How to get started on a diet and stay there?

Hi All,
I have had my fair share of chronic illness that would be able to get so much better so much faster if I could get on and stay on a diet. Specifically on a low-amylose diet, which is pretty much keto as well as avoiding root vegetables. The issue is getting started and staying there. I'm not as obese as some, but way more than I should be, to be healthy.

I have tried starting slowly. I have tried starting cold turkey. I have tried thinking about all the important reasons for me to be healthy. I understand all the of the reasons why I'm struggling, because I'm going through some pretty terrible stuff in my life right now which makes me binge eat and which makes me feel worse which makes me eat more... and it turns into this wonderful cycle. I'll get going and go well, when something new comes along, triggers me, and I'm back eating a whole box of cheezits or a huge bowl of ice cream. An addiction to sugar or the dopamine of eating when stressed, I'm not sure.

I have 6 children... I need to be healthy enough to have the energy to take care of them. Right now it is a struggle. How did you get started eating healthy? and more importantly, how in the world do you keep going?

Hey Matt,
it sounds like you have a good handle on why you need to do it, maybe you need to make things easier for you to succeed. One thing we have always done in my house is simply not have the stuff in the house. My husband was prediabetic and i was trying to lose weight, we decided we dont keep any of the things that are problematic for us in the house and that's that. Ten years later, it's practically law, lol. We eat ice cream and cheezits and soda and other things but don't stock them in the house, unless someone brings them over for a party.

I think also having an accountability buddy helps. Having to tell someone you need to start again is hard, and having someone to high-five you when you did something hard is awesome. This is hard business you have here, you deserve all the help you can get.

something else i wanted to add: sometimes the hardest thing is that big shove-off at the beginning: when you decide what you're going to eat instead of those cheezits, say chopped up carrots, and buying those instead and leaving the cheezits in the store. I know i personally feel a million different feels related to how badly i'm going to screw up, etc, one thing that helps me is to think of myself differently: I'm not an old lady looking stupid on the treadmill and never going to get in the shape i want to be in....instead, I'm a person who runs. I want to be a person who runs, so i think of myself that way.
You're not a person failing to lose weight, you're a person starting to take things by the horns and successfully make changes (or however you would like to see yourself). Repeat as needed!

Hi Tereza,
Unfortunately getting rid of all the "taboo" food is not an option right now. Some foster kids coming and going, which makes it nearly impossible to get rid of all that sort of thing.

But I like the idea of an accountability partner.

How about making a list of your favorite healthy foods and substituting those when you’re tempted to binge? Like steak or jerky? I agree about not bringing home anything on the “no” list. What’s worked for me is avoiding anything with added flavors that I’ve had a hard time maintaining control over. I mostly avoid shopping the middle aisles in grocery stores and go straight for *fresh food.* When I’m stressed out I take a nap or go to sleep early.

Matt McSpadden wrote:I have tried starting slowly. I have tried starting cold turkey. I have tried thinking about all the important reasons for me to be healthy. I understand all the of the reasons why I'm struggling, because I'm going through some pretty terrible stuff in my life right now which makes me binge eat and which makes me feel worse which makes me eat more... and it turns into this wonderful cycle. I'll get going and go well, when something new comes along, triggers me, and I'm back eating a whole box of cheezits or a huge bowl of ice cream. An addiction to sugar or the dopamine of eating when stressed, I'm not sure.

I resemble those remarks. I had a different addiction, but I experienced that need for dopamine and the downward cycle exactly the same way. I found a way out through Celebrate Recovery. Maybe Weight Watchers would be better for you. Either way, I found that accountability is so helpful to me. And now I have a group of men to tell about my troubles when troubles come.

Recovery is hard. But one of the hardest steps is walking into a group for the first time. Fortunately, it is as easy as walking.

Matt McSpadden wrote:Some foster kids coming and going, which makes it nearly impossible to get rid of all that sort of thing..

I hear you. Kids, especially kids at certain ages, make this harder.
I wonder, though, if you can find something very attractive to them that you quite simply just don't like, and buy that instead. lots of snack options out there..... I like ice cream but would rather eat dirt than rum raisin, for example, and once i ate a swiss-cheese flavored cheezit that tasted like something from a diaper..... I wonder if you have someone you can bounce these ideas off of? (I ask because my own kid is brilliant at this kind of stuff, sometimes i get blinders and it's helpful to have someone else look and give me an idea i'd never have come up with myself).

Where might you source an accountabili-buddy? would you prefer in person or online? i bet other folks would appreciate the same sort of thing, might not be too hard to come up with.

Ah and another thing. I have a paper calendar in my office where I make a note every day that I go running. If i didn't do that, I would probably invent reasons to not run when I'm supposed to, but that damn calendar looks at me every day. But I like to see the little notes too, I know the sweat that went into that little note and it makes me feel good about myself. I wonder if you could set a SMART goal for yourself and start racking up stars on the calendar that make you feel like you're getting somewhere.

(SMART: specific, measurable, achievable, realistic, time-defined: something realistic you can easily look at and say, did it or not, instead of "eat better" maybe "eat 90% the way i wanted to today" or "not eat ice cream except for on saturdays" or something like that. realistic, and also kind to yourself. I used to make educational plans for people using these criteria and they're great)

I have been following what is called intermittent fasting for six or so years now.
There are variations that can work for most any lifestyle.
I eat between 6am until 2 pm and that's that.  I didn't need to lose much weight but this was an easy sustainable way to lose pounds to where now I think my weight is less than I would have hoped for and still I shed a pound or so every few months...25# total.  It's slow but for me it's become a habit and I don't need to think about it anymore.

We don't have kids at home and cook everything from scratch so the good food part is pretty easy.
I think it might be a start though, no matter what you are eatting, just in order to cut calories and get the ball rolling towards weight loss.

This wikipedia article has a bit of info and there's a thread here at permies about different methods of fasting to lose weight.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Intermittent_fasting
https://permies.com/t/101105/Fasting-find-easier-eat-eat

When I fall off the low carb wagon (lots of times) I tell myself what I am going to eat when I get a craving for carbs.  I decide beforehand and stock up.  "I will eat as much bacon and eggs as it takes to stop me wanting cookies."  And I do it.  Even if I have to eat a dozen eggs and a pack of bacon in a day.  In fact I often have to stuff myself with low carb items before the cravings go.

Another thing that helps me is I've noticed a pattern in my cravings.  I'm busy at home or work all morning and afternoon and am not thinking about eating.  In fact, I often do intermittent fasting by skipping breakfast and just drinking water or tea in the morning until or even after lunchtime.  But after dinner, usually an hour or two after, I'm no longer busy;  I'm sat down with my laptop or book and suddenly I'm craving carbs.  But as I have come to expect it, I also know what to do:  get up and fry some eggs and bacon  

For what it's worth, it usually takes me a full two weeks of eating strict low carb before the cravings stop.  Then it's plain sailing again.

(Edited for clarity)

@Tereza,
More good stuff :), I like the idea of trying to get snacks they like and I don't. No idea about an accountability buddy. Never thought about online, just figured I would find someone in my circle. Some of those programs do have apps and things. Might not hurt to look into.

@Judith,
I have looked into intermittent fasting. Thanks. I like the sound of it, and I have seen people get very good results with it. Unfortunately I have supplements that I need to take right now, that need to be spaced out, and which need to be taken with food... so the longest I could fast for would be 12 hours. Still better than I'm doing right now with late-night snacks... but not the 14-18 hours that I think could really help.

Keep these ideas coming. I don't want people to think it is impossible. Three or 4 years ago, I was too tired to walk across the room and turn off the light on my way to bed. Now I get to the gym 1-2 times a week. It's possible, but I'm about as far as I can possibly get without getting food under control. Hence this post to get some ideas to get over the next hurdle.

@G
That is another good one. Stock up on stuff I can eat. Better to be full of bacon and eggs than cheezeits.

I have never stuck with a diet.

I feel best when I have lots of colors and flavors and textures on one plate. A salad with homemade dressing, pickles, some sort of protein, a bowl of rice or noodles. One portion is always enough when it is varied. If it's plain, or all one color, then I overeat.

I suspect that self control is not so much an ability to resist things you want as it is knowing yourself well enough to avoid the situation altogether. 😉

I found using a calorie-tracking app to be very effective. The one I like the best is called Cronometer, and it’s free unless you want some more advanced features. For me, tedious tracking is the ONLY way if just doing straight calorie-reduction, because my internal “satiety meter” is not a good indicator for how many calories I’ve consumed.

With straight calorie-reduction (versus more extreme eliminations like keto), you really should only cut at a pace of 1 to 2 lbs per week, otherwise the hunger can get bad. It can be useful to do intermittent fasting (IF), which mostly means eating fewer times a day, like only after a certain time of the day (no eating until 3 PM). That way, you get to eat a lot and feel stuffed, but your daily intake remains low. It also helps reduce your hunger pangs, since your body tends to acclimate to an eating schedule.

Finally, going higher on fats and protein, ultimately almost to the exclusion of carbs (ketogenic) can be effective—for some people—at reducing hunger/cravings and improving energy while dieting. However, it can require more discipline and can feel anti-social, sometimes, because you’re completely excluding huge categories of food.

Best of luck on this journey! You’re doing a great thing for yourself.

Matt,
Another thought that might be important is to use whatever way of eating that fits your lifestyle.  There are lots of ways to lose weight but keeping it off is more difficult if it's not an easily maintainable way to eat.

What I like about intermittent fasting is that it helps me focus on things other than my next meal or snack when I've hit the end of my 8 hour eating period.
And it's flexible enough to fit most lifestyles....even 12 hours with no food could benifit our health and can be arranged so much of that is sleeping anyway.

As to supplements that must be taken with food, I think that can be a piece of fruit or a few crackers and needn't be a whole meal.

Great topic my friend! Most people have this issue. My personal experience with weight loss and healthier eating started in the gym. I know the kitchen is most of the battle but when you start to feel less like a piece of shit ( that was my motivation) you eat better. I lost 50lbs and then became a personal trainer. So I had to workout haha. I still battle food ALL the time and am not consistent. I have found The 4 Hour Body diet by Tim Ferris is pretty legit. This is what I’m currently doing. This one is simple and you get one cheat day a week! Check it out.
Also making yourself stop to evaluate why you are running to the fridge. Drink some water first  and see what happens in 30 minutes. Still hungry? Grab a snack. Im an emotional eater as well. It gets easier when you learn to love cooking healthy meals and working out is key.