Ahh for the love of dog—Gracie

Feeling a little bit sentimental here.  I just found out with the hour that my beloved dog Gracie has an aggressive cancer and only has a short time left with us.

Somehow I think it’s appropriate that we are finding this out during Thanksgiving as I am extremely thankful for the thirteen years I have had with Gracie.

Gracie came to us when my kids—5 and 9—were conspiring to get a dog.  I knew that they wanted one, but I knew that I was going to be the one taking care of her.  At the time, all I could see was another responsibility piled up on my plate—I already taught full time, I was in graduate school, my insomnia was consuming my life and all I needed was one more responsibility.  But I also knew that the instant we adopted her that we would fall in love with her.

So we went off to the local shelter—St. Francis Animal Hospital—and there my youngest daughter, 5, fell head over heels for a little black lab mix puppy that had just been dropped off with the rest of her litter at about 6 weeks old.  The two were inseparable.  And before long, my wife was watching the two of them play and just realized that the name had to be Gracie.  She asked me and I said yes, it had to be.

Gracie was instantly a part of our family.  My youngest daughter doted on her for the first couple of months, but of course, due to puppies explosive growth, before long, Gracie was helping me raise my daughter.  Gracie watched over our land from our porch.  Anyone who dared to turn down our driveway would get an earful—and then a lick!  Gracie was all full of love and compassion for just about anyone.  

For me she played an especially important, helpful role.  Gracie entered my life as my insomnia was consuming my life.  Before too long, I would have to go on disability—the most humiliating experience of my life.  There I sat, all day, feeling like the world was passing me by while I sat all alone.  Except that I wasn’t alone—I had Gracie.  I would stare Gracie eye-to-eye, the bridge of her nose pressed against the bridge of my nose.  At first, Gracie hated this—it was unnatural, a threat and she growled defensively.  I continued to stare into her eyes as she growled an after a few moments, her eyes relaxed, she blinked and gulped, realizing that I was no threat, only her close companion.  After that point, when Gracie came to me whenever I got back home, she would approach me, drop her nose but look up with her eyes, wanting me to look at her nose-to-nose, eye-to-eye.

She has slowed down and we knew that she couldn’t go on forever.  About a month ago she got listless & stopped eating like she usually did.  Today I learned that she has an aggressive cancer and only has a short time to live.  I am strangely? Ironically? Appropriately? Pleased that this is happening over Thanksgiving.  For this Thanksgiving I will be eternally thankful for all of the love and companionship that Gracie added to my family and our lives for the last 13 years.  It is a sentimental, bittersweet to be certain, but Gracie was nothing but a blessing to myself and everyone who ever knew her.  We certainly will feel her loss, but what a wonderful dog—temporary family member she was.

Gracie made it through Thanksgiving and I speak for everyone when I say that I was thankful for 13 years with Gracie—a true companion of there ever was.  Gracie was in fairly decent shape, all things considered.

She doesn’t eat much, and she is very weak.  Her walks are both shorter and longer.  They are about 1/2 the distance but they take a long, long time. That’s fine this week—we are all off work & school. But there won’t be that much time tomorrow.

My wife was looking up the cancer Gracie has and in The process started to cry (but, for the record, my wife cries at almost anything for any reason).  It turns out that the cancer Gracie has will typically cause death by sudden bleeding out.  In doing so, she will die while feel like she is choking, suffocating.  We decided that we will have her put down, but the soonest is Wednesday.

I mentioned this to a handful of people, including my neighbor who mentioned that he hoped that he would get to see her again.  I thought that he would easily, but this morning she did not look well.  She looked like she was in pain and my wife had to carry her downstairs—I couldn’t really get her to walk.  I texted my neighbor and long story short, he said that he be over in about an hour.  True to his word, he and his wife were over, came inside to my surprise, got down on his knees, laid down on the floor and put his arm around Gracie.  My neighbor has some flexibility issues, severely limiting his ability to get down on the floor.  And while he is a very friendly, nice person to me, he is not what would be what I describe as soft, sentimental person.

So imagine my surprise when this great big tough guy laying on my floor then stared to to tear up and cry!  His wife of course told him (so very calmly) to not cry.  That set off my wife and soon everyone was crying.  

Such is the impact that Gracie has on virtually everyone she meets.  She is the ultimate big softie of a dog and infects everyone she meets with kindness.


Eric

Eric, it's a hard thing, I know, for I have done it many times in my long life.  I hope this helps you and your family, Gracie will be waiting for you in the Summerlands, where she can run and sniff out new scents all day long.

Stay strong and may you find Peace in this final act of love for Gracie!!

Heddwch

Oh, big hugs for you and Gracie! Our first dog Douglas was a lab-collie cross and he was such a sweetheart too. They are with us for such short lifetimes, and give so much love. I hope she goes peacefully.

Deane, Nancy,

Thanks,  it’s good to be able to share this.  Even though I knew that it’s been coming for a while, it’s still hard to hear when the time comes.

I was very reluctant to get a dog in part because a dog I had (my parents had, but I was in college) died not all that long before.  Somehow it was too soon, and no dog could possibly make up for Inga (a Norwegian Elkhound).  She, too, was a truly special dog, and I just knew that there was no way that Gracie would ever be Inga.  

And that was so true—she was Gracie, not an imitation of Inga but an amazingly special dog in her own right.  

And Gracie came at the perfect time for me—my insomnia put me into disability and I was home alone with her.  She was the companion I needed exactly when I was absolutely isolated.  I felt a little guilty when I went back to school as I was leaving my most-loyal companion—for hours.




Sorry, I just have a few rambling thoughts on my mind…..




Eric

If you are like many families at this time of year then maybe try feeding her turkey (leftovers, or otherwise) which is often the perfect food for sick dogs. Our lab who a few years ago died with cancer, would only eat turkey while he was sick.

And consolations, I know how it feels!

Sympathies to you Eric.  Yes, they become such a part of the family and are so hard to let go of.  Some solace:  You gave a shelter pet a great life and at 13 years, a long one for her size at that. Very understanding of the grief at their passing and support sent to you and your wife.

I, too am dealing with a senior dog,  Dementia mostly ..

Picking up poop in the house and making her food taste better.

I posted somewhere about a product that i am giving her that makes the qualify of life better.  I might need that some day ...

We let our senior dog go last year, he was a 14 yr 6m old Brittany, Labrador, springer spaniel cross who had been suffering from severe arthritis and canine dementia.

He still had a good appetite and enjoyed a gentle daily walk but had lost control of his bowels so we were picking up poop inside the house for the last 6m of his life.

He was on monthly injections of synovan and non steroid pain relief which were no longer as effective towards the end.

We came to the decision to let him go whilst he still had a relatively good quality of life and we still miss him every day.

I still cry over his loss but try to remember all the good times we shared, we have had dogs throughout our 38 years of marriage and hope that I will be allowed to die with dignity when my time comes.

It is always better to let them go too soon than to leave it too late. My heart goes out to you, our pets give us such unconditional love.

I'm so sorry Eric. I hope you can give Gracie a couple of great last days and spend good time together.

We were just remembering the same situation in our house - I had to do the same with my old boy last year, who at 14 had a good last year with a new little brother but then his bones and his spine caught up with him. I also had to choose a day (my vet comes to my home, but had to schedule a week out) and I agonized over when to do it. He'd have good days and bad days with hind end paralysis, arthritis, and then toward the end diabetes and heart stuff.
The vet and I decided on a day and we had a week of "good days", even though he couldn't do much- i'd let him sit on the grass in front of my house and sniff, and cast threatening looks at the neighbor dogs (even if he couldn't do much beyond that), skipped his kibble and made soup out of our food for him. The day before, was so energetic and I almost called to reschedule, and spent the whole day second-guessing myself. The next day Nacho couldn't get up, and it was clearly time. He was also my daughter's dog, grew up with her, and I made sure she was there too. It was probably one of the hardest things I've ever done. He was definitely one of those "once in a lifetime" dogs that I don't expect to ever see the likes of again.

Gracie was lucky to have you during her life, and to make sure she doesn't suffer more than she has to now. Take care of yourself too now, as you obviously know she's going to leave a big hole in your heart for a while that will sneak up on you when you least expect it.

Anne,

Gracie too, is reluctant to eat.  Nothing piques her interest.  We have tried just about everything.  I scramble eggs for her.  We get chicken for her.  We get pasta for her--she loved pasta!  But to no avail.  She has lost a little over 10 pounds--from 65lbs to 55lbs.  And I can feel that she is just down to bones in her hips.

But Tereza, everyone, at this time, I am reminded of all the wonderful times and joy that Gracie brought us, so this is not really a time of sorrow.  True, of course I will miss her, but for Thanksgiving I declared that I was thankful for 13 years of Gracie!

But thanks for your sympathies nonetheless.

Eric

Its good to have neighbors,

I have a neighbor who recently acquired a mini-excavator through an estate sale.  And it is the mini-est of mini excavators, but it will still dig a hole!

I would normally just go and dig the grave for Gracie myself, but my back problems have been severe enough that digging a hole in the earth is exactly the type of asymmetrical movement that will radically throw my back out of whack (a technical term).  So I asked/explained my situation and my neighbor is checking to make certain that everything is in working order.

I am enormously thankful for the help that I have had from all of my neighbors.  This is but one obvious example.


Eric

Deane,

You mentioned Gracie in the Summerlands, and I thank you for the well-wish and the sentiment.

But for Gracie, maybe the Winterlands is appropriate?  I think that Gracie's favorite weather phenomenon was snowfall.  Just last winter, I went out to clear snow from neighbor's driveways--Gracie broke trail for me the entire way!  Wherever I went, Gracie was about 20' ahead of me!  She just loved snow!


Eric

Today will be Gracie's last full day.

And it snowed!  What a fitting end to Gracie's life--she got to go out and take her walk in the snow.  She even seemed to have a bit more energy than usual.  I was so happy for her.


Eric

Maybe someone can help me.  I am trying to make a song for Gracie--it is a parody of the song Kickstart My Heart by Motley Crue.  But imagine "Kickstart My Dog" instead!

I have a copy of the lyrics that I wrote--think of something like a Weird Al style parody of a dog running.

I am trying to get these lyrics into the song sounding like the voice not of my own, but of real Motley Crue vocals.  I had a student suggest an AI for me, but I can only get so far.


Anyone have any ideas?

In the other musical traditions, to make a voice sound more powerful, you would add more voices in harmony onto it. Singing with other family members? I think that parallel fourths or fifths could invoke a heavy metal-esque atmosphere, but other intervals can work too, much of it is the affect of the voice.

Or possibly doubling the melody line on another instrument. You could practice a more metal-type vocal style too.

It’s really good to have neighbors.

So the borrowed excavator didn’t work out for technical reasons, but the help came anyway.

But first, my extremely helpful neighbor texted me to head right over to his workshop as soon as I got home.  I did and what did I see?—he was building a casket for Gracie!  I had already told him that a cardboard box was fine, be he said that he thought about it and decided that it was not good enough for “his” dog!  He lined the casket with a piece of rug that his two dogs use to lay upon—so Gracie doesn’t get lonely!  I am not sure that I have words for his level of sentimentality, but I certainly am greatly.

Then we headed out to dig the hole, which we were now starting by 5:00 and it was dark and I still wanted to have some time left over to spend with Gracie that night (though, true to form, Gracie was irresistibly attracted to what we were doing and had no be involved so my wife put her out on her line so she could watch!).  We dug by hand, we used tractor buckets.  It was slow going, it was messy and muddy.  We eventually dug below the layer of wet clay and struck bone dry, hard, almost brittle clay.  Almost nothing would penetrate.  I gave the order that we had to quit.  My back was shot.  And I wanted to see my dog.

I went inside, my back a train wreck, looking for whatever meds or remedies would help.  I played/petted, held Gracie for the last night.  I did a load of laundry of almost everything I was wearing as it was loaded with clay.  We went to bed, resting assured that my neighbor would go and rent a small backhoe to finish the job tomorrow (today).

I attached pictures of the casket.



Eric

And now she has passed.

May Gracie run strong and free in the realm of everlasting love.
My condolences to you and your family
❤️☮️❤️
Andi

Eric Hanson wrote:Today will be Gracie's last full day.

Sorry to hear this... 12/12/2025 was our the last day for Trouble.

Dear hubby dug the hole where the original foundation for our house was to go be so the dirt wasn't full of rocks.

We are waiting on a headstone and butterflies ornaments, like on wreaths at the White House this year.

Thanks Anne, and my condolences to you.

We buried Gracie under the canopy of a quartet of trees.  When she sat on her porch, she always looked out on these trees--they were on the edge of *her* yard and marked the boundary of the field area--a place where she loved to go and run wild.  Even better, the trees just grew up volunteer--I never planted them, I just did not mow them.  It will be nice and shady in the summer--a perfect place for her to rest.

I have a neighbor who is also a sub at school--and I consider her to be my personal sub!  She has a business on the side involving pottery.  I asked if she could make a headstone with Gracie's face on it and she thought it was a wonderful idea and enthusiastically agreed.



Eric