A Sincere Thank You, Confession and Apology (Long)

I put this in Introductions because I could not in good conscious put it in "Meaningless Drivel", my sincere thank you is anything but that. It could go in Toxic Gick, but I was not sure if that is a forum everyone is open to see. EVERYONE needs to know the depth of generosity the members of Permies has, so I felt here was best. Finally a warning, this post is long, but it has to be. I need to be clear in my sincere thank you, my deepest confession, and in my apology.

Without question, the generosity extended from those on Permies Forum’s is truly amazing. It takes many forms; from honest answers to people’s homesteading questions, to learning experiences, and amazingly in the form of financial help to a poor farmer in Maine as well. This post will be long, but is a thank you for sure, and a big confession and dose of humility for me, which is truly required.

I got Nicole’s letter, and Judith’s card on Christmas Eve Day, and was utterly stunned by the amount collected. They say that of the members of an online forum, only 1% actively participate, and so to think so many people would give of their hard-earned money to an unknown person on the internet is remarkable, and I am thoroughly touched.

It probably goes without saying, but I was never looking for sympathies or a handout. I just had a particularly tough two years, having contentious meetings with three doctors whom I always beloved. I have known these doctors for years, yet we had just reached an impasse. Animosity even extended with a contentious meeting at church where friends and family were deeply divided over a kids program that some people wanted to end because they did not want their kids co-mingling with secular children. This made me angry as how can Christian’s expect non-Christians to act like them? My goodness, we have 150 kids wanting to come to church, we should be opening our arms to them.

So, it was not just Permies that I strayed from. I deleted my facebook Account as well as a few other chatrooms I would often frequent. I stopped going places, and really made my world very small. In some ways that is a very dangerous place to go, but for someone in my condition, almost required. It is hard to put into words because stating, “I just cannot handle stress”, does not do it justice. The pituitary gland controls everything; from energy levels to feelings of self-worth. I was NEVER mad at anyone, I just wanted to retreat.

And while Nicole and Judith made it perfectly clear that the money presented could be for anything, I feel it is only fair to tell everyone exactly where their money went. I want you to know, to realize that I had just returned from the bank where I had taken my last $42 out, and proceeded to buy $23 in medication for my seizures. That left me with only $19 to my name, and a week until Katie got paid again...then I came home to a mailbox with a letter and card in it. What you do not know is, that was the exact amount we missed for a bank payment a week before. We just could not pay it even though we really had too, and I had no idea what I was going to tell the bank! Yet thanks to your generosity, it is paid…in full…and yes it is 100% a farm related payment. I know paying a bill is not heroic to many, but for me it sure is because it had to be paid. So from the bottom of my heart (and Katie’s and our four daughters too), THANK YOU!

As for my health, this is where I must swallow my pride and make some confessions about my lack of intellect and dismal pride because some significant developments have developed. The biggest is, through a separate Doctor, and a separate hospital (a Veteran’s hospital), my father was diagnosed with the same thing I have. The significance of this is huge, only 400 people a year in this country, out of 300 million, are diagnosed with this condition, yet me and my father both, who live in a tiny town in Maine, have it. That of course means it is hereditary, but in an odd way.

My father served two tours in Vietnam and was deployed along the Vietnam/Cambodia border on a riverboat. Six times he was subjected to direct sprays from Agent Orange. The problem is, what made it effective, which is its ability to stick to the molecular structure of the plant it was sprayed on, and kill the vegetation, also causes it to stick to the genes of humans. The result is simple, this will be passed along from generation to generation in our family...up to5 generations! I had always blamed my low-dose radiation from being around x-ray for my welding as to the culprit for my rare cancers, now it seems it came from Agent Orange.

Despite the very contentious meetings with my health care team, I got a referral to a research hospital out of state, and a letter sent to the pituitary specialist there; reviewed my background and concluded that I indeed have issues that merit more intimate study. Here in Maine they lack the MRI that is sophisticated enough to see my Pituitary with any clarity. They just see a dark spot, know something is wrong, but are not sure what. Equally there is nothing they can do even if they could see it. So that is why they said, “There is nothing we can do”. I however, am not taking that for an answer. I still have options, and was assertive enough to be able to go to a research hospital for help.

The dose of humility and confession stems from a rather casual attitude to pesticides and herbicides. I never used Herbicides and Pesticides while I was a member of Permies as that was against the rules and I abided by them, but that does not mean we did not use them in the past. In fact, when I was a kid we used to spray for potato bugs, as well as defoliate to kill the tops before harvest. We also used to dip our bags of corn seed in Strychnine so that when the crows ate the seed, they would die. And up until a few years ago planted Monsanto Round-Up Ready Corn and Sprayed Round-Up. As a Christian, I hesitate to say this, but to make a strong point; for those that now say, “Travis, you stupid fuck”, with tears in my eyes for being so stupid, I have to concur.

I often defended Round Up Ready Corn, and one year, in a town that banned Round-Up Ready Corn, we cited the Right to Farm Act of Maine, tossed bags of Round-Up-Ready corn seed in the planter, and planted the fields. We were not breaking the law under protection of the Right to Farm Act, but did break the wishes of the majority in town. And while Round-Up is NOT Agent Orange I know, it does have similar properties. It is almost ironic that the herbicides that I often defended, is a off-spin of what is now killing me. “Stupid Fuck”, is appropriate…organic and permaculture farming was right all along.

As for our financial outlook, it is getting better. When the logger whole stole our wood (about 1600 cords, or 75 tractor trailer loads of forest products), he left a skidder behind. I called the Sherriff’s office, the State Police, two banks, the equipment dealerships, the County Commissioner’s Office, the District Attorney’s Office. and a few other places to try to find the bank that owned the machine, all to no avail. Finally, the called me looking to repossess it from the logger. I said come get it…as soon as they paid me the $32 a day storage fee that was owed!!! (I am not letting it go, not without getting money from my stolen wood). Since it has been 274 days and counting, the storage fee is well over $8,800. She said it was more than the tractor was worth so they are just going to abandon it. So now that I own it, I hope to sell it and pay my property taxes.

We should also get some money from income taxes from my wife’s job, so we can get caught up on a few bills, but we also decided to sell our other home. It will be sad to see it go as I built it from the ground up, but it will put us in a much better financial spot as I continue with my battle with more cancer. Shameless plug: if anyone wants to move to Maine, 5 miles from Maine Farmer and Gardener Association’s main fairgrounds, and has the best soil in the state, huge house, 3.5 acres but willing to lease a few hundred more, with a 100 sheep barn with insulated lambing shed…let me know! :-)

But in conclusion, thank you everyone for the money collected, and to my dear friends Nicole and Judith who were kind enough to send it.  It was a wonderful gesture, and came at just the right time, for a specific need, and just before Christmas.

Oh…and Merry Christmas! :-)

Travis, I would suspect that just about all of us have things in our past we wish we hadn't done.  Things that we are paying for now and in our future.  That is one of the blessings of a forum like this.  We learn from each other and we better our future-hopefully for our ourselves, our families, friends and planet. Don't beat yourself up too much.

I am glad that your permie friends could help with one of your many stresses.  And I really hope the research doctors can provide help.

Much peace and hope to you and yours,
Tina

Thanks Travis. I believe that a father/son in my family share a similar Agent Orange poisoning experience. Ugh! Might be part of the reason why I take a strong anti-poison and anti-chemical stance.

Travis, there are a lot of people in the Permies community who like you, value what you have to contribute, and hope you continue to do so.

You never hid the fact that you seem to know your way around conventional farming practices so I don't think your "confession" will shock anyone :p  Your dark evil past is forgiven :)

I know from experience you need to push to get what's needed in the medical system, especially when you're not a textbook case. Do what you need to to keep your energy up. Hope this new avenue leads somewhere.

Things have a way of working out Travis.  Thank you so much for taking the time to write that long note to us, very much appreciated.  A very merry Christmas to you and your family!  So glad that we were able to lend a hand.

Hey, Travis - Great to hear from you!

Good to know things are moving a little positive, information coming out, maybe some pathways opening up. Stuff like that we all need time to time. Best luck this coming 2019.

Here's a link that probably doesn't really relate directly, but it shows there _are_ med people willing to scratch their heads and keep pushing. Which might make for nicer thoughts in that direction! <g> The "Postscript" paragraph half way down kinda summarizes.

https://www.npr.org/sections/goatsandsoda/2018/05/04/606345319/when-a-mystery-outbreak-strikes-who-you-gonna-call

Happy New Year to you and yours.


Rufus

Travis.
Thank you so much for sharing with us.

You've been in my thoughts this Christmas Day.  I'm grateful that you took the time to drop in and let us know how you're doing.

Merry Christmas,  Travis. Glad to hear from you. You know how we all feel, so I'm just going to wish you and yours a Merry Christmas,  and all the best in the new year.

-CK

It's good to hear from you again! It's okay if you must disappear now and again, you will always be welcome to add your knowledge to our conversations. Take care of you and yours first. God bless.

Merry Christmas, Travis!!

I'm so glad the check and letter arrived safely and even in time for Christmas! I'm glad I was able to play a small part in getting the funds to you. Being able to pay a bill is no small thing. I'm so happy that we were able to help remove that burden ♥.

I hope your old home sells quickly so you no longer need to worry about that--you could even post in the real estate section here on permies .

See, we were just learning from you about Responsibility: "do YOU have the ability to make something better, then...what is your response to that?" We had the ability, and we responded!

Travis, I'm really sorry to hear about your health problems.  My step-father spent about three years in Vietnam, in the Marines, and also has health problems from that time.  A lot of thoughtless, ill-conceived things were done during that war, and you are one of many still suffering as a result.

Do keep posting.  I've enjoyed reading your thoughts on a lot of things.

Nicole Alderman wrote:Merry Christmas, Travis!!

I'm so glad the check and letter arrived safely and even in time for Christmas! I'm glad I was able to play a small part in getting the funds to you. Being able to pay a bill is no small thing. I'm so happy that we were able to help remove that burden ♥.

I hope your old home sells quickly so you no longer need to worry about that--you could even post in the real estate section here on permies .

See, we were just learning from you about Responsibility: "do YOU have the ability to make something better, then...what is your response to that?" We had the ability, and we responded!

Nicole, words escape me, and when I say you are a true friend, I say that with utmost love and respect, yet feel it falls so short. I wish we lived closer...

As for your words, beyond just feeling like I am in a slump medically and with the brain fog that I have, on another forum a guy mentioned that "I was far too open." I really reflected on that, and could not help but feel that he was right. Part of it is my personality of course, I have passion and drive so I do like being honest and open, but some because where I live is very secure too. I just open up online.

But was it too much? More importantly; did all my typing really matter?

I did not think it did, but I was wrong. There have been a few private messages that conveyed that, along with your statement Nicole about Ability-Response and the word Responsibility being backwards. I am glad that stuck with you. But William Bronson's private message touched me the most. I cannot convey that here, but it brought tears to my eyes. I have devoted my life to an endeavor so that people do not make the same mistakes I have made. Not in homesteading mistakes, but in life applications that are so, so much more important.

I am not trying to be evasive on this, it is a private matter, but sometimes you do not realize you touch people's lives for the better because there is no face to face contact, just typed words.

Indeed: the pen is mightier than the sword!

Travis, I don't want to speak for everyone, but I don't think you should spend time or energy trying to figure out if you are too open or too shut off or if it is okay for you to take a break from everything or anything else.  You are you, and people respect you for it.  I added my tiny contribution to the whole because you are sincere and honest and, I believe, really concerned with doing right by your family and friends.  I'm glad I could do my very small part to help.

Travis, your typing does matter.

As informative and as helpful the different style posts are in these forums, I find its the personal ones that touch me the most and make me want to try harder.  Seeing how much permaculture affects people and truly has meaning makes me feel like what I am trying to do has purpose.  The stories you share are a big part of that and I thank you for them. It has been good to see your name on the forum again.

Dear Travis,

I agree with Tina. I think many/most/all? have incidents in our lives that we look back and go "holy crap, what was I thinking?" I'm just sorry that it's affecting you so much now. My past may catch up with me as well some day, but I'd like to think that all of the good stuff I've done makes up for it on my personal "decent person" scale.

Wishing you and your family well.

Merry Christmas Travis, Katie, and girls!

Thank you for posting, Travis. I'm glad we could help, and your family will be in my prayers.

I'm always glad to read your posts here.  You're a valued member of our community.
Thank you for sharing your time with us.

I'm praying for you, brother, and I hope that God gives you the emotional and physical strength to keep fighting for your life, your livelihood, and the joys that can be had on this earth.  Merry Christmas!

Travis I'm so glad you've posted - I'm kind of a new kid with the regulars but must agree with everyone else that your candor and  stories about your life put you on my list of favorites      I truly hope that you find solutions to your problems because your beautiful family deserves to have you healthy and happy.   I seem to miss a lot of posts and threads as I'm not on here everyday so when I learned you were signing off of permies I sent a Facebook message about resources for detoxing  and curing cancer naturally.  (hope you'll excuse the presumption     You may not have seen that but I referenced a few websites and Youtube channels  Ranging from Nourishing Traditions, Gerson Therapy,  Dr. John Bergman (Youtube) and there are many more.  

My personal experience in healing with food and supplements has eliminated  some nagging chronic conditions as I age!   Particularly on the subject of fatigue and weakness, Magnesium and D3 have made me feel young again!  See Dr. Carolyn Dean   youtube.com/watch?v=d55y4yOnn3c&t=73s

Virtually all the therapies for cancer have to do with alkalyzing the body, cleansing and strengthening the liver.    If you've not studied these topics before,  warning, don't be put off by the emphasis on vegetables, no meat, coffee enemas... that's usually in the context of therapy, not necessarily a lifelong requirement.    Hopefully you have time to look into some of these folks and I would like to offer any assistance I can with researching therapies specific to your needs.   I'm the google queen and have the time.

ALSO - if you decide to try something like Gerson Therapies that is very intense and best done with the assistance of experts, I'll be the first to contribute to a GoFundMe page for you to be able to afford the clinical assistance, labwork and the mountain of organic veggies required     You can assuage your guilt by living a long, strong life to be a healthy testimonial for all the other skeptics out there

Meanwhile - eat lots of kale, and the ABC's  (apple, beets, carrots)      

one more:    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cvHxoo9CZcs

Thank you Travis for your response of perfect length, and breadth.

After a tough two years retreating is exactly what you needed to do. Dr.'s who are taught they know all there is to know - (ha!).

I think you are spot on for holding your ground to allow ANYBODY who wants to be exposed to, in the best case scenario, examples of walking in Light and Love.

Allowing us glimpses into your life, where you shine, and your challenges, is an honor and a privilege. I learn by your example.

You gave us, as a community, a (another) reason to rally, for us to shine and be our best, and welcome you back. May you begin to know how much your words and life mean.

I am overjoyed you are back. Overjoyed you are in the hands of better equipment and more knowledgeable dr.s, that a big bill was paid, and your mind relieved and your strength renewed.

Blessings upon you and your family, the cozy one in Maine, and your international online family.

Nicole Alderman wrote:Merry Christmas, Travis!!

I'm so glad the check and letter arrived safely and even in time for Christmas! I'm glad I was able to play a small part in getting the funds to you. Being able to pay a bill is no small thing. I'm so happy that we were able to help remove that burden ♥.

I'm so glad I had the privilege to participate in a teeny tiny way, too.

I am overjoyed to see you back on these forums! I missed you!

Travis Johnson wrote: "I was far too open."
[...] But was it too much? More importantly; did all my typing really matter?

Yes, it really mattered to me. It may sound strange since I haven't even been here that long, but your posts were so helpful and full of wisdom and experience that they really spoke to me.

I think that it is possibly the combination of openness and humility that makes your posts so helpful.

I'm so happy that you are back and that Permies exists.

I shared a shortened version of all of this with my family. I told them how much you helped people here on Permies and how people wanted to help you when you in turn were in trouble. I was so happy that I could tell this story to my children as an example of goodness in the world and how people really do care and this caring can sometimes cross seemingly insurmountable obstacles like distance and differences of opinions and life situations and many other things.

Hello Travis,

I'm so glad to see you back on here. I will continue to pray for you, I've been so sorry to hear about all the trouble you've been having.

Travis, I'm glad that you seem to be getting to the root cause of your illness. My husband's step-father was a marine in Vietnam, and suffers from various effects of Agent Orange, his son, my husband's half-brother, also has various disorders that we believe to be from his father's exposure. Nasty stuff.  We have all been keeping you our thoughts

It is amazing that funds can sometimes arrive at the perfect time, and I hope you sell the skidder for much more than you need.  I was blessed with some much needed funds recently, when a former coworker from my Harvard days sent me a letter. He has a hobby of searching State treasury lost money accounts. He found an account that had both my father (who passed away in 2005) and my name on it. I was able to file a claim on line, scanning and sending his death certificate. It took a few months but sure enough, I got a check that covered not just my property taxes, but also my car registration! It's worth a check to see if there are any funds for you. Check each State where you have lived. If there is anything that I can do, remember I live just over the line from Maine in New Hampshire.

Josephine

Josephine Howland wrote:Travis, I'm glad that you seem to be getting to the root cause of your illness. My husband's step-father was a marine in Vietnam, and suffers from various effects of Agent Orange, his son, my husband's half-brother, also has various disorders that we believe to be from his father's exposure. Nasty stuff.  We have all been keeping you our thoughts

It is amazing that funds can sometimes arrive at the perfect time, and I hope you sell the skidder for much more than you need.  I was blessed with some much needed funds recently, when a former coworker from my Harvard days sent me a letter. He has a hobby of searching State treasury lost money accounts. He found an account that had both my father (who passed away in 2005) and my name on it. I was able to file a claim on line, scanning and sending his death certificate. It took a few months but sure enough, I got a check that covered not just my property taxes, but also my car registration! It's worth a check to see if there are any funds for you. Check each State where you have lived. If there is anything that I can do, remember I live just over the line from Maine in New Hampshire.

Josephine

Oh Josephine, I think of you often.

Since about ten years ago I have really tried to carry through when I say I am going to do something (integrity), and always felt I fell short with you. I really did try to have my wife text you that day to give you that wool, but I should have called! I felt so bad then, and still do. The sad part is that I still have that wool, now half-rotted sitting in a garage. How sad huh?

Please except my apologies for that. I really wish we had connected so that you could have gotten that wool.

As for Harvard...my Great Grandfather many times removed was the first settler of Cambridge MA. That was where we had our first sheep shearing shed as he was a tailor by trade. Our farm here in Maine came about directly because of Harvard as well. Back in in the 1600's they had 157 fireplaces to keep stoked with wood and Harvard had their own ship that sailed between Cambridge and Belfast Maine. On one trip, an ancestor that was a logger came to Maine to cut firewood and never got back on the ship. The American Indian heritage in me says he got pretty friendly inside a wigwam and why he did not return. The rest is history...

Travis, I think of you often as well, especially when I see articles about spinning, and when I check behind my husbands ear for the wound he gets from his oxygen hose rubbing there (if you remember one of the things I wanted to do was make him a wrap for his hose). You are pardoned for our missed connection, it happens. I have been selling things on FB market place Moose Hollow Farm is my page name, and people can muddle up direction like crazy. Not just buyers from Maine, but seriously the next town over! Our tiny town of Albany, NH does not have it's own zip code, everything goes through Conway. Well, as you know Route 16 goes from southern NH up to Berlin and points north. I live on route 16, If you start putting my address into a phone gps, and don't put in my town, it will bring you to Intervale NH north on North Conway at the Vista outlook! Oh the horror stories, I've heard, as well as lost sales.

It is interesting that your great-grandfather was a tailor, I am a third generation dressmaker.  This has been a bad year for me, my mom passed away in October, and it makes me very sad and lonely. I grew up sewing at my mother's knee. My grandmother taught me to draft my first pattern at age 8, and then taught me to use the sewing machine to make the garment. I still have sewing items from both my mom and my grandmother. I have a degree in Fashion design (includes pattern drafting, textile science, and printing). The head of the design department, when I graduated, said that because of my family history, there were many times that she though she learned more from me than I learned from her (Not true), I learned a lot from her in many areas. Although, with my love of reading and learning new things, my interests have spread to more areas. I was able to take several classes at Harvard while I worked there. Life takes us on many journeys, that's what makes it so interesting though. I hope that some time we can still get together. Our daughter lives in Stow, ME, and we still have to go to Maine Med sometimes.

Josephine Howland wrote:Travis, I think of you often as well, especially when I see articles about spinning, and when I check behind my husbands ear for the wound he gets from his oxygen hose rubbing there (if you remember one of the things I wanted to do was make him a wrap for his hose). You are pardoned for our missed connection, it happens. I have been selling things on FB market place Moose Hollow Farm is my page name, and people can muddle up direction like crazy. Not just buyers from Maine, but seriously the next town over! Our tiny town of Albany, NH does not have it's own zip code, everything goes through Conway. Well, as you know Route 16 goes from southern NH up to Berlin and points north. I live on route 16, If you start putting my address into a phone gps, and don't put in my town, it will bring you to Intervale NH north on North Conway at the Vista outlook! Oh the horror stories, I've heard, as well as lost sales.

It is interesting that your great-grandfather was a tailor, I am a third generation dressmaker.  This has been a bad year for me, my mom passed away in October, and it makes me very sad and lonely. I grew up sewing at my mother's knee. My grandmother taught me to draft my first pattern at age 8, and then taught me to use the sewing machine to make the garment. I still have sewing items from both my mom and my grandmother. I have a degree in Fashion design (includes pattern drafting, textile science, and printing). The head of the design department, when I graduated, said that because of my family history, there were many times that she though she learned more from me than I learned from her (Not true), I learned a lot from her in many areas. Although, with my love of reading and learning new things, my interests have spread to more areas. I was able to take several classes at Harvard while I worked there. Life takes us on many journeys, that's what makes it so interesting though. I hope that some time we can still get together. Our daughter lives in Stow, ME, and we still have to go to Maine Med sometimes.

I actually have been looking for a dressmaker for a few years now. I was talking to another good friend on here who is a dressmaker as well, but she just does not have the time to do it. What I was looking for was a costume for Katie. I am not sure if you know, but her and I often do photoshoots, but neither one of us can sew. In this photoshoot of Katie as Little Red Ridinghood, you can see we could not sew the hood onto the cloak, so we cut slits in the fabric and ran ribbon through the slits to attach the hood. In this case it worked, BUT in other situations it will not.

Being on the coast, Katie and I want to do one of her as a Little Mermaid, and went to Joanne Fabrics, found a pattern and the fabric, BUT there is no way to get around sewing. For the last few years I have wanted to give Katie a Little Mermaid Outfit for Christmas, Valentines Day or her Birthday, but again...I cannot sew. I am in no way putting you up to this, I am just explaining why I was looking for a seamstress.

As for medical issues, it is interesting that you leave Maine and come to Maine Med for your Health Care needs, while I cannot get the care I need from them and will be traveling to Dartmouth-Hitchcock Med Center in new Hampshire for mine. It really works out well though because Katie and I own a house in Lisbon New Hampshire, only an hour North of there so I can have a place to stay. In all my whining, sometimes I forget to mention how fortunate I have been in my care. Dartmouth-Hitchcock has one of the best nuero-surgeons in the country, and is located where I can stay close by.

Travis, I would love to help you with your little mermaid project! I enjoy fun costume projects, and things that stretch my imagination.  I also recently inherited a collection of Victorian clothing from a relative which I'm hoping to arrange a display/Victorian tea as a fundraiser for our local library's history room. I made myself a fun Medieval                 dress for when Scott and I had our handfasting in 2014. Not even meant to be historically accurate, just fun. He wore a kilt. https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.10203162157647170&type=3   I don't know if the photos will show up. but we should talk and get together for the mermaid project.



As far as Maine Med goes, our small hospital in North Conway has merged with Maine Med, it has all gone down hil from there, I wne there for some cardiac workups, but they disagree with the doctor here. I was clearly in A-fib here at the doctors office, but her results never made it to Maine Med. They act like I have an on/off switch to turn on my A-fib. It doesn't work like that.  

Josephine Howland wrote:Travis, I would love to help you with your little mermaid project! I enjoy fun costume projects, and things that stretch my imagination.  I also recently inherited a collection of Victorian clothing from a relative which I'm hoping to arrange a display/Victorian tea as a fundraiser for our local library's history room. I made myself a fun Medieval                 dress for when Scott and I had our handfasting in 2014. Not even meant to be historically accurate, just fun. He wore a kilt. https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.10203162157647170&type=3   I don't know if the photos will show up. but we should talk and get together for the mermaid project.



As far as Maine Med goes, our small hospital in North Conway has merged with Maine Med, it has all gone down hil from there, I wne there for some cardiac workups, but they disagree with the doctor here. I was clearly in A-fib here at the doctors office, but her results never made it to Maine Med. They act like I have an on/off switch to turn on my A-fib. It doesn't work like that.  

Very interesting on the Victorian Era clothing. As you know. we moved into this old Tiny House and as we were cleaning out the attic, we found some Victorian shoes in perfect condition, and a woman's hay from the 1930's. You are more than welcome to have the shoes as they are much to small for Katie to wear...free of course.


Also thank you for the offer about sewing Katie's Little Mermaid Outfit. As I said, we had the pattern and material for it at one time, but when we moved I never saw it, so today I am not sure where it is. I am sure in storage in the barn, but where? It is warm out today, so I might go over there and look. I cannot just buy another because in searching the internet, I just cannot find the pattern we has. Now maybe my memory is bad, but the one we had was simple, but functional. The tail fins, and tail trunk separated so that the lady could walk in the costume, her feet outside the hole, with a tether holding up the tail fins as she walked. But the top was super simple, a bandaro I think it is called, just a band of cloth around her chest, like an unfitted, unshaped bikini top if that makes sense.

But here is the thing, I tend to be a little artistic on my woodworking, and so I never went by patterns. Whenever I did my woodworking, part of the love was just having free reign. I am not sure how you are? Going to school for fashion, I could see where you might be like me and just create a look in your mind, then create it with cloth. If you are like that, then by all means, who am I to stem creativity. When a person tries to control something, they ultimate kill it, has been my experience, so I just do not do that. But I also recognize that some people really have to have something to go by. If you are like that, then I will really try to find out what happened to that sewing plan.


However, if you would like even more creative lattitude, it does not have to be a little mermaid outfit. Katie and I LOVE the 1930's era , so we have thought about doing a Bonnie and Clyde photoshoot with a 1930's truck my friend has. Other ideas include her and I as mary Poppins with me being the Chimney sweep...how Victorian is that for you? Popeye and Olive Oil, Robinhood and Maid Marian, etc...It kind of is a strange hobby, but fun too. It is harmless and cements our marriage in fun and time.

I said we like the 1930's, and we do...but one of our favorite pictures was actually depicting the 1940's at a local railroad station. The entire costume was derived from Goodwill!

I love that you and Katie enjoy dressing up. I have a poodle skirt I made myself for an event years ago. It's too small for me now, but I'm sure it would fit Katie, if you want to do a  James dean type photo shoot. I think I still have my vintage beaded sweater to match (red & white). I can do draping as well as pattern drafting. Most often pattern drafting starts with      a base pattern then you let your imagination and skill go from there. The toggle idea for the mermaid is great, sort of like a Roman Shade. WE should probably switch to purple moosegees then email to continue this conversation.

In reading Travis' account, one realises that Permies is about caring: caring for our personal bit of the earth, caring about each other and caring that other people care.  In the military we say RUOK because each one is a mate, just like here.  It take a second to to send a quick post or moosage to say just checking .......  To my mind the best thing about Permies is that we are family and we care.  Rallying to help another Permie is just what we do And without judgement.