Dez BRK (post deep roots)

Post 817
Day 64 [timing]
2023.08.07 Monday, morning entry

Grateful for refreshing perspective

This weekend there was rain
And smoke
And sunshine
And lots of internal frustrations
  I don’t remember how to handle
Frustrations because I spent so much time
Avoiding the causes
In community things happen
Beyond reasonable control
  More human factors
More Gilligan factors
Come into play
And communication seems futile
  What next?
My previous technique doesn’t really Work here
Avoidance seems to brew resentment
“Familiarity breeds contempt” comes to mind
  So we have community business where
We can bring things up
To potentially make frustrations smaller
And there are things that are frustrating but
Are doomed to reoccur
  The important thing to realize is that
These frustrations are mine..
That’s the first step
If they were everyone’s frustrations
Likely they wouldn’t exist
At least this is how I try to rationalize
  So if these frustrations or concerns
are indeed specific to me
(Which it kinda seems to be)
Then what do I do with them?
What’s my path to peace
among and within the understanding that
They reoccur?
  Maybe I start going for walks
Not sure yet
I’m positive that
The way will present itself
And it will be simple and delightful

Post 818
Day 65 [timing]
2023.08.08 Tuesday, morning entry

Grateful for shift

[Adaptability

  Recognize the things I had adopted and carried which weren’t actually mine
I tried it on but it didn’t serve me
Rather it ate at me
  Reconnect with the things that do serve me on my journey
Learn to let go of those heavy things
Control? Power? Illusions
Surrender to flow of service
Become and attract light
Shine
Share
Enjoy
Is this Not as the gardens do?
]

Post 819
Day 66 [timing]
2023.08.09 Wednesday, morning entry

Grateful for knowing when to slowing down

Doesn’t mean I’m good at it
The knowing of WHEN
I remember a time when I was
Well practiced at teaching with patience
  This now grumpy old man
Understands why grumpy old men exist
In fourth grade many students would murmur
About how our home room teacher was
Grumpy mean strict
  Judgements thrown around behind his back
Hearing these things I was curious WHY
why Mr. K seems pretty kind to me, I would Quietly think
And I only saw his brilliant side while
Many of my classmates feared his directness

Post 820
Day 67 [timing]
2023.08.10 Thursday, morning entry

Grateful for sharing

Post 821
Day 68 [timing]
2023.08.11 Friday, evening entry

Grateful for laughter
The Nelson’s bring the cool
Thanks Nelson’s

[Yesterday while working on the pump house I drank water too fast and ended up on my knees after gasping/coughing for a minute to clear the lungs.. a salute to the sun and a back bend later, the evening continued.. it felt like the universe bowed me down lol]