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how to use a bidet ?

 
ray Bunbury
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I want a bidet like this



but it makes your butt wet.

How do you use it?  Do you have a special bum towel?  Or dry with toilet paper?

The water looks cold.  Is it a problem?

 
r ranson
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I want to know more about this too.

This is going to be a gross question, sorry.  Does it take care of sticky post-vindaloo mess or does one need to wipe first, then wash, then dry?

I feel a bit like the first time one encounters the three seashells.  This is all very new to me.

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Joylynn Hardesty
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raven ranson wrote:
I feel a bit like the first time one encounters the three seashells.



I sometimes wonder about those seashells when I must use a public restroom.

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Madison Woods
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I've not used the bidets at any of the restrooms I've been to because I too am unsure how the drying off part of the deal works, lol. However, I can tell you they're much in use in the Middle Eastern places I've visited. All of the bathrooms get pretty wet on the floors and the floors almost always have drains in them for this reason, even in the private residence apartments. They seem to be extremely handy for staying fresh in very hot environments but the whole 'what to do about the wet bum' issue confounds me, lol. Commenting here just so I can keep up with replies. Hope we have a seasoned user hop in to clear up the mystery!

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Chris Kott
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My first was a surprise. I was in an AirBnB, and I didn't know it was installed in the toilet. I reached for the toilet paper, and it squirted me in the bum! I nearly jumped through the ceiling!

Ever since, I have wanted one at home. I always wiped with toilet paper post-bidet spray, just because of the wet bum issue. I wouldn't be sanguine with a communal wet bum towel, and air drying would take too long. Plus, having been raised to toilet paper, I would be worried about how good a job that jet of water was doing.

Though I think that even if it only cuts paper usage by half, it's still a great idea.

-CK

A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects.
-Robert A. Heinlein

 
Tereza Okava
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in homes with a bidet there is often a bidet towel (usually it's dark, if you're in Europe and there is a small dark-colored towel, that's the butt towel, don't use it for your face or your host will get upset).
If you're in a place with no bidet towel, you could dry off with less TP than you would normally use, as CK mentions (i also have the same concerns about "just in case"). I installed one in my house a few years ago (mine not a bidet, but rather a "butt gun" that is a hose installed beside the toilet; in the US I've heard about this model of "insta-bidet" that seems pretty cool https://hellotushy.com/pages/how-does-a-bidet-work ). Obviously the amount of worry about a clean caboose is connected to what your diet and consequent output is like, but it is a rather shallow learning curve, easy to figure out.
the way it worked out here is that I bought washcloths to use after urinating (it's really just me, home office, were there multiple people I suppose there would have to be more of a system), and then use minimal paper after #2. It's super and when I travel I really miss it.  

@Chris Kott, I got attacked by a stealth bidet in Japan. Not cool is an understatement!!!
 
Carla Burke
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Thanks for posting this! I've been curious for a long time. Like ever since Crocodile Dundee washed his feet! I've no idea why it never occurred to me, just how much better for the environment it would be, because I always just guessed you'd still have to use the tp to dry of with.

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Michelle Reasor
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I've always been kind of scared of bidets. Thanks for the info! They're a bit less...weird...to me now.

Just a mom, trying to do best by her kids.

 
Rebecca Norman
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In India many people still prefer to wash with water rather than wipe with paper. I'm not so happy with the wet crotch phenomenon, though. Usually it's a sprayer attached next to the toilet, exactly like the sprayers on kitchen sinks in the US, and they get water everywhere, so that trying to dry off with toilet paper is messy, uses a lot of toilet paper, and still leaves dampness in your clothing.

But in some houses I've seen these toilet seats with a built in very narrow focused "jet spray" that I like better. It sprays such a narrow jet of water right across the middle of the seat that you don't get water on the non-target areas. After this, drying with paper is possible.

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F Agricola
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We used the ones in Japan a few times.

They had a toilet/bidet combo to typically save on space, with a consol on the side: buttons for men and women - the angle of the dangle issues - and a dial to change the temperature of the water. It also blew warm air to dry off on different settings.

The routine was to: do the deed, wipe with paper, then use the console to wash and dry.

I'm surprised there wasn't a pre-recorded message advising a job well done and a pleasant 'konnichiwa'!

The complexity of the console would rival the helm on the Star Trek Ship Enterprise.

It took a bit of fiddling because all the instructions were typically in Japanese.

The three traps for beginners were the warm air and water pressure adjustments, and the male/female buttons.

If selected too high the warm air could dehydrate a date and the water pressure provide a reasonable alternative to a colonoscopy.

And, if you're a male, advise not using the female button unless you wish to experience a very different sensation that definitely wasn't sensational!

'Every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain.'

 
Mike Homest
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It seems to be one of those you stick in a toilette? A piece of crap, a real bidet has hot and cold water supply so you can adjust the water temperature to your ass/etc needs. A toilet has just cold water as it doesn't need hot water. So depending on where you are and the date, washing with cold water is a really stupid idea...;-(
 
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A solution to the drying issue?

 
Tereza Okava
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Mike Homest wrote:So depending on where you are and the date, washing with cold water is a really stupid idea...;-(


This was exactly what my spouse said when I installed it (he is very anti-bidet). Here it gets cold, not like polar vortex cold, but 55F in the office and the bathroom is colder if the window is open, and we don't have hot water in the bathroom (except the shower, which uses an electric unit on the shower itself). And yet, I've had this thing for a good 3 years, and am surprised to report that the cold water hasn't been an issue at all. Then again i'm a barbarian and also wash my face with cold water, so who knows.
 
r ranson
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Someone sent me a news story about bidets and how they are supposed to help with certain health issues.

I still haven't gotten around to getting one yet.  But it's getting higher up the list.  

I think this would save water as it would cut back on bathing needs.  

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Dale Hodgins
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A jug of warm water turns any toilet into a bidet. You just have to remember to bring it in. I've never been a TP only guy.

And there's nothing wrong with using the bathroom sink. Just rinse it out afterwards. For anyone tall enough to get your arse over the sink, it's possible to wash that and other offending parts. If I've been to your house, this has happened. Get over it. Then you wash your hands and make sure to give the sides of a sink a little dribble.
 
Stephanie Meyer
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Dale Hodgins wrote:A jug of warm water turns any toilet into a bidet. You just have to remember to bring it in. I've never been a TP only guy.

And there's nothing wrong with using the bathroom sink. Just rinse it out afterwards. For anyone tall enough to get your arse over the sink, it's possible to wash that and other offending parts. If I've been to your house, this has happened. Get over it. Then you wash your hands and make sure to give the sides of a sink a little dribble.



As a short fat girl I feel like this scenario would likely be the beginning of the story given to the ER doc about “ how this injury occurred” . And likely as well received as the stories from people about “ how the teacup got stuck there”.

You do not have to be good.You do not have to walk on your knees For a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.You only have to let the soft animal of your body
love what it loves. -Mary Oliver

 
Gurkan Yeniceri
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Living abroad and coming from a nation who is using bidet for all of its life, it is one of the first modifications we do in a toilet. Sometimes in the form of a jug, water bottle (if renting) or a T junction, pipe and a tap if bought the place.

Because we do it since we start using the toilet as a kid, it is now unnatural for us not to wash our bum :-)

My grandma used to have cotton clothes to dry it off but industrialization and easy-to-use aspect made us to use toilet paper nowadays.

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Daniel Ackerman
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Yup, after living in Turkey for a year, coming back to the bidet-less USA was appalling. We immediately modified our toilet.

That being said, we have four year olds now, and the water pressure in our bathroom demands an extremely light touch on the bidet dial. Haven’t quite figured out how to teach the kids about it. Opened all the way up, it would probably shoot them across the room!

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Sonja Draven
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On a recent road trip driving through Nebraska, I saw a billboard that said, "Mom approved restrooms."  It was perfect timing so I stopped.  Inside the bathroom were fancy individual stalls and these greeted me.  I have always wanted to try a bidet to see if I would like them but even though they looked really clean, I was too creeped out by stranger germs mixed with water spraying my privates to try it.  So I stuck with the tp.  Maybe someday...
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Caleb Mayfield
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When I was 6 my family moved to Chile for 3 years. The bathrooms in the house each had a separate bidet adjacent to the toilet. Being 6, and coming from the US I had no idea what it was actually for. What I can tell you is what my younger sister and I told our parents within 20 minutes of being in the house.

"There is a fountain in the bathroom and it will spray the ceiling!"

Mother was not amused.

I never did find out what it was for until many years later after we moved back to the US. Pity.

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I've been considering a bidet seat upgrade to my toilet for a while. Found a recommended one on the Evil Empire of Amazon that I like. link for reference
I started out with the cheaper version on my wishlist, and then read the comparison information and reviews from the deluxe version that required a slight amount of work to hook up to the hot water line. With temperature control, there's no freeze ray in winter. Worth the extra ten bucks imo.  
Only reason I haven't bought it yet is because I'm in a rental that I'm not sure if we're staying in for another year or if they're going to raise our rent enough to make me want to leave. Not wanting to install twice in a short period of time.

Most of the reviews that refer to drying off just use a small amount of tp. I'm considering a personal washcloth, but eh. We'll see.
 
Dale Hodgins
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For washing your backside, right?

Crocodile Dundee. 1986 movie.
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r ranson
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It works.

Bracing but refreshing.  

"be kind, be calm, be safe"
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Carla Burke
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Stephanie Meyer wrote:

Dale Hodgins wrote:A jug of warm water turns any toilet into a bidet. You just have to remember to bring it in. I've never been a TP only guy.

And there's nothing wrong with using the bathroom sink. Just rinse it out afterwards. For anyone tall enough to get your arse over the sink, it's possible to wash that and other offending parts. If I've been to your house, this has happened. Get over it. Then you wash your hands and make sure to give the sides of a sink a little dribble.



As a short fat girl I feel like this scenario would likely be the beginning of the story given to the ER doc about “ how this injury occurred” . And likely as well received as the stories from people about “ how the teacup got stuck there”.



You win! Best post of the day!!! BWAHAHAHA!!!

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Skandi Rogers
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I think that 6C water on sensitive regions would be pretty horrific personally!
 
Carla Burke
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Dale Hodgins wrote: For anyone tall enough to get your arse over the sink, it's possible to wash that and other offending parts. If I've been to your house, this has happened. Get over it. Then you wash your hands and make sure to give the sides of a sink a little dribble.



~makes mental note - meet Dale only in public places~

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r ranson
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Skandi Rogers wrote:I think that 6C water on sensitive regions would be pretty horrific personally!



It's a bit colder here as the well is deep.  But not as bad as one would expect.  I don't think I would enjoy a warm water bidet.  

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Dale Hodgins
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Carla Burke wrote:

Dale Hodgins wrote:

~makes mental note - meet Dale only in public places~



I do some of my best work in public. Many job sites do not have a port a potty. They almost all have tall rhododendrons or other places where a shallow hole can be dug. Toilet paper leaves evidence. The best thing to do is leave only human waste and then wash with water. The critters will take care of it in a matter of days, during warm weather. After i leave it's usually months before anyone is concerned with the garden again. The new house has to be built first.
-----
Here in the Philippines we don't even stock toilet paper. Every bathroom that i've been in is a wet bathroom , meaning that it's ok to get water everywhere since everything is covered in tile. That sprayer is used for showers , washing the bathroom and washing backsides. I prefer the plastic dipper.

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