans because my health took a major down turn years earlier than we were hoping.  It's all good.  Once we got past the grieving of my lost functionality we started talking about how can make our current life easier. The changes included decluttering our household, selling a rental property, automating the chicken chores as much as possible, not planting 1/3 of the garden, redesigning the annual garden, and simplifying our composting system.  It felt like we were doing so little and not moving forward.  

Then we had friends and family come to visit that hadn't been to the house in a couple of years. They were impressed and in awe of what we have done even if it was full of weeds and damaged plants.  It is so easy to get bogged down in the day to day stuff and feel like you are spinning your wheels.  It helps to be able to get a fresh perspective to see how far you have come.  

We are still decluttering, working simplifying everything we have already done, and only one big project a year.  We can't handle more than that are we now happy with that progress.  So many plans have changed and will continue to change and we roll with it all.  

When I get stressed, I stop what I am doing and come here to permies to unwind.  By the time I have read some great topic, I get lost and forgot what I was stressed about.

Hi Rob - something you said stood out to me i.e. 'I'm thinking 1000mph'.  Yup overthinking can be very unhealthy (if not overly neurotic!)

The good news being (as I'm sure you must know) that, with awareness, we can change gear!  Maybe spend some time relaxing with something you enjoy, e.g. music, pursuing an interest that gives you pleasure - whatever.  Being able to laugh/see the lighter side of life helps put things into perspective too.

It sounds like you are mostly sorted (with a plan) so is it just down to future worry?  Constant change can be liberating if we're flexible enough to adapt and can take you to more beneficial outcomes than you originally imagined!  (We can't always see the bigger picture, can we?)