posted 1 hour ago
I see it on here a lot - really interesting seemingly good people searching for a mate but want their new partner to join them on their land. I've seen some people looking for years now. I want this myself. Does this mean love is less important than place? Those of us on Permies are different than most, and mostly live in rural areas, so there are just fewer potential partners around us. So people post here, in the hope they will find someone. And the thing is, I think likely there ARE great matches on here, but if no one moves it won't work.
Clearly our connection to land matters too, and the work we've already put in, or possibly our connection to community or family in the area. Some of us have children, who are connected to our land too, or have another parent in the area. That gets tricky. Those of us over 40 are more likely to be established where we are.
Partly, love is a gamble - what if you meet your person and you give up your land to go to theirs and then it doesn't work out? That's a real outcome. But love and life choices are always a gamble. Really, love isn't possible anyway if you aren't willing to put yourself out there, to make sacrifices of some kind.
Maybe some of you have a deeper faith/knowing/intuition that the person is coming, you just need to be patient. Maybe they are. Maybe you're just optimistic. Or maybe love just really isn't as important to you.
For me, I am happy with the life that I have, but love feels very important, so I am not sure how to solve this riddle. For now, I try to put myself out there in small ways, and keep hoping.
So here's the question (my 11 and 17 yr old children love to ask "would you rather" questions): If you knew there was no way you could end up with both (love AND your land) Would you rather live the rest of your life on your current land, with no partner, or move somewhere else and have love?
1
