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jokes

 
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What did the guitar say to the ukulele?
Uke, I am your father.
 
r ransom
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Q. What happens to a person who fails a ukulele course?
A. He has to go to Strummer School!
 
Rusticator
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I only know 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know Y.
 
r ransom
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Two jazz guitarists meet in a bar, and one says, “Yeah man, I bought your last album, it was awesome!” to which the other replies, “Oh so that was you!”.
 
Carla Burke
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I asked my dog what’s two minus two. She said nothing.
 
Carla Burke
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What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.
 
r ransom
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What’s a duck’s favorite ballet?

The Nutquacker!

 
Carla Burke
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I told my suitcase there would be no vacations this year. Now I’m dealing with emotional baggage.
 
Carla Burke
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Why are elevator jokes so good? They work on many levels.
 
r ransom
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Ridcully told jokes like a bullfrog did accountancy. They never added up.
 
pollinator
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My ducks are absolutely not in a row.
I don't even know where some of them are.......
and I am pretty sure one of them is a pigeon.
 
Dennis Barrow
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URGENT MESSAGE !!!
Aliens are coming to earth tomorrow.
Their mission is to abduct all the good looking, sexy old people.
I'm just sharing this to say goodbye, I've got to pack.
 
pollinator
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A coworker found the following joke written inside the lid of a very full junction box inside the shaft of an elevator last week:

"What's the difference between jam and jelly?

I didn't jelly these wires into this box!"
 
Dennis Barrow
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"If at first you don't succeed, try at least 3 more times so that your ultimate failure is statistically significant..." ..   :-)
 
ice is for people that are not already cool. Chill with this tiny ad:
the next generation of humanure
https://www.richsoil.com/willow
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