If not today, then when

Celebrating 60 years in January.  I’ve had many life experiences… I have jumped from airplanes while in the US Army Cavalry.  I’ve patrolled the East/West German border.  I’ve been an assistant Dean for the University of California, and managed to retired as the proudest kindergarten teacher ever.  I’ve helped build and lead a charter high school for rehabilitating gang youth in LA County.  Together with my partner, of 28 years, raised twin daughters and a son.  The youngest of seven siblings separated in age by a year each.  Born and raised in San Diego, CA (pacific beach).  Student body President of my high school class, tennis/track and field team member.  Boys State California attendee, elected State senator with the honor of meeting with Gov. Jerry Brown.  I have a bachelor degree in Public Administration with double minor in Mexican-American studies, and Business Mgt.   Masters of Science in Education Psychology. Three year degree in Counseling/Student Development in higher education.  A separate multiple subjects teaching credential, and 4/5 finished with PhD in education law…. Fraternity member, and regional advisor since 1990.  Member of the American Legion.

And I need your help

I need OUT…. Literally and figuratively.  My relationship is over, children are grown.  I can’t breathe in this city - never could!  I came here nearly 30 years ago - the things we do for love…. I can hear the obnoxious sound of this city in my sleep.

Never been to LA before - never intended to - EVER!  As a San Diegan LA was taboo, and “foreign”

I dreamed of horses, and barns.  Growing crops like strawberries, or watermelon.  I wanted to sleep outside, and preferred animals to people.  I built forts as a kid, and wanted to build my house out of adobe.  I wanted fewer choices in clothing- if any at all.  Never REALLY liked shoes - although I collected them like a hoarder.  

I’ve been retired for a year.  Floundering.  Thought of buying property in Costa Rica… thought of desert SW…. But right now - I’m stuck. I’m hanging on - in a place that feels more and more like prison.  

I’m NOT looking for a handout - just a chance to spend next season working with my hands, outside - the farther away from the city - the better.  

I have limited resources but an abundance of energy and enthusiasm.  I need an opportunity to withdraw for awhile…. I need something off grid…. Where I can be helpful  

Paul's Sepper Program to visit the lab as a guest. He also offers a few different opportunities for longer term stay such as Boots and Ants.

Alternatively you could do WWOOF or something similar to just check things out and see if traditional farming is your thing.

Good luck in your life explorations!

Wow, sounds like you've had quite a life.

And I agree with Ezra. Come on over here and be a SEPPer for a while. The winter is an interesting time to be here. If you hang around long enough with us, you can help with planting in the Spring.

Failing that, I've crossed paths with a few WWOOFers in the same age range as you and they've found it instructive and rewarding. I say get'cher arse over here to Wheaton Labs, or WWOOF it to figure out what climate/terrain/activity level suits you best.

It sounds like its your time to explore what you really want and what is right for you in this new chapter of your life.  I agree that the above suggestions are good ones, if you do WWOOF then you could get started on some farms in parts of the U.S. where farming goes on all year 'round, where you can get things going sooner rather than waiting for northern planting season.  It does sound like you'd like Wheaton Labs, people seem to have a lot of fun and work hard over there, but as specified above you can camp and pay a small amount of rent, and do as much, or as little, work as you want, though I bet you'll be wanting to dig in (no pun intended) and start growing things, but winter is hard in Montana.  You have options and the world can open itself for you again.

Hi Kelly,
I have some off-grid property in southern. Oregon, just off of I-5. If that’s an area you’re interested in, check out some of my posts and reach out if you’d like.
Good luck getting out,
Leaf

I feel you. After 35 years in tech, I retired and left the bay area with a new wife. We bought 72 acres to start our offgrid homesteading dream. Unfortunately, I learned her dream was watching off grid life on TV and not actually living it. The two are not the same. She was gone in a month and hoped right to another man. So much for love 🤷‍♂️. It’s been a wild ride. I’ve survived and grown so much. But I have not achieved 10% of what I thought I would have by now. I’m also getting exhausted. I think much of my energy and passion were a trauma response. I’ve created the animal sanctuary, the campground. I’ve had 6000+ visitors since opening in July of 2019. A bulk of that was during Covid as this was the only place people could dispurse camp while visiting Sequoia Kings Canyon National Parks. It’s how the who ag-tourism campground came about.

I’ve tried to create community here. I once dreamed of an intentional community thriving (ikigai Sanctuary on ic.org) but I’ve learned how challenging bringing people together is. I’m at a burnout point. I’ve done pretty much everything nonstop solo. I only seem to attract freeloaders short term, not contributors. I created the 501c3 a year ago. Getting donors has been anything but successful. I just don’t have the energy or time to do it all. I still love this life over the prior comfortable I left. I guess I’m just at yet another transition moment. I know this to shall pass. It’s winter off season now so it’s back to just me and the lovingly demanding animals. Maybe this is the time to breathe and reflect and not be consumed with discouragement. I’ve become an odd duck. I crave human connection but I also love solitude. I’m still trying to find the perfect healthy balance. If you would like to visit my madness sometime, I’m about 6 hours from you. We get lots of San Diego/Encinitas visitors during peak season.