Eino Kenttä wrote:Another thought, from a different angle: My partner did hypnosis, and it helped her (mostly) get rid of her fear of spiders. Maybe that could work?
My Daughter in law (DiL) dated my son for many years, and at the beginning, her fear of spiders was practically paralyzing (although not as bad as the time somehow a squirrel got into her apartment and she *TOTALLY FREAKED OUT*.
So first off - no, it is not a "stupid fear". Somehow, in your brain, that fear was triggered and allowed to sit there, and depending on exactly how severe it is, it may deserve the label "phobia" which might actually require a professional to help you with. But definitely not fair or nice for you to label yourself, as the person coping with the fear, "stupid". Only you can decide how deeply set the fear is, vs where the "I am truly disgusted and revolted by worms." bit takes over.
How to help you overcome your feeling through a computer interface is tricky. My son spent a lot of time reassuring my DiL, bought her a long handled insect catcher so she could gradually get to the point of being able to catch the spiders and move them outdoors, and gradual exposure to the real world on our homestead (chickens, ducks, lots of bugs), have brought her a long way, but it was gradual and took time.
I would suggest that reminding yourself daily intellectually about how important a job the worms do may help. I suspect you're not at the point where you would see the suggestion of building your own 'worm farm' to get to know your worms as pets (very ugly pets exist), would be doable. (But can you even imagine people having worms as pets? Can you accept in your brain, that other people talk to their worms while they re-locate them out of danger in their garden? That we genuinely see them as our garden helpers? Or do thoughts like that frighten, disgust, or defeat you at this time?)
Maggie, you are not alone, and you are not crazy. I believe your description of your feelings. My DiL has come along so well, but she's had lots of support and encouragement getting there, so I believe you can get there too, and this thread is a great place to start and getting yourself more comfortable around worms seems like a wonderful winter project that will help you prepare yourself for next year's gardening season.
Help us help you set some goals you feel you can achieve, just as you would for any other skill. I believe you can find a way, with support, and I, and others on permies, are here to support you with cheers and ideas!
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