• Post Reply Bookmark Topic Watch Topic
  • New Topic
permaculture forums growies critters building homesteading energy monies kitchen purity ungarbage community wilderness fiber arts art permaculture artisans regional education skip experiences global resources cider press projects digital market permies.com pie forums private forums all forums
this forum made possible by our volunteer staff, including ...
master stewards:
  • Anne Miller
  • Leigh Tate
  • jordan barton
  • Pearl Sutton
  • Nicole Alderman
stewards:
  • r ranson
  • paul wheaton
  • Greg Martin
master gardeners:
  • Carla Burke
  • John F Dean
  • Jay Angler
gardeners:
  • Nancy Reading
  • Mike Barkley
  • L. Johnson
  • Likes 7
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
I'm making an Apple Poll based on this thread: https://permies.com/t/60678/worst-Christmas-songs#609378. What is your least-favorite Christmas song? What one makes you cringe? Or are there a bunch you hate? Vote here!



And, if you have songs not on the list, mention them and I (or another Gardener/Steward) will add it in for you!!!
COMMENTS:
 
master steward & author
Posts: 25361
Location: Left Coast Canada
7753
4
books chicken cooking fiber arts sheep writing
  • Likes 4
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
I think this deserves a spot on the list.

Staff note (r ranson) :

And now it has one

 
pollinator
Posts: 888
Location: 6a
275
hugelkultur dog forest garden trees cooking woodworking
  • Likes 5
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
R Ranson,

That song is horrid...might be good playing at ground zero in a zombie shopping mall.  
 
Posts: 126
14
purity forest garden trees tiny house urban greening the desert
  • Likes 2
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
I nominate:

I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus

Up on the Housetop



Hate them both so much!  They get stuck in my head and I find myself singing them.  UGH.  

Why can't nice Christmas songs get stuck in my head??  
 
gardener
Posts: 1508
Location: Virginia (zone 7)
354
hugelkultur dog forest garden fish hunting trees books food preservation solar
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
Christmas Don't Be Late - by Alvin and the Chipmunks
 
steward
Posts: 12155
Location: Northern WI (zone 4)
3385
3
hunting trees books food preservation solar woodworking
  • Likes 5
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
For those who don't know how bad "Christmas Shoes" is, try to watch this uplifting video...

 
master steward
Posts: 18235
Location: Pacific Northwest
8624
7
hugelkultur kids cat duck forest garden foraging fiber arts sheep wood heat homestead
  • Likes 2
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
That Santa's Sleigh is confusing and horrible all at the same time. I watched it with my husband (a musician) and our 4 year old son.

My husband's running commentary, said with utter revulsion and astonishment: "Someone took acid and sat down at a keyboard. This song does not know where it's going.
It's a musical blender. It's like they took parts of Halloween music and Christmas music and put them together. It doesn't know what it's trying to be. It's a train wreck."

My son, on the other hand: "I want to watch it again."

I guess we know who the target audience is!

EDIT: Forgot to mention that I added in the songs people mentioned.
 
Scott Foster
pollinator
Posts: 888
Location: 6a
275
hugelkultur dog forest garden trees cooking woodworking
  • Likes 1
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator

Nicole Alderman wrote:That Santa's Sleigh is confusing and horrible all at the same time. I watched it with my husband (a musician) and our 4 year old son.

My husband's running commentary, said with utter revulsion and astonishment: "Someone took acid and sat down at a keyboard. This song does not know where it's going.
It's a musical blender. It's like they took parts of Halloween music and Christmas music and put them together. It doesn't know what it's trying to be. It's a train wreck."

My son, on the other hand: "I want to watch it again."

I guess we know who the target audience is!

EDIT: Forgot to mention that I added in the songs people mentioned.



Thanks for the pie
 
Posts: 9002
Location: Victoria British Columbia-Canada
692
  • Likes 1
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
Baby its cold outside, never heard that no means no.

They are playing Christmas music in the prisons next week.  Part of the punishment.

When asked when they'd know it's over, in the early 80s,  Keith Richards, of The Rolling Stones, said,  "When we make a Christmas album."  This was not long after that horrible live aid thing and a Springsteen embarrassment.
 
Dale Hodgins
Posts: 9002
Location: Victoria British Columbia-Canada
692
  • Likes 1
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
Santa Claus has got the Aids this year.  Tiny Tim
 
Karen Donnachaidh
gardener
Posts: 1508
Location: Virginia (zone 7)
354
hugelkultur dog forest garden fish hunting trees books food preservation solar
  • Likes 1
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
Jingle bells (the barking dog version)
Ding-a-ling the Christmas bell
I want a hippopotamus for Christmas
'Thistle-hair' the Christmas bear
I'm getting nuttin' for Christmas
Redneck 12 days of Christmas
 
Karen Donnachaidh
gardener
Posts: 1508
Location: Virginia (zone 7)
354
hugelkultur dog forest garden fish hunting trees books food preservation solar
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
Those aren't aids, they're elves. 🎅
 
Dale Hodgins
Posts: 9002
Location: Victoria British Columbia-Canada
692
  • Likes 2
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
I was thinking about the sick minds that create this stuff. And I realized that their efforts have been rather lackluster.

Here is my version of the worst Christmas song ever.

A five-year-old Michael Jackson sings that he saw Mommy doing a lot more than Kissing Santa Claus under the Christmas tree. Then we hear two shotgun blasts, as mr. Jackson blows them away.

They reanimate into Christmas zombies. The rest of the song has the appearance of Thriller, as the corpses reanimate, creating Christmas zombies. All of the children get in on the act of hacking the heads off of the zombies, with garden implements. I think there should be a video.
 
r ranson
master steward & author
Posts: 25361
Location: Left Coast Canada
7753
4
books chicken cooking fiber arts sheep writing
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
You thought Santa's super sleigh was bad...


 

What's even worse, is I have this on cassette tape.  
Staff note (r ranson) :

added to the list

 
Karen Donnachaidh
gardener
Posts: 1508
Location: Virginia (zone 7)
354
hugelkultur dog forest garden fish hunting trees books food preservation solar
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
My 6 song suggestions from earlier today have yet to hit the poll. 😶
Staff note (Nicole Alderman) :

Added now!

 
pollinator
Posts: 4696
Location: Zones 2-4 Wyoming and 4-5 Colorado
475
3
hugelkultur forest garden fungi books bee greening the desert
  • Likes 1
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
Staff note (Nicole Alderman) :

Added!

 
Miles Flansburg
pollinator
Posts: 4696
Location: Zones 2-4 Wyoming and 4-5 Colorado
475
3
hugelkultur forest garden fungi books bee greening the desert
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
Staff note (Nicole Alderman) :

Added!

 
pollinator
Posts: 195
Location: Youngstown, Ohio
70
forest garden urban bike
  • Likes 1
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
I can't stand "Last Christmas" by Wham.  I don't really like much Christmas music period but this one actually made my head whip around at work much to the glee of Christmas music lovers, although they did agree to change station after that.  :)
 
Posts: 6
Location: latitude 30.63 NW FL in hardiness zone 8b
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator

Nicole Alderman wrote:I'm making an Apple Poll based on this thread: https://permies.com/t/60678/worst-Christmas-songs#609378. What is your least-favorite Christmas song? What one makes you cringe? Or are there a bunch you hate? Vote here!

[applepoll]

And, if you have songs not on the list, mention them and I (or another Gardener/Steward) will add it in for you!!!



I got an email inviting me to this forum, I read through the list and when I saw "Chipmunks Roasting On An Open Fire" I had to google it because never heard of it, after finding lyrics and reading I was appalled, joke or not, NOT funny to me. I hate that on more than any others. Even if some others on the list are considered cheezy by some or fuddy duddy, at least they are in a happy spirit of holidays.
 
r ranson
master steward & author
Posts: 25361
Location: Left Coast Canada
7753
4
books chicken cooking fiber arts sheep writing
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator

maggie leiterman wrote:
... I read through the list and when I saw "Chipmunks Roasting On An Open Fire" I had to google it because never heard of it, after finding lyrics and reading I was appalled, joke or not, NOT funny to me. ...



Yeh, that song creeped me out as a kid.  I'm still not good with it.

The only one I found more disturbing as a kid (and maybe as an adult) is the one where some big judgemental bloke is watching me sleeping and awake and even reads my mind.  Stranger Danger was a big thing where I was growing up and more than one of my schoolmates ended up missing or worse.  I was taught from an early age to be wary of strange men watching me.  And here there is this one in a funny suit watching me sleep and there's nothing I can do about it.  Many nightmares.  



 
Nicole Alderman
master steward
Posts: 18235
Location: Pacific Northwest
8624
7
hugelkultur kids cat duck forest garden foraging fiber arts sheep wood heat homestead
  • Likes 1
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator

Cris Fellows wrote:I can't stand "Last Christmas" by Wham.  I don't really like much Christmas music period but this one actually made my head whip around at work much to the glee of Christmas music lovers, although they did agree to change station after that.  :)



UGH. I hate that one, too. Thankfully I haven't heard it for a few years, therefor why it wasn't on the list. It is now!
 
pollinator
Posts: 509
Location: San Diego, California
94
forest garden trees rabbit chicken food preservation building woodworking greening the desert
  • Likes 1
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
Dominic the Christmas Donkey - I'm assuming it's a cultural favorite SOMEWHERE, but I can't stand it - HEEHAWW!!!
Staff note (Nicole Alderman) :

Added!

 
pollinator
Posts: 379
84
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator

Miles Flansburg wrote:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n3M7IR6jkpc


Now that is the worst one for sure.
 
gardener
Posts: 513
Location: In view of the Chiricahua Mountains, AZ
295
3
dog duck forest garden fish fungi chicken cooking bee greening the desert
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
My husband just said that the dog Jingle Bells one is the worst for him, and then the 12 days of Christmas - in any version.  He also said, "The 12 days  song is basically the Christmas version of '100 Bottles of Beer on the Wall'".  ha!
 
pollinator
Posts: 169
Location: Wisconsin, Zone 4b
48
4
kids books homestead
  • Likes 2
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
Probably not the worst one, maybe not even on the list of the worst hundred, but I've never much cared for Merry Christmas From the Family by Montgomery Gentry.

Staff note (Nicole Alderman) :

Added to the poll!

 
Posts: 2
1
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
Jan Terri's 'Excuse My Christmas' has got to be up there with the worst!

 
Posts: 30
Location: Livingston, MT (Zone 4B)
12
4
homeschooling kids foraging composting toilet food preservation homestead
  • Likes 1
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
Barbara Striesands version of jingle bells has to be the worst song that was supposed to actually be good.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Nq0CuUKTjc
 
Posts: 124
Location: Ontario, climate zone 3a
44
forest garden personal care food preservation composting toilet wood heat homestead
  • Likes 1
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
I realize this is a very late contender (like three years too late) but I cannot express how much I absolutely loathe "Do They Know It's Christmastime".  It's an incredibly narrow and stigmatizing view of Africa that continues to be perpetuated by this drivel played over and over every year, painting all of Africa as a barren hellscape with people incapable of caring for themselves.  I honestly think it needs to be banned.  Not to mention that from a Christian perspective, some of the first cultures to recognize Christianity before the intrusion of Rome were in North Africa, so the supposition that they don't know it's Christmas is double-edged ignorance, not only for those cultures who are Christian, but for those which aren't and don't need this drivel shoved down their throats, or to get aid solely on a single religious basis.... man I must be a real snowflake because I'm TRIGGERED LOL

 
Molly Kay
pollinator
Posts: 169
Location: Wisconsin, Zone 4b
48
4
kids books homestead
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
Remembered another one. Where Are You Christmas? by Faith Hill. I don't like the version by the kid either. Terrible song! Even Charlie Brown never got that depressed.
 
steward
Posts: 2839
Location: Maine, zone 5
1416
3
forest garden trees food preservation solar wood heat homestead
  • Likes 2
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
Just heard this one on the radio this morning.  If you managed to get all the way through it let me know with a thumbs up (just curious how many can make it!).  Good luck.
 
pollinator
Posts: 231
Location: Idaho
124
2
  • Likes 3
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
Greg,

I managed to get through it just because it was a challenge. I think I might have hurt my brain, my mind, and my head. The less said about hearing damage the better, but you can say it because of, you know, hearing damage. I won't mind.

The cats woke up and ran to the other part of the house. They might decide being feral and hungry is not so bad.

This has to be, without question in my mind, the WORST song in existence. Thanks Greg. Now I need to find another horrible song to drive that one out of my head.  The Snoopy vs. the Red Baron song usually works.
 
Greg Martin
steward
Posts: 2839
Location: Maine, zone 5
1416
3
forest garden trees food preservation solar wood heat homestead
  • Likes 1
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator

Robin Katz wrote:I managed to get through it just because it was a challenge. I think I might have hurt my brain, my mind, and my head. The less said about hearing damage the better, but you can say it because of, you know, hearing damage. I won't mind.

The cats woke up and ran to the other part of the house. They might decide being feral and hungry is not so bad.

This has to be, without question in my mind, the WORST song in existence. Thanks Greg. Now I need to find another horrible song to drive that one out of my head.  The Snoopy vs. the Red Baron song usually works.


Let me know what works Robin....it's rolling as background music in the back of my head and I'm scared!
 
Posts: 59
8
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
I'm going to sound like a horrible person but.. I despise ALL Christmas songs. It's same-o, same-o every year!
Regardless of how the tune might have changed, I "see red" and avoid going anywhere just so I'm not forced to listen to this crap.
Just a little side note: I like the lights, dressed up trees, (some) decorations .
I might have liked some x-mas song if let's say... Led Zeppelin ever made any. Or maybe not?  
 
Greg Martin
steward
Posts: 2839
Location: Maine, zone 5
1416
3
forest garden trees food preservation solar wood heat homestead
  • Likes 3
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator

Ela La Salle wrote:I might have liked some x-mas song if let's say... Led Zeppelin ever made any. Or maybe not?  


Are you feeling it Ela? (or maybe not?)  😋
 
pollinator
Posts: 1201
Location: Southern Oregon
341
  • Likes 3
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
The worst Christmas song to my mind is "Do they know it's Christmas" by Band-Aid (concert, I think). It's just so offensive.
Staff note (Nicole Alderman) :

Added!

 
Molly Kay
pollinator
Posts: 169
Location: Wisconsin, Zone 4b
48
4
kids books homestead
  • Likes 3
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
I hate, with a passion (a passion, I tell you!) Where Are You Christmas? by Faith Hill. Nothing against Faith. I'd hate it no matter who made the commercial recording. I didn't like it in the movie, sung by the kid either.

Some of these songs are bad on purpose, and I don't think that should count. It's far more tragic when someone tries their best to write a good song and ends up writing a stinker.
 
Posts: 23
Location: The soggy side of Washington
5
goat books food preservation
  • Likes 4
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
Unless I missed it, nobody has mentioned "New Kids got ran over by a reindeer".  Truly a classic to forget. On that note, I spent one winter on a turn-around in an oil refinery. My job was to watch other people work. We all had radios and another safety watch and I came up with a number of "refinery Christmas carols" to keep ourselves occupied while we shivered 75 feet up a tower. So, if I may impose on you,  2 of my favorites, please sing along in your head.....

To the tune of "Favorite Things"
Acid and caustic and hydrogen sulfide
Benzene and argon and carbon monoxide
Flammable items and hazards they bring
These are a few of my favorite things

Oxy-acetylene torches are real nice, but
They just don't compare with sulfur dioxide
Scaffolding nails and big gasket rings
These are a few of my favorite things

When the rain falls
When the wind blows
These things make me glad
They stir up the toxins and poisonous gasses
And then I don't feeeeeeeel so bad

Towers aplenty and great big exchangers
L.E.L. monitors catching the dangers
Hazardous vapors make me want to sing
These are a few of my favorite things

Airlines and steam traps and forklifts are okay
But what makes me happy are 12 hour workdays
Using the crane hook to make a big swing
These are a few of my favorite things!


To the tune of Winter Wonderland
Sirens scream, are you listening?
Everywhere, oil is glistening
I'm starting to glow, get out of the hole
Walking in a toxic wonderland

Did you wear your respirator?
If not, you'll be very sorry later
The permits are gone but there's hotwork going on
Walking in a toxic wonderland

X-ray tape is all over the units
Barricades are untagged and ignored
Raining down is green and yellow fluid
Operators yelling "OH MY LORD"

Look there, the flames are climbing higher
Let's throw a few more welders on the fire
We'll crank up the flare, there's caustic everywhere
Working in a toxic wonderland

(Disclaimer-I have nothing against welders, beautiful people. I just needed it to follow a rhythm)

Staff note (Nicole Alderman) :

Added to the poll!

 
pollinator
Posts: 538
Location: OK High Plains Prairie, 23" rain avg
87
cattle forest garden trees tiny house composting toilet building homestead
  • Likes 2
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator
O god... Worst ever. Stevie Wonder sings Ave Maria.
Staff note (Nicole Alderman) :

Added to the poll!

 
Ela La Salle
Posts: 59
8
  • Likes 2
  • Mark post as helpful
  • send pies
    Number of slices to send:
    Optional 'thank-you' note:
  • Quote
  • Report post to moderator

Greg Martin wrote:

Ela La Salle wrote:I might have liked some x-mas song if let's say... Led Zeppelin ever made any. Or maybe not?  


Are you feeling it Ela? (or maybe not?)  😋

Wow! I felt a little "tingle" at 5:16 LOL (Smart ass 😋 )
Thanks, THAT sounds (actually) cute. LOL

 
Bras cause cancer. And tiny ads:
Work/Trade for the 2022 PDC, PTJ, and SKIP events
https://permies.com/t/166040/experiences/Work-Trade-PDC-PTJ-SKIP
reply
    Bookmark Topic Watch Topic
  • New Topic