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You know you're a permie when...

 
master steward
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Kristine Keeney wrote:
I have those plants in my yard! I keep looking at them and thinking that they're something Good And Useful, but I can't reach the part of my mind that tells me what they are!! Oh, the frustration!
Please, put this poor, brain addled person out of their misery - the plants with the tiny white flowers - what are they?



Maybe bittercress? Also called "shot weed"

hairy bittercress shot weed
picture of bittercress from University of Maryland. Click picture to go to the site


picture of itty-bitty bittercress from Organic Plant Care LLC
 
pollinator
Posts: 252
Location: New Braunfels, TX, Zone 8b, multi-generational suburban homestead
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Kristine Keeney wrote:

Nancy Reading wrote:When everything you're weeding out of the polytunnel to make space for planting (yacon, jerusalem artichoke (sunchoke), chinese artichoke) is self sown and edible.

Chickweed, claytonia, fat hen, kale, parsely

Admitedly there were a couple of docks (but you can eat them too!)



I have those plants in my yard! I keep looking at them and thinking that they're something Good And Useful, but I can't reach the part of my mind that tells me what they are!! Oh, the frustration!
Please, put this poor, brain addled person out of their misery - the plants with the tiny white flowers - what are they?



Tiny white flowers... Queen Anne’s Lace? Do the flowers turn to sticker burs?
 
master gardener
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Kristine Keeney wrote:

Nancy Reading wrote:When everything you're weeding out of the polytunnel to make space for planting (yacon, jerusalem artichoke (sunchoke), chinese artichoke) is self sown and edible.

Chickweed, claytonia, fat hen, kale, parsely

Admitedly there were a couple of docks (but you can eat them too!)



I have those plants in my yard! I keep looking at them and thinking that they're something Good And Useful, but I can't reach the part of my mind that tells me what they are!! Oh, the frustration!
Please, put this poor, brain addled person out of their misery - the plants with the tiny white flowers - what are they?


I always remember chickweed as Stellaria (S. media) due to the cute white star like flowers.  Is that the one you were thinking of Kristine?
 
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Make up; I gave up make up a lloonngg time ago. Its always been expensive for my budget to get anything that wouldn't break me out.

The rest, I need either for work, or to keep me being nicey wicey to other people, hence the coffee...*LOL*
 
gardener
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Greg, Kristine,
Yes Stellaria media I know as chickweed.  It is an annual that readily self sows.  As a 'weed' it's a wee bit annoying, since the stems tend to break, leaving the roots to re grow.  I have some lovely large leaved tender ones in the polytunnel, which I am picking for salad greens at the moment.  You can also cut the whole plant and cook it like spinach, although the stems tend to be a bit stringy.  Very bland taste, good for people who don't like greens!
 
master pollinator
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Greg Martin wrote:

Kristine Keeney wrote:
I have those plants in my yard! I keep looking at them and thinking that they're something Good And Useful, but I can't reach the part of my mind that tells me what they are!! Oh, the frustration!
Please, put this poor, brain addled person out of their misery - the plants with the tiny white flowers - what are they?


I always remember chickweed as Stellaria (S. media) due to the cute white star like flowers.  Is that the one you were thinking of Kristine?


Howdy!
Yes, those are the ones I was thinking of. They are, unfortunately not the ones I *meant* to be thinking of.
*Insert "So *that's* what chickweed looks like!" comment here*

I so greatly appreciate your assistance in this. I thank all of you for your help. (And new websites for identification of suddenly mysterious plants.)
The ones that have been driving me nuts for the past couple of days have tiny yellow flowers, but I have taken pictures (probably to just create a permanent list somewhere online so I can have a reasonably easy to access portable brain about this topic, and also have realized that I have no idea where I put the photos that I have taken and really am not looking forward to looking for them on two devices an through way too many files and pictures of things). Argh. I had a working brain. I can swear I just set it down for a minute.
I'll go back and see if I can create a site for all of my brain fuzzles, and therefore know where to find answers.
 
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When all your friends and house guest use the coffee can next to the toilet to pee in and bring it out to the compost pile without you asking. Knowing they are welcome to come raid the garden if they do so
 
gardener
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When you find yourself thinking, "Sure, there's lots of insects and worms here already (probably cause of many, many bags of leaves and mountains of mulch). But how can we get more?"

When you finally get chickens and you're just as excited about the poop and associated possibilities for growth as you are about the eggs.
 
Nicole Alderman
master steward
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Heather Sharpe wrote:When you find yourself thinking, "Sure, there's lots of insects and worms here already (probably cause of many, many bags of leaves and mountains of mulch). But how can we get more?"



When you were thinking the same thing yesterday (but about bees and butterflies), and were going to post it in this thread!
 
gardener & hugelmaster
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... when you have to explain why in the world you traveled thousands of miles with a walking onion & then answer what the heck is it now doing in a big pile of goat poo?

The answer seems obvious. Right?
and-so-it-begins.jpg
[Thumbnail for and-so-it-begins.jpg]
 
steward & bricolagier
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... when you debate pulling up a plant you planted because there's an interesting looking volunteer coming up by it.
 
Pearl Sutton
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And when you get grandbaby pics from your female friends, and they are animals!
Yay baby goats and ducks!  

That's grandbaby pics I understand
:D
 
Kristine Keeney
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When you spend the day visiting the doctor with and doing odd chores for your elderly relative, and they understand the container full of old food and scraps that you'll be taking home is easily the best thank you ever.
And you get home to find out your chickens aren't thrilled by Brussels sprouts, but will eat them anyway.
 
Kristine Keeney
master pollinator
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Pearl Sutton wrote:And when you get grandbaby pics from your female friends, and they are animals!
Yay baby goats and ducks!  

That's grandbaby pics I understand
:D


And the baby critters are easily cuter than many children, plus they don't cause existential crisises (crisi? Deep  depressed thinking times.).
IMG_20210526_185829930.jpg
My grandbaby gosling and it's adopted Mom, Hattie Dorking (one of the few hens who's earned a name)
My grandbaby gosling and it's adopted Mom, Hattie Dorking (one of the few hens who's earned a name)
 
Nicole Alderman
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When the guy comes to install a new satellite internet dish, and your son wants to show him the baby chicks and feed him sweet cicily seed pods...
 
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I love this one ❤️
 
steward
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...you halt your luncheon preparations to examine a bug in the bathroom.

What could the tiny thing be? Oh!! A book scorpion!! (Aka psuedoscorpion. )

Then, still pausing things with guests arriving any minute, you do your best to carefully capture the cagey fellow, take some photos, and send one to your cousin the beekeeper whom you told all about these beneficial varroa mite predators last year.

Only after releasing the book scorpion outside do you happily return to your bathroom tidying.

Here's a thread and my post with more about my little friend:  
https://permies.com/t/54202/Book-Scorpions-Varroa-destructor-control#1270559

(As in "Say hello to my little friend!" Bwahaha!)

 
Pearl Sutton
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When you argue with seed packets.
"Plant in average garden soil in full sun, thin to 12 inches apart, give one inch of water per week. "
Well now. How does that bug me? Let me count the ways...

"Average garden soil" is exactly what? How much organic material has been added, what was the composition to start with, how many worms per cubic foot, how much fungi?

"In full sun" full sun in New Mexico or full sun in Montana, full sun with absolutely nothing near it or shaded by a bush part of the day, what about near a trellis that may or may not have plants on it, what exact microclimate would be best?

"Thin to 12 inches apart" thinning plants wastes seeds, plant them at the spacing you want in the first place and infill if needed! Does it actually need that much room all by itself, what about flowers or garlic near it, what does it do if you crowd it, what if you run it up a trellis, does mulch change the equation, ?

"Give one inch of water per week" we get back to how much organic material is in the soil, what if it's on a hugel, what if it's shaded more, will it put out decent roots with that much water, what if you add fungi to the soil, what does mulch do to that equation?


"Plant in average garden soil in full sun, thin to 12 inches apart, give one inch of water per week. "
Quoth the Permie: It depends!

:D
 
Greg Martin
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Ok Pearl, up to the challenge of writing the description from a Permies packet of seeds?

I know for me, my spring planting all too often is something like "don't start the indoor seeds too soon" and "get these seeds tucked into the soil and you'll be so happy after!"
 
Mike Barkley
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... on the same day as planting 50-60 bells peppers with another 20-30 yet to go you have a bell pepper for dinner. Then save the seeds because ... seeds!

... you find a worm while digging in goat poo. Then carefully move the worm & some goat poo to a new Ruth Stout composting area.

... when you are very late planting this year & still have a lot of empty space to fill & soil that needs a lot more organic matter. No time to waste waiting on deliveries of bulk seed so you wonder how many packages of 16 bean soup the grocery store has. So you can chop & drop them later.
 
pollinator
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You know you're a permie when...

You are moving and everything is in boxes in storage except your seeds which you refuse to let out of your sight.  When you miss your garden, you get out the seeds and "re-organise" the boxes to make yourself feel better.  
 
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Your dog wakes you up to see the skunk.

 
Kim Huse
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Re:  refusing to let your seeds out of your sight and reorganizing them : I have actually done this!
 
Kristine Keeney
master pollinator
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Heck, yeah! Re-organizing and fondling seeds is a thing. Did it today, as a matter of fact. It helped me to deal with Life a little and plan out the next bed I'll be digging.
Now to hope the woad I found in the bottom of a stack of pots will grow.

You know you're in a Permies mindset when:
      You send a friend a photo of last year's "Burn pile" and ask, joking, what does a burn pile become if you never burn it - and your friend answers with "A hugel", then suggests tossing a handful of dried beans that are going to the chickens *anyway* (thanks weevils :( ) onto it just to see what happens. And you think about it and then, after doing some pantry clearing - a goodly amount of the non-weevil-ridden beans somehow ends up back there because why not?
     The weevil ridden beans are going to the chickens. They will deal with them appropriately.

       You decide, because you are a glutton for punishment, apparently, to invite the local children over to learn to become Junior Animal Handlers and Plant Experts because you used to do a far less structured program for a local arboretum and a Natural History Museum summer program. And they bring their own adult, with them, so .. How hard can it be?

        And then you remember that you don't have an "instant camera" anymore, but are hopeful you can do the whole critter adoption thing instead of the "Adopt a Tree", because there are only so many trees, but there are enough chickens everyone can have one.  But now you have to come up with chicken related activities that are somewhat educational (perfect timing on the feather paintbrushes and homemade paints!).
        And the kids can work with the half-grown pullets, so maybe it'll all work out for the best (?)...
       
        Argh. I guess speaking to children will be good diction practice and tongue control. And I should be able to get a lot of little things done while the children are "helping".
         
 
Kristine Keeney
master pollinator
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And my response to many of those instructions is like my response to the experts in the books when they state a critter "will always (X)", and then critter doesn't (X). I read the instructions to the critter, or seeds, and then go ahead with common sense.
Or lack of common sense and just open a whole handful of old seed packets and scatter them in the yard - best case scenario? Some of them find a spot and grow. Worst case scenario? None of the find a spot, or they ALL find a spot.

You know you're a Permie when:
   The wild birds brought you a chili pequin plant at some point since the warmer weather started, and you catch your chickens denuding the poor thing, so you leave it where it is, but put a hardware cloth ring around.
 
pollinator
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You know you’re a permie when... you finish filling out a local government Ag survey and realize that you’ve filled in the “other” option with little essays, pictures, and links explaining it in almost two thirds of the questions.
 
Heather Sharpe
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You tell yourself that you're going to keep one area of your garden weeded for the sake of the less competitive annual plants. And at first you do, but then you find a dandelion and decide it can stay, since there's not enough of those in the yard. Then decide a lone jewelweed can stay for the same reason. Then several wood sorrel plants, cause that's edible and easy to keep in check by eating it. Then some kind of aster, because the pollinators like it...It's still the most "normal" looking part of the garden though, so partial success.

Upon finding a particularly glorious dandelion, you build a stick fence around it so the groundhog doesn't eat it.
 
Rebecca Blake
pollinator
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Heather Sharpe wrote: Upon finding a particularly glorious dandelion, you build a stick fence around it so the groundhog doesn't eat it.



I can’t stop laughing at “particularly glorious dandelion”!

I’m just imaging a dandelion wearing the finest rubies with a crown a top its head- so marvelous that it has a natural glow to it.
 
pollinator
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When you are on vacation for about two weeks and your little 2 year old boy keeps rubbing your hands.  He just kept rubbing and suddenly said "daddy hands".  I said "what's wrong bud" He said "daddy hands clean".  He had never seen my hands without stains before!
 
Kristine Keeney
master pollinator
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Howdy!
This caught my attention to where I had to catch myself before doing something unforgivable in MSPaint or some other photo/image editing program.
I love the mood behind "a particularly glorious dandelion".
Dandelion-Picture.jpeg.jpg
A particularly Glorious Dandelion
A particularly Glorious Dandelion
 
author & gardener
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You know you’re a permie when, instead of buying plastic trash bags, you repurpose empty feed bags for trash.
 
Christopher Shepherd
pollinator
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When people brag about how hard they work until they shake your hand.
 
pollinator
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Leigh Tate wrote:You know you’re a permie when, instead of buying plastic trash bags, you repurpose empty feed bags for trash.



... and empty them out at the landfill (once or twice a year) to reuse again ...
 
Kristine Keeney
master pollinator
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Leigh Tate wrote:
You know you’re a permie when, instead of buying plastic trash bags, you repurpose empty feed bags for trash.



Douglas Alpenstock

... and empty them out at the landfill (once or twice a year) to reuse again ...  



- or use them for that stuff that regular trashbags can't handle, then repurpose them into stylish totes/shopping bags since they are tougher than the non-woven fabric mess of a "reusable bag" some stores sell, and can hold a good 50 pounds of whatever you can fit in them.
 
Christopher Shepherd
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The thread Permie Gifts for a 1-Year-Old brings some fun memories back.  My son was extremely mobil at the age of one and ate everything. He could walk right under the rabbit pens.

"When your 1 year old thinks rabbits are the best animal, because they leave wonderful MMs all over the ground."

I would yell at him "spit that out" as the hay hung from his lips from getting a whole handful stuffed in his mouth.  Then not thinking use my fingers to clean his mouth out.  It probably was better to just let him eat them tasty MMs then putting my chore fingers in his mouth.

You all don't worry he just turned 17, so I think he is going to make it.
 
Jocelyn Campbell
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When you've been meaning to hang pictures and paintings on the walls for months, but this goes up in like 30 seconds.

(And the art is still in the storage room!)
Herbs-hanging-to-dry.jpg
Herbs hanging to dry in the living room.
Herbs hanging to dry in the living room.
 
Kristine Keeney
master pollinator
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Howdy!

Jocelyn Campbell : When you've been meaning to hang pictures and paintings on the walls for months, but this goes up in like 30 seconds.
(And the art is still in the storage room!)


What's the rush? We've only lived here for almost 18 years, we still haven't figured out where we want to put the "Love Me" wall, or all the assorted family pictures, and other art. The maps are up. And the calendar. What more could you want?
Loving the herb bundles.

You know you're a Permie when: you use your "guest bedroom" for extra storage under the bed, extra blankets and bedding on the bed, and drying herbs, or extra storage in the closet.  
 
Pearl Sutton
steward & bricolagier
Posts: 7968
Location: SW Missouri
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When you have lots of thoughts about mulching this morning:

When you pick the appropriate mulch for each area, depending on how much water it gets/needs, the weed pressure, the amount of that type of mulch left, and the type of mulch that's already there. "Let's see, you get shredded leaves, you get whole leaves, and all of you can have rotted straw!"

When you have been on your knees mulching, put your hand in your pocket, and ew, a slug!!

When you are making sure to get all the worms you can as you move mulch, and you sing them songs!
To "the worms crawl in the worms crawl out":
The worms get scooped, the worms come to play,
The worms don't know that it's moving day!
Don't wiggle and fight, I'm glad you don't bite,
I swear you will like your new homesite!

:D


 
Kristine Keeney
master pollinator
Posts: 181
Location: South-southeast Texas, technically the "Golden Crescent", zone 9a
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Loving the earthworm song!

When you have a minor moral crisis about pulling *that* "weed" when you know it's a wild grain plant and will give the vining squash something to climb.

When you feel just a little guilty for not mulching  planted areas because you're planning to use shredded paper, but you haven't shredded any yet, let alone enough to cover a plot.

When you realize that you're saving odd boxes because they're a Really Good Box, glass containers because they're easy to sterilize, and bulk mail papers for the shredding you aren't doing, yet.

When you are looking over your yard and trying to decide if you should cut down a volunteer tree for the wood to build a "chicken broody pen", or leave it until Fall so the chickens can use the shade during July and August
 
Pearl Sutton
steward & bricolagier
Posts: 7968
Location: SW Missouri
3823
goat cat fungi books chicken earthworks food preservation cooking building homestead ungarbage
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When you bump a garlic plant in he garden, break a stalk,, apologize to it, and stick the broken piece into your pouch and add it to breakfast.
 
Paper jam tastes about as you would expect. Try some on this tiny ad:
The Wheaton Eco Scale
https://permies.com/t/scale
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