Finger nails.

Ok, so don’t get mad…. Don’t blast me.

But I have artificial nails. I know! The toxins can be absorbed into my body through my nails and the poor manicurist breathing in the dust all day every day. Ugh. I feel guilty.

But my real nails are paper thin, no matter what vitamins I take, what oils I rub in them, no matter how healthy my diet is.

And I work hard. I’m a horticulturist. My real nails get worn away at work. My fingers and nails are crisscrossed with cracks and callouses and have ingrained dirt that won’t soak out.

I know I’m vain. Is this internalised misogyny?

We are supposed to look “aspirational” at my work which includes unspoken standards for personal grooming and my real nails don’t cut it. (I know, it’s a stupid catch 22. my job is the reason my hands are tradie hands, but there’s also the expectation of cleanliness and grooming at all times.)

I want to break the habit, and save my $$ but I just…. I’m too vain.

Is there someone who has broken away from artificial nails? And can tell me what they did to emotionally/psychologically disconnect from feeling as if you are gross and just not feminine, if you have flaky, chipped, stubby nails?

Maybe not to helpful, but I find that gloves save my nails and hands from looking like sandpaper.

How about having short nails put on so you get used to what real nails look like but still get the good smooth look of the fake ones? You could also try one of the many strengthening nail varnishes, I do that when a nail half breaks and I need to hold it together until it grows out a bit.

Personaly so long as mine are not to dirty I don't mind what they look like, and when they get really bad then I wear them as a badge of pride. Working hands not those soft office hands over there.

Just to clarify, they are very short. Just a couple of mm above my fingertips. Not flashy in any way. If you didn’t know, you might just think I have normal painted nails. I can’t grow my own natural nails past my nail bed, not exaggerating.

I get logically, the idea that working hands are honest hands.

Somehow I’ve internalized that neat clean finger nails mean something about your character.

Got a lot of soul searching to do.

You do what you need to do.

I have never considered using fake nails (or even nail polish) but let's be honest, I have at times done some other expensive grooming habit that you would consider unnecessary. Or I've willingly had nasty chemical exposure sometimes for something that in my opinion in the moment seems necessary. We all have our own habits and needs, and your work situation seems to demand hand appearance that is not quite possible given the work they demand. You've found a solution that works for you and you're mostly happy with it. Good for you!

I'd reiterate the gloves suggestion but I suspect since you're a professional doing garden work all day, you already use a variety of gloves for different kinds of work and still have this problem. Or maybe the appearance standards don't allow gloves?

What Rebecca said.

Also:

I sometimes get fake nails because I pick at my fingertips until I bleed, and the bluntness of artificial nails impedes that.   You gotta do what you gotta do.

For a cheaper and possibly less toxic alternative, have you considered the "press-on" nails sold in drugstores?*  They're pretty good now**.  

Advantage:  Cheaper, probably less overall time involved
Disadvantage:  Learning curve for possibly less perfect effect, miss the experience of being pampered by someone else.

*Don't buy the actual press-on ones - those pop off immediately.  Buy the ones with actual glue.

**note to self - I've been avoiding the manicurist since lockdown, I should take my own advice and order some myself.  You don't want to imagine the condition of my fingertips.

If I were in this situation I would paint my real nails with a really pale color something to like actual nail color.

I love short nails!

I have never been to a manicurist. I may have tried fake nails that you bought at the store when I was a kid.

When I started my career I read that as a professional, the business professionals looked at your fingernails as a way to judge your work performance.  I don't know if this were true, though it was hinted that those with long nails did not perform as well as those with short nails.

I love seeing all the pictures here on the forum of folks with dirty fingernails.  That's permaculture in the best way!

I found that my fingernails got stronger while I was consuming 1/4 tsp of apple cider vinegar in a glass of water for the potassium. I can't compare my results to the fake nails. For me, the whole nail painting thing seemed too fussy and stinky to mess with.

My struggle is with the fiend called sugar.

Morfydd St. Clair wrote:
I sometimes get fake nails because... You gotta do what you gotta do.

Good for you! I also keep my (short) nails painted because it stops me from picking (at the suggestion of my doctor, and it worked much better than anything else I've tried). It totally clashes with my personality, and I feel ludicrous working with power tools or in the garden... it's smelly, chemically, and just another thing to keep up with, but it stops me from having the open wounds I've had on my fingers since I was a kid. Again, sometimes needs must.

I asked my resident cosmetics expert (my kid), and she said if you've been doing fake nails you might have created a vicious cycle- they tend to make the nails even thinner and more fragile (and she's always trying supplements and etc for her own thin and weird nails, for years, with little success). The suggestion is to maybe try using a base coat and then gel polish, which is thicker and lasts longer, but won't keep destroying your nails like the acrylic glue, and then see how it goes, one step at a time.
I would also add using a strong moisturizer on your hands after scrubbing out all the dirt. I notice when I apply salve (bag balm, heavy eucerin, etc) regularly my nails grow more.

Edited to add: I hear you about the dirt and "character" (and I don't get these people who are like "just scratch a bar of soap before you go into the garden"..... I could clean my nails 10 times a day and they'd still have dirt under them). But it goes with the calluses, the baking burns, the scars, that are part and parcel of the lifestyle I love. My husband is a mechanic, and his hands are even worse, but that's totally okay-- image standards that don't match with the actual work you do are not helping here.

My wife started getting the fake fingernails when we had a bit of money but as others have said, her real fingernails ended up thin, broken and cracked.  She had to let them grow out naturally but with liberal coats of the nail polish.  The main thing with any protective coatings for fingernails is not to use any coating that has formaldehyde in it as while it will be good in the short term, it causes the nails to become extremely brittle and can discolour them.  Plus it is toxic.  It is in short, a preservative used for preserving bodies.   There are a couple of ways forward. The first one is to use something that is tried and true such as Hard as Nails Hardener.  It has been around for over 60 years.  It is about $3.50 for a bottle so will not break the bank [ https://www.sallyhansen.com/en-au/nail-care/nail-care/hard-as-nails }

The other way is to go a bit more natural.  Here is one of the web links to a more natural alternative using garlic, lemon and olive oil:  https://steptohealth.com/make-homemade-nail-hardener/

To help the hands, we use a bees wax based protective cream  that we make when we get a bit of wax.    For your hands it is probably better to use the tea as is without steeping it.  Melt the wax but do not heat it up too much, add some honey, olive oil or a good fruit oil such as avocado that is high in omega fatty acids and vitamins.  Add enough oil to ensure that the protective cream remains soft once cooled,  The camomile is a gentle exfoliant as well as soothing.  Use it before during and after work.  I have put a similar recipe out on another forum   https://permies.com/t/40/56191/personal-care/purity/moisturiser-sensitive-skin

Note on the links:  Each is an example of the products available and a start to find a solution.  

When I was a kid, the thing to do to make your nail strong and beautiful was to eat or drink gelatin.  My memory says it was to drink gelatin though either way would work.