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master gardeners:
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gardeners:
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jokes

 
Jay Angler
master steward
Posts: 16151
Location: Pacific Wet Coast
10615
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What kind of flooring do lizards use?

Reptiles.

Visit Redhawk's soil series: https://permies.com/wiki/redhawk-soil
How permies.com works: https://permies.com/wiki/34193/permies-works-links-threads

 
Pearl Sutton
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Posts: 16364
Location: SW Missouri
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The farmer caught Jeb with his daughter, pulled a shotgun, and told him "Marry her or I'm going to kill you!"
It was a wife or death decision

Gardens in my mind never need water
Castles in the air never have a wet basement
Well made buildings are fractal -- equally intelligent design at every level of detail.
Bright sparks remind others that they too can dance
What I am looking for is looking for me too!

 
Jay Angler
master steward
Posts: 16151
Location: Pacific Wet Coast
10615
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duck books chicken cooking food preservation ungarbage
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Dwayne Johnson paid me to clean up and organize his craft room, but sadly, I lost his scrapbook cutting tool.  

I lost the Rock’s paper scissors.

Visit Redhawk's soil series: https://permies.com/wiki/redhawk-soil
How permies.com works: https://permies.com/wiki/34193/permies-works-links-threads

 
Jay Angler
master steward
Posts: 16151
Location: Pacific Wet Coast
10615
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duck books chicken cooking food preservation ungarbage
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Did you hear about the mute motorcycle gang?

They don’t answer to nobody.

Visit Redhawk's soil series: https://permies.com/wiki/redhawk-soil
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M Ljin
gardener
Posts: 2962
Location: Zone 4b/5a
1739
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What is the difference between a holler and a valley?

It’s a matter of volume.

One can never be too kind to oneself or others.
Never our fault, always our responsibility

 
John F Dean
master steward
Posts: 8873
Location: southern Illinois, USA
3756
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I slept like a baby last night. I woke up every hour crying and wet myself.

I figure if someone from the future hasn’t tried to stop me, I can’t be messing up that bad.

 
Jay Angler
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Location: Pacific Wet Coast
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A friend of mine got a job as a bus driver because he was so good at telling people where to get off.

Visit Redhawk's soil series: https://permies.com/wiki/redhawk-soil
How permies.com works: https://permies.com/wiki/34193/permies-works-links-threads

 
Greg Martin
steward
Posts: 3580
Location: Maine, zone 5
2223
9
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What kind of stone do they traditionally use to make ondols  (the Korean heated stone slab bed)?

Bedrock

Permaculture...picking the lock back to Eden since 1978.
Pics of my Forest Garden

 
Pearl Sutton
steward & bricolagier
Posts: 16364
Location: SW Missouri
12862
2
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Want to hear a Swedish joke?

Never mind, there's Norway I could Finnish it.

Gardens in my mind never need water
Castles in the air never have a wet basement
Well made buildings are fractal -- equally intelligent design at every level of detail.
Bright sparks remind others that they too can dance
What I am looking for is looking for me too!

 
John F Dean
master steward
Posts: 8873
Location: southern Illinois, USA
3756
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Thoughts that bother me:  Assuming that the Mississippi River is the dividing line, why isn’t Colorado the Midwest and Ohio the Mideast?

I figure if someone from the future hasn’t tried to stop me, I can’t be messing up that bad.

 
Jay Angler
master steward
Posts: 16151
Location: Pacific Wet Coast
10615
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Which kind of snake keeps the car cleanest?

A windshield viper!

Visit Redhawk's soil series: https://permies.com/wiki/redhawk-soil
How permies.com works: https://permies.com/wiki/34193/permies-works-links-threads

 
John F Dean
master steward
Posts: 8873
Location: southern Illinois, USA
3756
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Strange times.  I was invited to a seance the other night.  It got raided. The medium conducting it was arrested for possession.

I figure if someone from the future hasn’t tried to stop me, I can’t be messing up that bad.

 
John F Dean
master steward
Posts: 8873
Location: southern Illinois, USA
3756
I like...
goat cat dog chicken composting toilet food preservation pig solar wood heat homestead composting
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I was probably 9 years old when I realized the man I thought was my father was really my faux pa

I figure if someone from the future hasn’t tried to stop me, I can’t be messing up that bad.

 
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