One good intention can easily result in a disaster, but with beautiful souls, a potential disaster can be avoided. In the past few days I met with most of my extended family, and I had the opportunity to be with my uncle from Hurungwe and my cousin whom I had given the money I had received from a friend, to buy some wire for fencing the garden in Hurungwe. It has been six months since we got the money and we were not sure if our cousin still had it. It was a relief to discover she still had the money, she had just failed to top it up in order to buy the fence as she had promised and because of the distances she had not found a way to return the money. We then decided we would buy the things that would enable the smooth working of the garden until my uncle becomes comfortable enough to survive off it. He had ideas of his own which we respected. He wanted to top his stock of seeds, so as to avoid running out, buy pesticides and also to find help with watering his garden. For the help, he intended to use beer as an incentive for the men he would engage, as he said beer was the cheapest and easiest way for him (when he had run the idea by me the previous night, I was not too surprised, as I based my knowledge on a common practice called "nhimbe" that I would read about or hear from others on how beer was/ is used in the rural area, when people help each other in the fields, I had asked him to also talk to my cousin about his intentions). But because my cousin (the one I had given money) experienced both a rural life and a town life, she knew a better and more durable way to solve the same problem,which was for him to work on his cart, a thing which turned out to be affordable, with the given budget. This led to a heated argument which did not end well between the two, as my uncle was fixed at doing things his own way, and would not be moved despite how all the other family members who were still present explained the advantage of fixing his cart and the temptation of misusing the powder for beer brewing for pleasure, instead of obtaining watering assistance. The catch 22 situation was that, the cousin my uncle exchanged strong words with was the one to help him with the buying of his things as she is the one based in Harare city. There was a very high possibility that my cousin would refuse to help, since she had absolutely nothing to loose in all this. When she had cooled down she is the one who looked for my uncle and took her time to explain why she thought her solution was a more lasting one, and after my uncle consulted with other people he discovered that indeed the other solution was the best. He was helped to shop around and now he is back in the rural area ready to fix his cart.
All the drama happened when I had already left for Gweru. Before this, I was seeing how extended family in the modern days, is slowly leaning towards a disadvantage rather than an advantage. The common thing nowadays is, in a family the successful person ends up taking care of the bulk of the family for most of his or her life, as they will be the fortunate ones. Instead of those who are helped to act in a way that eventually lessen the burden on the helper, they relax because they know that even if they do not work hard enough, someone else will clean up after them. Also when family would meet, it was rare to discuss issues that mattered. For a change, a family ganged up to help in the selection of an optimum solution to a member's challenge. And because of the deeper relationship that existed, there was patience, tolerance and understanding. It also took someone who really knew in depth alternatives, to solving my uncle's watering problem in his environment to find the best solution. Discovering that just giving someone money might not be a guarantee that things will work out, it is a relief in this case, to know that there is a support structure that will help us in our quest to make things work in the garden.
I have included a link to an article I found with more information on "nhimbe".
webpage