Replacing the Urge to Buy

Maybe it's Pavlovian training from my cultural upbringing, but I get a jolt of dopamine whenever I make a purchase. It feels like I've done Something Productive, when I have not, in fact, produced anything.

When I get the wanna-buy itch, I am going to sit directly in front of my latest constructive project, and spend 5 minutes on it ("Start", i.o.w.). and train myself reflexively to be a producer instead of a consumer. (I have a Psychology degree, so I sure had better be able to figure out how to rewire my own brain! )

When I find myself in that pattern,  I lock down to one well planned shopping trip a month.  30 days of self discipline seems to change my behavior.

I used to get my jolt at thrift stores. Now I get my jolt at the take-it-or-leave-it and metal recycling bins at the recycling centre. Either way, it's made sweeter by the thrill of the hunt. Yesterday I got a bunch of heavy duty pulley sets from a bowflex machine; and I have a project that needs them.

I also have a pretty good collection of everyday wear/carry objects from hats and gloves to knives/leathermans/pruning shears. I can switch up all my gear and everything is "new" to me. It scratches that itch.

One trick regarding impulse buys is to take an item home but not open or use it for a day or two. Think of it as a cooling off period. If I really don't need it, it gets returned, no hassles because it's unopened, and I get the thrill of getting my money back. This is big-box store stuff, so they don't care and neither do I. Possibly a slippery slope for some, but it works for me.

Hi,  When I "see" or want something I generally write it down on a list. Since I live a ways from the city I usually have a few days where the list sits on the table. After getting to the city I forgot the list. Came home, looked at the list and thought I don't want to buy that much work. Then, I wrote a couple of things down on a new list and threw the old one away.

I understand "Buyers Urge", I mean I was wed to a woman who belonged to (3) shoe of the month clubs,...

And even if that truth was kind of funny, I am sympathetic to the feeling of providing for your family, even if it is overspending of monies. But in my life, I have always had the mindset that it is always best to "do as much as you can for yourself".

A case in point may be in making books. You can buy a whole slew of machines the do the bookbinding for you. I studied them, and watched youtube, and finally made my own little bookmaking machine out of plywood. It was slow, but I did make some 60 books or so with it.

I did just buy a machine. It costs $650 and was quite a purchase but makes 250 books an hour. I also waited 2 years to get it.

So while it may seem like I gave into the urge, the reality was it was a very calculated purchase. It was a lot of money, but after two years I decided it was worth it to get, and I think that is okay.

I am... not great at this.

But a thing that I have been doing for a few months is to track everything that comes into the house (free or paid-for, not counting consumables).  I've been counting "A Thing A Day" out for years for decluttering purposes, and while my clutter is better, it's not showing the progress recently that ATAD should.  Tracking A Thing In (ATI) shows me why.  Yikes!

I just got back from my mom's place, where she's decluttering (and finally let me call junk guys for much of the house, hallelujah) and after unpacking the fun stuff from her house, I have already brought ATI for almost every day in January.  Let me tell you, I really want A Specific Thing right now, but I look at the list and can't quite pull the trigger.

So maybe that might help for you?

To reply to myself, I was very good and did not buy The Specific Thing (yet).  And I pondered the pergola that I want and will need the bf's help to create, and decided that what I really want is strong vertical supports to plant all the vines I want, plus maybe to use the top of one to attach a tarp I already own.  So then I spent far too long looking at metal obelisks on Amazon.  Then I looked at buying long rebar from local hardware stores to make some tall enough.  Then I decided to be good and make some temporary ones from the long sticks I've harvested over the years.  So far, so good.

Then I bought (mumble) euros worth of seeds from my favorite seller.  They're consumable so they don't count.  Bah.

I set a goal to save towards an object and then record when I fail to go through with an urge, or even save with a discount.
I usually pick something useful to save for, another motorcycle etc.
When I have literally have the cash I buy it and set another goal.