Ruin a Wish- A Game.

Granted. The sand will be fine, soft and delicious to walk on but it will also   blow into your home at the whiff of a breeze and you are doomed to forever sweeping it out for it will blow into every horizontal surface and every nook and cranny of your home.

Now, meeee....I wish for someone to take away all my excess stuff so I can truly be the minimalist I yearn to be instead of the recyclist I am currently

Granted!  You only needed one kidney, right?

I wish that the weather forecast would actually be correct for the next 72 hours so I could plan my homestead work a bit better.

GRANTED.

Tomorrow you will have a hot day...we're talking insane heat. 45 degrees in the shade, with humidity that makes it feel like you're in a steam cooker. Overnight, a monsoon rain will set in and by the end of the next day you will have had 450 mm of rain relentlessly pounding down and flooding everywhere. But don't worry, on the third day a polar vortex will move across and drop the temperature to 40 below, freezing everything nice and solid. So getting around will be easy again.

I wish insurance companies would honour their own agreements.

Phil Stevens wrote: I wish insurance companies would honour their own agreements.

Granted! All insurance companies begin honoring their agreements. However, their business plan was not setup to handle that type of payout, which means that exactly 17 days after this begins, they all go bankrupt. Now you have no insurance at all.

I wish my cat would stop leaving half-eaten carcasses all over the driveway.

granted! your cat will now only eat a third of each carcass.

i wish i had an extra couple hours every day

greg mosser wrote:granted! i had an extra couple hours every day

You now have two extra hours in the day, but every hour is a little shorter to accommodate the change...
(personally, I'd have gone for fewer, but longer hours so we had 20 hours/day, and minutes/hour based on 100, but the mess it would cause to change that now... not worth thinking about! )


I wish there was an easy way to get Himalayan Blackberry roots out of heavy clay soil.

Jay Angler wrote:I wish there was an easy way to get Himalayan Blackberry roots out of heavy clay soil.

Granted! A massive deluge of rain came, and washed them all away. Unfortunately, it took away all the plants you wanted to keep, too.

I wish there were natural paths between the blackberries and everything else I want to forage!

Carla Burke wrote:
I wish there were natural paths between the blackberries and everything else I want to forage!

First, let’s acknowledge the irony of asking a super-natural being(genie/djinn) for something “natural”, and then let’s go for it:
That said, we’ll take natural to mean anything not “super-natural”, and grab Bubba over here with his petrochemical sprayer to make some nice clear paths for you.


. . .  I’m not sure if I’d forage any of that any more, that’s just me though.


I wish my neurodivergence didn’t make it so difficult to deal with my sons neurodivergence.

Andrew Harvey wrote:

I wish my neurodivergence didn’t make it so difficult to deal with my sons neurodivergence.

Granted! You now have 100% compatible neurodivergences, ergo you also have detriments in the exact same areas. Consequently, neither of you even notice your shared blind spot, so those things that fall into the blind spot are never addressed unless an outside agent intervenes.

I wish I did not have any food intolerances or allergies

Granted! ...but only as long as you don't have any food.

I wish that all the marginally hardy plants we planted in our future forest garden will, against all expectations, thrive.

Eino Kenttä wrote:I wish that all the marginally hardy plants we planted in our future forest garden will, against all expectations, thrive.

Granted! Yay climate change. Climate change happens way faster than expected and you jump up three zones. Now all the stuff you thought was marginal grows perfectly! Unfortunately the staples you were counting on now find it too hot and you can’t keep them watered, and they don’t get adequate dormancy to thrive so they all die. Boo!

I wish that when they forecast moisture for my property it wouldn’t all seem to just miss me and I would get at least the generally expected amount of moisture for my region.

I wish that when they forecast moisture for my property it wouldn’t all seem to just miss me and I would get at least the generally expected amount of moisture for my region.

Granted! You now get the general expected moisture for your region wherever you are. Only where you are. Which means you have to go stand in a different part of your property during each storm to get even coverage on your gardens. Also the floors in your house start to rot from all the extra moisture following you around.

I wish that no frost would collect on my car during the winter so I won't have to scrape or warm it up first all the time.

I wish that no frost would collect on my car during the winter so I won't have to scrape or warm it up first all the time.

Granted! Back to back ice storms for the entire winter turn your car into an iceberg that just sits in your driveway, as the roads are solid ice too and cannot be driven on.

I wish a large amount of good clean leaves delivered themselves neatly to the garden beds.

I wish a large amount of good clean leaves delivered themselves neatly to the garden beds.

Granted!You have a lovely thick layer of leaves... unfortunately there's enough vine attached to the leaves that they've all put down roots so now you'll have to dig them all out in the spring!

I wish I had a warm, dry, rat-proof place to do some awesome wood-working during this dark, wet winter.

Jay Angler wrote:
I wish I had a warm, dry, rat-proof place to do some awesome wood-working during this dark, wet winter.

Granted! Unfortunately to keep the rats out of the wood working area it reeks of cat pee so badly that it burns your nose, and makes your eyes water.

I wish for the motivation to finish all my projects.

Peter E Johnson wrote:I wish for the motivation to finish all my projects.

Granted! Your discipline is now perfect, but we had to put your brain in a jar to get things that way and now it's harder to rake the leaves, etc.

I wish I was better at selecting presents for people.

Christopher Weeks wrote:
I wish I was better at selecting presents for people.

Granted now everyone lines up to receive presents from you...everyone.

I Wish I always felt safe.

Tina Wolf wrote:

I Wish I always felt safe.

Yes! You’ve lost your fear instinct. So when you are in mortal danger, you feel the same way as after a good meal.

I wish for peace, harmony, and friendship among all the earth’s peoples.

Maieshe Ljin wrote:I wish for peace, harmony, and friendship among all the earth’s peoples.

Granted! But the only way we could work that out was to get rid of all the people...no more squabbling!

I wish I had a nice big heated greenhouse so I could garden more seriously in the winter.

Christopher Weeks wrote:
I wish I had a nice big heated greenhouse so I could garden more seriously in the winter.

Granted! High levels of CO2 and other greenhouse gases mean that Earth’s temperature is now 8C warmer on average.

I wish I didn’t have to worry about the gigant mic GMO cornfield across the river disrupting my seed saving activities.

Maieshe Ljin wrote:I wish I didn’t have to worry about the gigant mic GMO cornfield across the river disrupting my seed saving activities.

Granted! A new pest appeared that hoovered all the corn regardless of GMO or not.

I wish the trailer that's supposed to morph into workshop space got magically cleaned and painted.

Jay Angler wrote:
I wish the trailer that's supposed to morph into workshop space got magically cleaned and painted.

Bada-bing! Magically cleaned til it sparkled and then painted with--- what's this? the genie got the bucket of varnish mixed up with the bucket of molasses?? You now have a golden, shiny trailer which is covered with gobs of molasses.

(forgot my wish)

I wish my dog would pick up his own poo.

Granted! Now your dog picks up everythings poo (even yours) and piles it up in your back yard.

I wish i was a very beautiful girl.

Granted! You are now a very beautiful girl, but since you have decided to follow permaculture, you are home all the time, and you also gave up social media. So no one knows out about it.

I wish that my plants grew faster so I could grow more during our short growing season.

Granted! Whenever you plant a seed, a tiny bonsai will immediately shoot up out of the ground.

I wish that I recognized the species of every plant I see.

Granted! You always know the species, but for some reason you always get the family and genus wrong...so frustrating!

I wish that I could remember things at least as well as normal people.

Christopher Weeks wrote:

I wish that I could remember things at least as well as normal people.

Granted! Of course, normal people have the memories of goldfish. You are now unexceptional in this regard.

I wish that our house sale would finally close so we can get started on building our house.

Granted! - Unfortunately the buyer paid you in pennies, and the bank was so annoyed with you when you went to deposit the money, that they only gave you half the value.

I wish - for the world's best pizza to be delivered to me for lunch.

Matt McSpadden wrote: I wish - for the world's best pizza to be delivered to me for lunch.

Granted! The pizza came from the best pizza place in Italy, was mailed USPS, and is really not in any condition you want to see when you are hungry.

I wish my lawn mower ran properly every time.

Granted: You now have a brand new robotic lawn mower...

Cat Knight wrote:When you play, you answer the wish of the person above you, then make a wish of your own. Please don't write a novel, a sentence or two is usually sufficient for both the wisher and the genie's response.

Wish: I wish for a permaculture design person to build be a labyrinth.

Granted! A beautiful labyrinth is now providing for all the needs of your bee

Wish! I wish for all my excess tomato fruit to be canned into my favorite salsa for me

Mike Haasl wrote:
Wish! I wish for all my excess tomato fruit to be canned into my favorite salsa for me

Granted! It wasn't canned right though, and the entire batch comes out moldy and slimy

I wish my neighbor would would quit cutting down all their trees.

Pearl Sutton wrote:I wish my neighbor would would quit cutting down all their trees.

Granted! - They now start cutting down your trees instead.

I wish - that I had more land to grow stuff on.

Matt McSpadden wrote:I wish - that I had more land to grow stuff on.

Granted! - I grant you 50 hectares... on the moon.

I wish someone would come and build me two more chicken runs linked to my brooder.

Jay Angler wrote:I wish someone would come and build me two more chicken runs linked to my brooder.

Granted! Unfortunately they were so hardworking that they worked all night. In the morning, you find that there is nothing on your land except chicken runs. Even the bedroom.

I wish for ten pounds of ripe persimmons taken to my doorstep.

Granted. You heard some pounding that had taken to your porch. You investigated to find 10 persimmons there on the steps. And a fuju perssimon tree growing beside loaded with fruit apparently spontaneously emerging overnight.

I wish for the perfect amount of everything while still allowing for contrast and desire.

Granted! You have a perfect amount of everything - for a band of capuchin monkeys, who then proceed to destroy it, all over your home.

I wish for an automatic rock picker-upper/sorter to help build gabion fence posts, from the abundance of multi-sized rocks all over our land.

Granted! There is now a hungry dragon arriving who is excellent at sorting rocks but will leave if not fed large daily quantities of fruit, root veggies, and meat.

I wish each day and each year were twice as long as they are now.