posted 7 years ago
My grandpa (the one who was scrupulously honest, not the other one) swore this happened to one of their neighbors.
A little boy had to go to the bathroom and didn't want to go all the way out back, so he just took a dump in the yard. Pretty quickly afterwards, he saw the local minister coming up to the house. Not wanting to get caught, he took his hat off and dropped it over the pile, just as the minister got to the gate.
"What have you got under your hat, Son?" The minister asked, noting the hat and the boys body language.
Thinking quickly the boy says. "I caught a bird. He's trapped under there, but if I lift the hat, he'll get away."
"No problem," Says the old man, positioning himself to lunge forward and catch the bird. "You jerk the hat off and I'll grab him!"
Of course, this was too good to pass up. The boy jerks the hat off, the man lunges forward, and I'll let you fill in the gap with your imagination.