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I Got Married on Friday

 
pollinator
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I Got Married on Friday

 It was a civil ceremony in Cordova which is part of Cebu Philippines.

We first met 10 months ago and within a short time decided to get married. I was here from November 20th 2018 until February 20th 2019 and I returned here on June 5th. We hope to live in the Philippines most of the time. We will be buying a farm and that will become my primary business. But for now, I must continue to work in Canada and will return on September 5th.
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pollinator
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Congrats. Beautiful pics!

I was best man at a wedding in the Philippines 15 years ago. We were up in baguio city, beautiful area with some mild temps. My friend still lives there, still happily married.

All the best to you and yours.
 
pollinator
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Yeeee-Hah! Congrats, you guys!  Show how it's done! <GG>

Cigars all around! (Paul, you hear that? Site needs a CeeGar icon! <g>)

Best luck always. Hope you find time to keep posting.


Cheers,
Rufus
 
pollinator
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Wow, you wore a tie!!! That's one fancy wedding.

Of course, I wish you two the best future possible. By the way, she's lovely.
 
master pollinator
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What a beautiful family!  Congratulations!

 
Dale Hodgins
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This wedding cost me 30 thousand. We bought new outfits for 7 people, food for 35 people, rented a car and pay the few bribes to move things along with the paperwork.
........
We did a photoshoot with the dress, the shoes and headband.

Nova's mom made some noise about it being bad luck for me to see the dress. But we picked everything out together and Nova was very keen on seeing how the whole thing would look, since we bought everything separately.

She used curlers in her hair. I thought a whole look came together nicely. We've agreed that she looks like one of the polynesian women in the Disney movie, Moana.

It started out as a very tame affair, like a Cindy Crawford photoshoot. But soon she was strutting like a ladyboy, doing twirls and adding sound effects. Sonny, her brother,  covered his eyes. 🙂
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Dale Hodgins
pollinator
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It cost 30,000 philippine pesos☺ , which is about $580 US. I will make a thread in frugality, on how to get married in style for less than a thousand dollars.

Did I fool anybody? Did anybody really think that I spent 30 thousand dollars on a one day event ?

We had everything you need for a wedding and nothing that we didn't need .
 
Dale Hodgins
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Thank you everyone. It was a really fun day without the usual stress. Nova went through about 15 minutes of really stressing over things that might have been forgotten. She is a list maker, so I got her to check our list, and everything was in order.
 
Dale Hodgins
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Su Ba wrote:Wow, you wore a tie!!! That's one fancy wedding.

Of course, I wish you two the best future possible. By the way, she's lovely.



I don't know how to tie those things. This one comes premade with the knot and then there's a hidden zipper. I borrowed it from my neighbor , so I had something borrowed and something blue . I don't think they do that here.
 
Dale Hodgins
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This is a copy of a message to my daughter, from before the wedding.

It illustrates just how tight Nova is with money. She has no interest in owning expensive dresses or jewelry. House and land and all of the bills paid are the important priorities , according to her.
.................
Everything is converted to Canadian money.
.................
We went shopping for a wedding dress today. It was a toss up between two different ones. One was 400 pesos which is $10 and the other was 1,200 pesos which is $30. I insisted that we get both and that she can wear one of them just as a beach dress. They aren't really meant to be wedding dresses, just nice white dresses that are pretty light . It's hot here. People would roast in the sort of things that are worn in North America. Nova thought that 1200 was far too much to pay for any dress. But I took them both up to the front and in the end, the expensive one came up at 400 pesos which is $10. Some sort of sale.

We took the three girls from our old place to get them dresses for the event. Two of the kids are eight and one is nine. We got some really nice stuff along with hair ties. About $40 all together .

Tomorrow we will take Isabel, Sonny and their mom to get new outfits . Probably another $40.

So we've managed to outfit the bride, 3 members of her family and 3 flower girls, for a total of $100. The little girls were very happy. They had no idea that we were coming over or that they would be going shopping. I spent $1 and got them all a big ice cream.

Earlier in the day we got two wedding rings that are actually decent quality costume jewelry. 1,400 pesos which is $35. We talked about getting something different but Nova has no interest in owning expensive jewelry. She said  it would make her a target for theft. Better to put money into the house and land, she said.

We are going to feed somewhere between 20 and 40 people. About $5 each and that includes the meal, dessert and drinks, at a buffet restaurant so we don't have to worry about renting tables and chairs or doing dishes.

Nova added it all up and told me we need to be careful, to not spend too much more. She was right because there are many expenses involved in immigration. My kind of girl.

I'll send pictures of her $10 dollar dresses tomorrow.

It's funny that clothing is so cheap, but toothpaste, hand cream and shampoo cost twice what they do in Canada. There are many other things that are crazy expensive, so we will look at supplying those when we look at different businesses. I would never try to run the restaurant where I feed people all they can eat for so little.
 
steward
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Delightful!
 
garden master
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Congratulations Dale! I wish both of you the very best!
 
pollinator
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Congratulations, Dale. I wish you both happiness and success in your future endeavours.

-CK
 
pollinator
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Congratulations Dale and Nova!! A beautiful start, I wish you all the happiness in the world!

(i'm another one in the happily-married-in-city-hall contingent. We spent the wedding money on other things, had our celebration in the bar where we met, and never regretted a thing. That Nova is a smart cookie.)
 
Dale Hodgins
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Wedding culture here is heavily influenced by the United States and other foreign places. People go in for expensive gowns , they rent venues and hire wedding planners, buy expensive cakes and find other ways to make it quite costly.

There is a lot of keeping up with the Joneses with the comparisons to other weddings they've been to. I had a few people trying to sell me various wedding services. They have never encountered such a brick wall. It's usually about deciding how much the couple can afford and then try to talk them into a little more than that. One pushy woman used a "keeping up with the Joneses" argument to try to convince me on an expensive venue. She asked me what people will think. I told her that I don't care one little bit what they think and that I've seen how this place is run, and am not impressed by what some think is a priority.

The pushy woman kept using the term "what you can afford." She knows where I live, so I told her that I could afford to buy that place twice every year , but I have chosen not to buy it, because of the low quality of construction.

Finally,  I explained that it's a cultural thing. I don't put any value on the various inducements to purchase that she presented. I told her that our discussion was like someone trying to sell a ladder to a fish. I compared it to the skin bleaching products that are so prevalent. If I were a Filipino woman, there might be appeals to price, quality and what other people are using. But for me the whole thing is absolutely nuts , so again a cultural thing.

We have had fun with it. It's not just professionals that thought the wedding should cost a little more. Family and acquaintances like to see money spent on weddings that they are invited to to. Just yesterday , we met a fellow we know and showed him our wedding rings that are worth a total of 27 US dollars. Highly embarrassing for some people, but a badge of honor for me.

I get off easy, because I don't need to prove to Nova's family or friends that I can afford to support a family. It's assumed that most visitors are fabulously wealthy and compared to Nova's family, I am. Several times during the planning, it became a teaching moment for her siblings. They have bought telephones that they can't afford and one sister threw herself a birthday party that consumed most of her available cash. That sister was very worried that the wedding would not go well if we didn't do the things that she has seen other wealthy people do. I expect that she will spend much more on her wedding. She earns about $4 a day as a nanny and her boyfriend earns about $8 working at Home Depot. I am helping with education , but there is no way that I will contribute one penny to a lavish wedding.
 
pollinator
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Congrats Dale!

Seems like the right type of wedding to me, if one is necessary; obviously not optional given the citizenship issues in play here, leaving aside cultural/social reasons!



The most angst-ridden, overplanned wedding I have attended occupied the entirety of the brides' mind for a year... so many ways to spend money! She ran off with a preposterously sleazy guy a couple months later. Somehow the magical event had failed to transform her life..
 
Dale Hodgins
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Thank you everyone.

Yes marriage was very necessary for us because it's the starting point for immigration to Canada. I would like to spend 9 months of the year in the Philippines , running a farm that we have not yet purchased, but even if we spent all of our time here , marriage would be very important for Nova, socially. It legitimizes our relationship in the eyes of her family and the rest of society. Many family members speculated that I would have my fun with her and move on. Her family were at the absolute bottom of the totem pole in a poor village. They made the children fight one another for food after their father died. Some are very troubled at her newfound status. They don't want to see anyone rise above wherever they consider themselves to be in society. The bulk of them are penniless drunks.
..........
I was very surprised when filling out paperwork, that after stating who my parents were and where I was born, it was necessary to state whether my birth was legitimate or illegitimate. Seems a little backward, but people get crucified in the Philippines every Easter. It's not the most modern place, culturally. Unmarried women with children are disadvantaged and the disadvantages go well into adulthood for those children. Much better to be a widow or an orphan. One of the top television shows is called of The Bastards. A large group of illegitimate offsprings of a wealthy man who battle one another and legitimate children for family resources.

I like what Bianca Jagger had to say about this about 35 years ago, concerning some of Sir Mick's offspring. She said that all children are legitimate , but some married people enter into illegitimate relationships.
 
Dale Hodgins
pollinator
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We bought a really slick ride a few weeks ago. This 125 Yamaha has far more power than I'm able to utilize on our congested roads.

I bought it used with only 8,000 kilometres or 5,000 miles on it, for the equivalent of $769 US. The former owner is a neighbor who constantly tinkers with his bikes, using better than stock parts. It has far more kick than other 125s I've  driven.

We had to make a lot of trips the week of the wedding. We went through almost $4 worth of gas. This week it might cost $2.50

Nothing is very far. Most trips are under 10 minutes and under 20 mph. I went to the market early in the morning the other day and really opened it up on an open stretch. I got up to 70 kph or about 45 mph for five seconds.
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Congratulations Kola, may you have many years of happiness together.

Redhawk
 
pollinator
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Congratulations Dale!

I like the "right-sized" driveways for the bikes!
 
pollinator
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Congratulations!!                  
I got married in Dumaguete City for around $500.  It was a wedding in name only and referred to as a Pame-li (spelling is wrong).  This was so we could be together but good in the eyes of the church.  It is a ceremony where the intent is to have a real marriage somewhere else and is done by a priest and of course comes with the goats and chickens making sounds in the background.
 
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Dale Hodgins wrote:It cost 30,000 philippine pesos☺ , which is about $580 US. I will make a thread in frugality, on how to get married in style for less than a thousand dollars.

Did I fool anybody? Did anybody really think that I spent 30 thousand dollars on a one day event ?

We had everything you need for a wedding and nothing that we didn't need .



Congratulatiions! Awesome joke and awesome frugality lesson! I was briefly fooled by this.   Very best wishes for a happy life!
 
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